Happy Birthday, Soul Eater!
by RRJToons3
Summary: Why is Kid running around trying to celibrate birthdays? Oh yeah, I'm writing this fanfic! Woo! Excalibur...! Seven more reviews before I get to 100? Nooo!
1. Soul

Author's note: **I was going to wait for this fan fic to come out, but, I was so sure of what I was going to do with it I decided...why not? I hope you think it's as comical as the two other stories I'm working on, maybe even funnier. Enjoy!**

Soul's birthday was coming up in two days and Maka was clueless on what she was going to get for him. Blair was more prepaired than she was and she didn't even know him that well. She got him a pumpkin with a white wig, a head band and Soul's face on it. It actually looked like Soul.

Feeling guilty for not having a gift, Maka walked through town. Then she came across a motorcycle sale for $500. The motorcycle was so beautiful and big enough for them both to ride. (I wish you guys could see this awsome image in my head. I'll explain it the best way I can.) It was a white motorcycle with soul shaped headlights and a long windshield. There were two seats that looked very comfortabale. And it had huge engines in the back that were shiny as Kid's guns.

Speaking of Death the Kid...he was just relaxing, enjoying his free day from school, admiring his symmetrical home. "It's so perfect. I'm proud of myself for pulling it off." he thought. "Kid, it's the weekend. Don't you want to do anything other than just...sit here?" asked Liz. "I'm enjoying myself, Liz. Let me do so." Then they heard a knock at the door. "Who is it?" Kid walked to the door. "It's Maka, I need a favor from you." Kid opened the door.

"What do you need?" he asked. "Um...I just need a little money from you, if you don't mind."

"Sure. How much?"

"Uh...$500...?" Kid slammed the door in her face. "Come on, Kid!" He opened the door. "What the hell are you gonna do with $500?"

"It's Soul's birthday in a couple of days and I was going to get him a motorcycle."

"I want to see it. If it's worth $500, then I'll see what I can do."

So Kid and Maka walked to the motorcycle sale and kid immediatly fell in love with the bike. "That is most definatly is worth $500! It's...perfectly symmetrical! I'll try to get past my dad for some money, okay?"

Kid went to the DWMA to see his dad and get a couple of dollars from him. "Dad...can I borrow $500?" he asked. Death turned around and looked at him like he was crazy. "What are you going with $500 dollars?" he asked. "Uh...a motorcycle...?"

"You have a skateboard made especially for you, Kiddo. You have more mobility with it. Besides, I don't even think a motorcycle fits your charater."

"Well...you see...it's not for me."

"Then who is it for?"

"Soul...?"

"Soul already has that type of vehicle."

"I know but...um..."

"Kid, it's very nice of you to get him a motorcycle but he already has one. I'm not giving you the $500."

"Why does it matter? You sit in the acadamy all day!"

Alright, fine! You can have the $500."

"Thanks."

Kid got the $500 dollars for Maka, but when he got there, Maka told him that the sale was over and the motorcycle was back to it's regular price which was $900. "There is no way I'm getting $900 from my dad. It's impossible!" snapped Kid. "But your dada sits in the acadamy all day. It won't matter." Maka pointed out. "Ugh! Fine! I'll try!"

So Kid ran back to the acadamy and on his way there, he ran into Black*Star. "Kid, I was just looking for you! I need some money from you! It's Soul's birthday in...one...TWO days and I was gonna get him a guitar! Yahoo!" he screamed. "Black*Star, do you have to let the world know that?"

"I need...$100!"

"Black*Star, calm down! I'll...I'll see what I can do..."

So on Kid's way to the acadamy, he ran into Blair. "Hi, Kid! Can I borrow $20 from you?" she asked. "What are you gonna do with it?"

"I need a big flash light for this pumpkin I have for Soul!"

"Can I kill Soul?"

"No! Pleeeeeese?" she begged, shoving her boobs in his face. "Ahhhhh! Okay! Okay! Fine! I'll see what I can do!"

Kid continued his walk to the acadamy, and after earning so many money trips, he decided to start running. But...sadly, he still managed to run into somebody. He ran into Liz. "Kid, I've been looking for you everywhere! I need $80 for a leather jacket I found for Soul, okay? Thanks!" Liz ran off before Kid could say that he couldn't go this far. But it was too late now. Kid had to scoop up $1100 for his friends and Kid didn't even have a gift to give. He finally made it to the acadamy without running into anybody else. "Dad...can I borrow $1100?"

"Now you're getting out hand. What are you going to do with all that money?"

"Um...give it away...?"

"That's outragious!"

"What are you going to do with it? You stay in the acadamy all day!"

"Kid, $1100? Seriously?"

"Look, Maka needs $900 for a motorcycle, Black*Star needs $100 for a guitar, Blair needs $20 for a flashlight, and Liz needs $80 for a jacket!"

"What? These are really weird requests. Why would Maka want a motorcycle? She'll break every bone in her body if she tried to ride some thing like that. Black*Star doesn't know anything about playing a guitar. Blair should have plenty of flashlights since she has all those pumpkins. And Liz...she would buy a jacket I guess. But still..."

"It's all for Soul! It's his birthday ina couple of days! You should know that!"

"Oh yeah! I forgot all about that! But I'm still not giving you the money."

"Why? Why do you care? You stay in the acadamy all day-"

"Okay! Okay! Fine! You can take the darn $1100!"

"Thanks, Dad!"

Kid finally got the money for his friends and on his way there he came across a piano sale. "Hmm. I don't have for Soul. He knows how to play the piano..."

Two days later, Kid was no where to be found. Everyone was ar Soul's birthday party, but no one had a gift for Soul. He was pissed. Blair was the only one who had her gift because she made it herself, but since she didn't have the flashlight, it was hard to see the face and it looked like a big pumpkin with a wig. Suddenly, they heard the sound of a motor. It was Kid! He was riding the motorcycle with the piano atached to it all the way to the front of the house. "Happy Birthday, Soul!" he cheered as he opened up the piano, revealing all the presents that was promised. "All theses things are from you?" asked Soul. "Nope. I just bought them. The piano is from me, the motorcycle is from Maka, the guitar is from Black*Star, and the flashlight is for that blank pumpkin over there."

"Wait, Kid, where's the jacket?" asked Liz. "I thought Soul wouldn't want a jacket so I used the $80 for the piano."

"Aw...Kid, I would love a jacket! I don't want white, because it get dirty easily, I don't know how to play guitar, and the pumpkin might rot!" Soul whined. Kid got so angry he flicked him off. "Fuck you, take the damn presents." Soul just blushed. "Okay...it's the thought that counts anyway, right?"

Author's note: **So tell me what you think. Request a charater and I'll celibrate their birthday.**


	2. Chrona

Author's note: **Guess what? I got a request! This certain request brought me to this chapter. (Chrona is girl) I'm telling you now: This contains...LYAO! Enjoy!**

Soul and Maka were called to the Death Room. "Is there somethinng you need, Lord Death?" asked Maka. "Ah, yes. It's about Chrona. Her birthday is coming up in a few days and I was thinking of a surprise birthday party for her. I'm pretty sure her cold-hearted mother never threw one for her. So it will be a great influence for her."

"There's only one problem: Chrona probably couldn't _deal _with a party." joked Soul. "!" Maka hit him in the head with a book. "Um...he didn't mean it, Lord Death. We'll see what we could do."

So Soul and Maka went home and explained the suprise party for Chrona to Blair and she agreed to help by doing the decorations. She also (somewhat) agreed to keep her boobs to herself or else she'll ruin everything. Maka was inviting people to the party (people Chrona can tolerate). Soul...I don't know. Black*Star, Tsubaki, Kid, Liz and Patty were pumped. They couldn't wait to see Chrona's reaction.

But, through the days, there have been some difficulties. Blair just had pumpkins all over the place for the decorations, and damn...they stunk! But Maka should have seen that coming! Her ass already knows that Blair only lives for Soul, nudity, and some damn pumpkins! Maka invited Dr. Stein and Sid to the party to be nice. There's something wrong with her because she already knew those two freak her out! Plus, they remembered that the party would be for Ragnarok too, so they had to start all over again! This time, Maka was working decorations (after clearing those stanky ass pumpkins), Soul had to keep Stein and Sid from the party, and Blair was trying to hypnotize herself from runninig around the house naked. Hey, it's better than just sitting around doing nothing.

Maka called herself putting books all over the place...old books. They stunk too! "Maka, it's not your birthday party, it's Chrona and Ragnarok's. Chrona can't possibly be into books as much as you are. He's not gonna read this stuff. And Ragnarok's a baby now. Even if he wasn't, he still wouldn't give a damn. I'll take care of the decorations, you sit down somewhere. You're just screwing things up." said Soul. "!" This time she hit him because of the way he put it, even though she clearly understood what he was trying to say. (at least she tried. Soul bearly did anything.)

So it was Blair's turn to get Stein and Sid away from the party but Death Sythe was there (drunk) and she almost got raped. Maka had to go to him and hit him with a book...a big book...I'm talking nearly 1,000 pages here! She almost killed her poor father. He was out for a couple days...so...I think she did kill him. Oh well.

Meanwhile, Kid, Black*Star and their weapons were shopping for presents. "So...what would be the right present for Chrona?" asked Black*Star. "Um...I heard Soul and Maka got her hooked on writing poetry..." said Tsubaki. "So...?"

"Um...we can get him a notebook and pencil...?"

"No! No! That would never do! What were you thinking, Tsubaki?" snapped Kid.

"Well, there really isn't much of a choice. We don't know what Chrona's into. Let's just...get her a card." Liz suggested. "No! Liz, a card? Really?" snapped Kid. "We can get a teddy bear for Ragnarok." said Patty. "He doesn't want to except that he's a baby, Patty!" Obviously Kid. "Then what do _you_ suggest, genius?" asked Liz. "We should get her a napkin box so that all her tears don't have to live in her dress." Black*Star started giggling and Liz just slapped Kid in the face. "Sorry! Okay! Okay! We'll get her a blindfold so that she doesn't have to see anything she can't deal with." Black*Star started laughing and Liz hit him harder. "Alright! Alright! We'll get her a box so that she can hide from the world." At this point, Black*Star was on the floor laughing his ass off and Kid was on the floor in serious pain because Liz let him have it again. "On second thought...a card sounds like a good idea for someone like Chrona...make it nice..." Kid groaned as he passed out. "Or we could get her a hemet so that she won't get hit in the head by Ragnarok! Ha ha ha!" laughed Black*Star, who was getting too carried away. Liz beat him down to the ground too. "Ya know...I agree with Kid...make it nice..." Black*Star groaned as he also passed out.

The party was finally finished. All they had to do now was surprize Chrona. When she came and opened the door, everyone said, "Surprize! Happy Birthday, Chrona!" But, before Chrona heard half of what they said, Chrona ran away. She thought that they were trying to scare her. "That wasn't nice! Why would they do that? Why would they scare me like that on my birthday?" she whined as she still kept running.

Meanwhile, Everyone was pissed about Chrona running off.

"I hypnotized myself from nudity..." said Blair.

"I did decorations..." said Soul.

"I killed my dad..." said Maka.

"I got beat by Liz..." said Kid.

"I did too..." said Black*Star.

"AND SHE RAN OFF!" everyone yelled. "Who will get him back?" asked Tsubaki. "Kid will." said Maka. "Why me?"

"You have the skateboard. You're faster. Quickly, go get her, Kid!"

So Kid went after her. He was fast enough to catch up to her, but he startled her and she swung her hand back hard enough to knock Kid off the board. "Dammit! What the hell is wrong with that girl?" He quickly got back on his skateboard and went after he again. This time, Kid skated in front of her. "Ahhhh!" Chrona was so shook up she just started beating the hell out of Kid. "Ugh! I hate girls so much!" Then Ragnarok came out (from his long nap) and started hitting her on the head. "What are you doing now, Chrona?" Kid slowly got up, still in pain. "Stop it, Ragnarok! That hurts!" whined Chrona. "Maybe we should have gotten the helmet..." thought Kid. "Cut it out, you two! It's your birthday! This is unnessesary!"

"If you care about my birthday so much, then why did you scare me?"

"We wern't trying to scare you. We wanted to surprise you. It's your first birthday party and we wanted to make it special for you, and Ragnarok. Come back to the house. You're ruining your own party." Chrona was so touched she started crying. "That's the nicest thing anybody has done for me. I don't know how to deal with something like this!" Kid rolled his eyes. He didn't feel like hearing this shit. He just wanted to give her the card and get back home. "Okay! Whatever! Just go already so that I can give you your stupid card! _Should've got the bitch a napkin box! I knew she was going to act like this. She's gonna flood up the world with those tears of hers!_"

So when Chrona got back, she apoligized for the misunderstanding and enjoyed her first party...until Blair's naked ass came out of nowhere and shoved her boobs in Chrona's face accidentally. So she ran away again. "I told you to keep some clothes on so you don't ruin everything!" snapped Maka, choking Blair. "Ugh...I guess I'll go get her...again." whined Kid as he walked back outside. "Dammit, if you don't get your black-blooded ass back in that house I will shove it down your throat!" Kid snapped, two seconds away from doing so. "But I don't know how to deal with big boobs!" whined Chrona. "You're a girl in this fanfic, you'll have no choice!" Chrona sadly went back in the house. "You know, Kid, I'm gonna get a sex change for my birthday." she said as she went back inside. Kid just sat down on the steps, highly disturbed, and spit up blood.

Author's note:** So tell me what you think and feel free to request.**


	3. Kid

Author's note: **I got another request! Two of them acually. And the first one I will give you is Death the Kid himself! And of corse this will contain a ridiculious amount of symmetry...XD! By the way, Liz is going to be a bit OOC so just...excuse her. Enjoy it!**

Liz and Patty had everyone, except for Kid in the front of the acadamy for a discussion.

"Okay, everyone, attention! We all know what's coming up in a few days. Kid's birthday. We also know that this party that we have for him MUST be perfect or else he will destroy us all. It will be at his house, for once so there MUST be a symmetrical number of people in the house or else he will destroy us all. If you get any presents for him, they MUST be symmetrical or else he will destroy us all. Get the picture? Celibrating his birthday is a dangerous mission. It MUST be perfect. If it's not perfect, we will all die. It's very important. So, who is willing to take the risk of celibrating the birthday of the grim reeper? Because I am!" annouced Liz.

"Does this have to be so serious? Calm down Liz." said Soul.

"This IS serious!" snapped Liz.

"You _are_ getting a little out of control." Maka pointed out.

"But guys, you know Kid. He will kill us if anything is out of place."

"We don't have to celibrate his birthday." said Black*Star.

"That's suicide! If Kid doesn't kill us, then Lord Death will. You know how he is about his son."

"I don't know, Lord Death is pretty nice. I don't think he'd-" Tsubaki started.

"He would kill us! I guaruntee it!"

"I don't know how to deal with something like this. Kid sounds scary right now. I don't think I was _ever_ able to deal with him." whined Chrona. (Still a girl)

"You're only gonna be there for the surprize. There MUST be eight people in that house."

"Well, his house is already symmetrical, what more could you do?" asked Blair.

"That's one of the things that makes it dangerous: decorations! Nothing curly! There must be no curls!"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down, Liz. We have plenty of time." said Soul.

"Yeah, you're starting to sound like him." Black*Star pointed out.

"To please Kid, ya gotta BE Kid!"

This made everybody laugh hysterically.

"Um...no thanks." said Tsubaki.

"I'd rather kill him." said Black*Star.

"I'm not being that nut." said Soul.

"I don't know how to deal with being Kid." whined Chrona.

"I get the point! Just shut up! This is very important!" snapped Liz.

"No it's not, just calm down, breath and break down how this going to go." said Soul.

"Okay, um...Soul, Maka, Blair, you three are on decorations. Good luck. That's the hardest part. Make sure it matches with his symmetrical home, or else you will die. Work on them the day before Kid's big day. Don't let Chrona help. She will take too long. The rest of you feel free to buy some symmetrical images for him. The day before his birthday we will act like we don't know about it. Black*Star, Tsubaki, pretend to fall asleep in is classes incase Lord Death annouces it. Me and Patty are going to bake a perfectly symmetrical cake for him. That will be a challenge. Any questions?"

No one said anything. So everyone left to get ready for the most "dangerous" birthday to celibrate.

The next day, Black*Star and Tsubaki looked for presents. The store was a mess. There was hardly anything symmetrical. They looked around the store, even though they didn't see an owner or anybody there. Suddenly, the drunken owner came by the store and pushed them out the way. "Who the HELL are you? Why the HELL are you in my DAMN store? Who the HELL told you to come here?" he yelled. "Why the HELL are you mad at us for being COSTUMERS?" yelled Black*Star. "Oh...well look around!" he screamed, getting louder by each word. "Um...sir? Do you have any symmetrical paintings?" asked Tsubaki. "Why the HELL does it have to be SYMMETRICAL? Who gives a DAMN about SYMMETRY?"

As soon as the drunken owner said that, sadly, Kid was walking by. "What was that? Who gives a damn?" Black*Star and Tsubaki just backed up and continued to look for paintings. "Yeah! I said it!" the dead man walked screamed, still getting louder by each word. " I GIVE A DAMN! IF YOU EVER IN YOUR LIFE SAY THAT AGAIN I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN AND KILL YOUR ASS! IS THAT UNDERSTOOD?" Kid hollerd, louder than the owner could ever reach. As soon as the drunken owner said anything else, they heard a sudden, "Yahoo! I found a perfectly symmetrical painting for Kid's birthday! Ha ha ha! Nobody will ever top my present!"

Tsubaki blushed in embarassment. "Black*Star you ruined it. Kid's right there. We're not supposed to know about his birthday." Kid was discusted at this week surprize ruined by Black*Star. "Thanks a lot, guys. You would be the ones to screw something like that up for me. Thanks!" Black*Star and Tsubaki felt bad for ruining the surprize. "Do you still want the painting? We have two of them so that you can display them on both sides of your house." Black*Star offered. "Sure. Aren't you going to pay for it?"

"Right! Tsubaki, the money!"

"I thought that you had it, Black*Star." The owner kicked the two out and Kid was upset. They couldn't even make it up with the present they were going to give him. So on Kid's birthday, he took a walk instead of letting everyone know that Black*Star ruined everything. It wouldn't be fair on his friends.

"Hmph. My big day...ruined. All because of that blue-haired idiot." he thought. He looked up at the sky and noticed something he never saw before. It was a mountain. A mountain that seemed symmetrical. It puzzled Kid for a moment.

"Symmetrical? A-symmetrical? Symmetrical? A-symmetrical? Dammit! I can't figure it out! It looks symmetrical but it's a mountain! Mountains are never symmetrical! The rocks are always lumpy and out of place! it can't be, but it could be! What the hell is it? Symmetrical? A-symmetrical? Symmetrical? A-symmetrical? I have to find out!" Kid summoned his skateboard and flew up to the mountain to examine it.

Meanwhile, Evryone was looking for Kid. They were just standing around in his house, waiting for him to come, but he wasn't anywhere to be found. Black*Star looked down. he knew what he did but he wasn't going to speak of it. Liz was freaking out. "Where the hell is he? Everything is absolutly perfect and he isn't even here! I need five of you assholes to go look for that reeper! Now!" she snapped. "Wait, did you just call us 'assholes'?" asked Soul. "Yes I did, now get going!"

Kid made it to the mountain, and it turned out that it was symmetrical. It also turned out that it wasn't real either. There was a door there and Kid couldn't resist looking inside. It was a symmetrical heaven. It was filled with all kinds of symmetrical images formed together to make a perfectly symmetrical room. Absolutly perfect. Kid fell to his knees in amazment and started crying. "I've never seen anything so beautiful in my life! There are even other doors inside! I have to look inside!"

Maka, Soul, Blair, and Chrona, who was counted as two people, went out to look for Kid. It also turned out that since Chrona and Ragnarok were two people, there were actually 9 people in the house just now. Now they had to fetch Stein and Sid to the house when they came back. Liz was pissed. "What do we do when we find Kid?" asked Stein after the kids picked him and Death Sythe up. Sid couldn't make it (I don't think he's the man to go to a kid's party). "I don't know. I guess we just have to draw him to the house somehow." said Maka. "This is wonderful. A walk with my Maka." said Death Sythe. "Papa, please don't start." whined Maka, trying to be calm.

Kid ran all around the mountain, admiring it's perfect symmetry and taking a look at the rooms. There were three doors on both sides of the room. Kid looked at the first pair of doors and they were both the same. They led to two symmetrical bathrooms that were built the same way the main room was. The other two rooms were symmetrical bedrooms, also built with symmetrical images. Tears were wildly flying out of Kid's eyes in amazment. And to think there was more to discover in this perfectly symmetrical beauty.

The seven went back to Kid's house to report that Kid was nowhere to be found. Liz was starting to get worried. (back to herself) Was her meister alright? Was he in trouble? Liz ordered everyone to search everywhere for him, even out side of Death City if they had to. She wanted to make sure Kid was alright.

Kid looked into a tunnel that was visible from the entrance and dicovered a symmetrical kitchen that was of corse built the same way everything else was. Kid cried until he got a nosebleed. This was the best birthday he ever had. Now he was glad that Black*Star ruined the surprize, because it turned out that he made it ten times better. He just stayed there and blissfully fell asleep, forgeting all about his friends, who were frenzing around the city looking for him.

The kids all came back together in Kid's house to report that Kid has not been found. This really upset Liz. "I hope he's alright...where ever he is." Black*Star's was too heavy for him to carry. He had to tell everyone that he ruined it. As soon as he got everyone's attention, he was interupted by a fimiliar voice saying, "There you are, Liz, Patty. What are all you guys doing here?"

It was Kid. The meister was okay. No one had anything else better to say than, "Happy Birthday, Kid!" Black*Star felt better now that he seen that Kid was in a good mood. "Thank you, so much, you guys. Chrona opened the door and revealed Kid's symmetrical birthday party. "Liz told us not to have anything curly but they didn't have anything straight at the store, so we just displayed the streamers symmetrically on both sides of the house, if that's okay with you." she explained.

"A journey though some kind of symmetrical heaven and a symmetrical party to end the day? Wow! Thank you! All of you! This has been the best birthday ever!" cried Kid. "No problem, but the one who's truly responsible is Liz. She had to be ya to please ya." said Soul.

"Liz...you set up that magnificently symmetrical mountain, filled with symmetrical images, formed into symmetrical rooms?" asked Kid. "Umm..." Liz had no idea what he was talking about, but before she managed to tell him that, he sprung out and hugged her, almost knocking her down. "That's the nicest thing you've ever done for me. Thank you." Liz just blushed and took the credit for whatever Kid was talking about.

Author's note: **By the way, Kid was still crying that whole time and his nose was bleeding clouts. Everything I promised: OOC and symmetry! Tsubaki's birthday next! Review me!**


	4. Tsubaki

Author's note: **Um...yeah. I forgot to tell you that the creator of the mountain was Lord Death. Wooo! Two chapters in a day! Chrona's True Sorrow, as promised, here goes Tsubaki! Enjoy!**

Black*Star and Soul were hanging out, thinking of what to do for Tsubaki on her birthday.

"Pay close attention! Black*Star is talking!" he annouced. (he as in obviously Black*Star) "In a few days, it will be aTsubaki's birthday, and I'm planning a big performance for her. A sing and dance performance. There is only one problem: I don't have a song. We only have a few days to come with one so that I can come up with some awsome dance moves. Anyone have any ideas?" It was silent. He only had five days to come up with this stuff. Then Soul broke the silence with, "Um...we can involve Kid." Black*Star looked at him like he was crazy. "Yeah right! What does that stuck up grim reeper know about singing?" he laughed. "Who else do we have? Kid's our friend too. He might be able to help."

"Kid can't sing. There's no way. And he most definatly couldn't come up with dance moves. We'd be dancing like robots."

"At least give him a chance."

"Fine. He better be a good help!"

Soul and Black*Star explained the situation with Kid, even thiugh Black*Star didn't want to do this.

"Hm. Well, I'm not much of a singer, but I can rap." Black*Star busted out with a super high pitched laugh. "Yeah right! You'll never be able to rap! Ha ha ha!" he screamed.

"Keep your mouth shut,  
>you know not what you say,<br>because I can rap all night and day.  
>I can do it,<br>cause you know you can't.  
>Your mouth is untrusty,<br>rusty,  
>and blant.<br>You can't even talk one single word,  
>but I can sing things you never heard.<br>So keep your mouth shut.  
>Keep you mouth shut.<br>Make sure you keep it nice it and tight.  
>You say I can't sing,<br>not a word,  
>not a thing,<br>but compared to your vacancy,  
>there's no way you're right." Kid rapped.<p>

Soul was standing there in amazment. Kid's never done this before. "Did you see how fast he came up with that? He's gonna get us a song in no time!" he said. "No way! That was nothing! Kid, you have four days to come up with a song. You got that?" snapped Black*Star. Kid nodded. "Liz, Patty, give me a beat." Liz started beboxing (however you spell it) and patty mummed to the beat. Kid thought for a moment and busted out with another freestyle rap in less than seconds. Black*Star was jealous of how quickly he came up with a birthday song made espeicially for Tsubaki and he couldn't even come up with a word, just like in Kid's short rap bust.

So the next day, The three discusted how things would go, along with Maka. Kid came up with the song, Black*Star worked dance moves and Maka had to give the cake at the end of the performance. The performance was taking place at an old broke down autitorium. To get her there, Black*Star was going to pay a couple of friends to chase her and Kid. Liz worked the cake.

This is what Black*Star put together, which for once wasn't a bad idea. Kid on the other hand didn't want to bring Tsubaki to the performance the way he said he wanted him to because he didn't want Tsubaki to fall in love with him. The plan was that the two boys that Black*Star was going to pay had to harrass him and Tsubaki while Kid didn't have his weapons. So they start to run and Kid leads her to the autitorium to hide...even though that's something Kid would never do.

"First of all, I would never hide from anyone. Second of all, knowing Tsubaki, she would fall in love with me if I 'saved' her from these guys and brought her to this amazing performance to top it all off. I bet you if I did that she would thank me." snapped Kid. "She's not going to fall in love with you." said Black*Star. "Yes she is! I know it!" Kid started to whine now. "Stop your whining, Kid. Everything will be okay."

The day after that, Maka went out for presents with Blair and Chrona (still a girl). "What the hell does Tsubaki like? She's as weak as Chrona. They're such girls! Chrona's the worst girl in the world! She should be a boy! It would be better off if she were a boy! Then she can man up, but she can't because she's a girl in this fanfic!" screamed Ragnarok. "Ragnarok, stop yelling in my ear. That hurts." whined Chrona. "Everything hurts! What doesn't hurt?" Ragnarok screamed even louder. "Stop it. You're going into scream resonance." Ragnarok went into scream resonanace and threw Maka and Blair off track. They forgot what they were shopping for! So Maka bought a book and Blair bought underwear. Chrona got a funeral hat and Ragnarok got a handful of candy. When they came out of the store, Maka and Blair remembered what they were shopping for but since they already spent all the money, they just rapped up the book, the underwear, and hat. Ragnarok ate the candy.

It was the final day, Tsubaki's birthday. Everything was set. Now Kid just had to pick up Tsubaki. He walked up to her and nervously asked her to take a walk with him. With her being so obidient, she accepted. The two guys were sent out as they walked. "Hey, dickhead!" one of them shouted. "What the hell? Who called me a dickhead? Who called that corny ass name?" thought Kid, who seriously thought that name was weak. He looked around and noticed the two. "What do want?" he asked. The two boys pulled up guns, real guns, and pointed them at Kid and Tsubaki. "Give us all you got! Now that the Thomson sisters are gone, we're the fear of the streets!" yelled one of the boys. "Well, for your information, I own the sisters now, so I'm the fear of the streets."

"Hold the hell on. Don't tell me that blue-haired idiot payed the new fear of the streets to chase us. That dumb-ass. I knew this idea was too good to be true." thought Kid. He grabbed Tsubaki's hand and tried to run off, but someone like Kid could never run away from a fight. He had to get them out the way. He couldn't resist.

He ran up to them, dodging the bullets, and kicked the guns out their hands and flipped back to kick them in the face. Kid sighed in realieve and walked back to Tsubaki, until one of the boys suddenly shot him down. Tsubaki was terrified. Suddenly, Kid sprung back up. "WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR FUCKING PROBLEM?" he snapped. Tsubaki was relieved. Kid was alright, but what the hell what that outburst all about? Oh yeah...the symmetry. He only shot one arm. He's pissed now. "YOU ONLY SHOT ONE OF MY FUCKING ARMS! NOW I'M FUCKING UNBALACED, YOU FUCKING BASTARDS! I'M GONNA HAVE TO FUCKING KILL YOU NOW!"

The whole time Kid was having his little 'fucking' episode, the boys shot rapidly at him until they both ran out of bullets. Kid wasn't getting up. Tsubaki didn't know what to do. She thought they killed Kid. So when the boys went to rob Kid's 'dead' body, Kid jumped up and grabbed their guns to just beat the hell out of them. They couldn't even move. Kid was so pissed off he started screaming and Tsubaki just stood there in confusment. "Wow. What a great birthday present." she sighed sadly. "Birthday? Birthday! Oh shit! Oh shit! Oh shit! Tsubaki! Um...the walk! The walk! Let's continue the walk!" Kid snapped as he pulled Tsubaki to the autitorium.

Kid and Tsubaki finally arrived, but stopped to get a quick breath, but Kid was so tired he leaned againt the wall on Tsubaki. And damn...it did not look right. Soul peeked out the curtain to see if Kid came back. All he seen was Kid leaned up against her, breathing hard. So he spit up blood and passed out. When Kid and Tsubaki got their breath, Kid walked her up to the front row and jumped on stage.

"Happy Birthday, Tsubaki. I welcome you to a special performance arraged by Black*Star, your meister. Please enjoy." Kid annouced. Kid walked back stage to call up the group and Soul woke back up. "What took you so long? Did you really have to have sex with her to get her over here? That's just gross, Kid." said Soul. "What are you talking about? I didn't do that. We were just tired." Kid explained. "Tired out from the sex." replied Soul. "What do you know about this stuff anyway? Just get on stage, you asshole."

Soul, Black*Star, Liz, Patty and Kid went on stage. This time, Patty was the one beboxing (still don't know how to spell it. Tell me if you know).

~Order of song~~~

All: (chanting) Tsu-Tsu-Tsubaki! Tsu-Tsu-Tsubaki! Tsu-Tsu-Tsubaki! Woooo!

(Music starts)

Black*Star: (Rapping)  
>Tsubaki's 16 years old.<br>Star on her chest,  
>that's painted in gold.<br>Everyday, she always follows,  
>no attention to her sorrows.<br>but today is a new story,  
>'cause we're giving her the glory.<p>

All: (Singing) Happy Birthday to ya! Happy Birthday to ya, Tsubaki! Happy Birthday to ya! To you from me.

Kid:  
>Not much of a smile on her face,<br>'til somebody puts her in her place.  
>No one really understood her case,<br>but now we can pick up her pace.

Soul:  
>This is a special day for you,<br>so don't ever think we don't love you too.  
>The correction,<br>much attentioon.  
>Says Kid and Black*Star, "Such perfection."<p>

All: (Singing) Happy Birthday to ya! Happy Birthday to ya, Tsubaki! Happy Birthday to ya! To you from me.

Soul: Black*Star says, "All eyes on me.",  
>Kid: Soul thinks the coolest is he,<br>Liz: Maka hits people with poetry,  
>Black*Star: and Kid's obsessed with symmetry.<br>Kid: But that doesn't matter as in today,  
>Soul: 'cause we're gonna have it all your way.<br>Liz: I think our friend needs a-  
>All: Hooray!<br>Black*Star: Now come and get your birthday cake!

They formed into a square with Maka behind them, holding up a small chocolate cake and Black*Star on her sholders to be at the top of the formed square. Tsubaki cried. She was so touched. "Oh Kid, thank you so much! All of you!" she cried. "Just hurry up and get up here. I don't think Maka can stay like this for long." said Kid. "Wait...she thought it was Kid's idea." Maka pointed out. "What? What makes Kid so great in these fanfics?" snapped Black*Star. Tsubaki came up and got the cake so that everyone could come out of position. She gave Black*Star a kiss on the check, and quickly kissed Kid on his lips, making him spit up blood and pass out. "Tsubaki, we got you some presents." said Blair, taking out the boxes.

"Oh...um...a book about...cheating men...um nice? Thank you?" said Tsubaki, who really wasn't all that into books. "Oh...um...a hat...for funerals. Thanks, Chrona." Chrona looked down. She could tell that she didn't like it. "Ah! Underwear? Oh...my...um...thanks, I guess?" Then all of a sudden, they heard Kid scream, "Dammit, Black*Star! I will kill you! We almost got killed by some old friends of Liz and Patty and Tsubaki fell in love with me...but damn...she can kiss...BUT STILL! The bitch is in love with me!" Black*Star just shrugged. "Sorry. Liz and Patty said that we could trust them because they really weren't much of a treat...but then again...I think I forgot to pay him..." Kid stood still for a second. And then next thing you knew, Black*Star was getting his ass kicked by Kid, while Tsubaki wathched him and fell in deeper love with him.

Author's note: **Chorna's True Sorrow, thank you very much for this request! I was so pumped to type that song down! XD! I will now work on a different story until another request comes! By the way, I don't really agree with KidXTsubaki, as cute as it would be, I don't because they never talk to each other! XC. Review?**


	5. Black Star part 1

Author's note: **I am very very very sorry for taking so long. I have been ridiculiously interupted for days so please forgive me and read this freaking chapter. It's Black*Star's birthday, so do it for Black*Star...who makes Kid OOC and dead.**

Kid, Maka, Tsubaki and their weapons were in a large garage sorting out things for Black*Star's birthday.

Kid brought a blue paper with a picture of an eight foot stage that was supose to be three feet wide. This was the big plan. They were going to build a huge stage for Black*Star to do all his performances. Kid was going to arrange this...which he pretty much did by skecthing the stage. So now they had to build it. That was the true challenge, but since Kid is a good artictech it wasn't going to be much of a big deal. Soul was upset because he didn't come up with the idea.

"Here is how the stage will look: It will be eight feet tall and three feet wide. There will be four speakers: two on one side and two on the other as you can see on the picture. They must be set in an abosolutly perfect stance. The curtain will run across the stage but it will not be red, it will dark blue, representing Black*Star's blue hair. There will be a black belt running across the bottom to represent that suit Black*Star wears. Is that understood? Any questions?" said Kid. "Does it have to be eight feet tall?" asked Soul.

"Fine...It will be three feet tall and eight feet wide!"

"Damn, Black*Star is only one person. How much space does he need?"

"Okay! It will be three feet tall and wide!"

"Three feet is pretty small."

"What do you want?"

"Six feet?"

"Hell no! That`s a foot away from seven feet! We can`t take that risk!"

"Five feet?"

"It`s A-symmetrical, but I guess it will do. Soul, Maka, you will buy the four speakers, Tsubaki, you will buy the belt and curtain, Blair and Chrona will buy gifts for him if they wish to do so, and we will buy the supplies to build the stage. If we need help, we will call. Understood?" Everyone nodded as they walked out the door. "Kid, this is impossible. How can we build it on our own?" asked Liz. "Don't worry, I have everything under control. Just look at my perfectly symmetrical home."

A few days later, Kid and his weapons finished the first layer of the stage. Liz wanted to measure it so that they can go on without Kid freaking out. "Liz, what are you doing?" asked Kid. "Um...I was going to measure the-"

"I can't let you do that. If you measure it, you'll try to half-step and throw us off and I would have to kill you and find a new set of weapons." Kid climbed up the layer to measure it.

"It's a millimeter taller! Dammit!" he shouted. "Kid, don't freak out up there!" yelled Liz. "It will take forever to get that millimeter off!" Kid spit up blood hard enough to fall off the layer all the way to the top of his weapons. "Kid, it's just a millimeter. Don't worry about it." said Liz. "No! It has to be EXCACTLY five feet tall!" snapped Kid. "It's too small, Kid. It's impossible." Kid sighed sadly. "As sad as it is...you're right. A millimeter is just too small...BUT WE WILL TRY!" Liz rolled her eyes as her meister spoke these words.

Soul and Maka didn't have enough money to buy the speakers so they went to the last person the wanted to see: Maka's dad, Spirit.

"Money? For my Maka? Of course!" he shouted. "Just answer the 50 dollar question and this one goes to Soul: Have you done anything to my baby?" Soul rolled his eyes. "No, sir. I haven't knocked her up or anything..." he joked as Spirt punched him dead in the face. "Damn! I was just joking! I haven't done anything to your daughter!" snapped Soul as Spirit gave him the $50 and suddenly snatched it back away. "Wait, what are you using this for? A condom?" asked Spirit. Maka blushed. "Papa...cut it out. You're embarassing me!" she whined. "Sorry, honey. Just making sure." He gave them the money and they went off to the store.

Tsubaki was also broke, but she had no one to go to. She had to earn the money. But how? She walked around looking for a way to earn money. Then she came across a trio of dancers. They were getting money for their marvelous tap-dancing. She walked up to them to ask if she could join.

Blair had her own money from working at the bar. Her and Chrona (a boy once again) went shopping for gifts. "I don't know how to deal with shopping. I was an epic fail in four chapters so far." whined Chrona. "It's okay. You can pick this time." said Blair. "Are you sure?" Blair nodded. Chrona looked around to see what Black*Star would like.

Kid and the weapons were working on that millimeter. Kid drew a line to mark where he was going to cut. Liz was up there to hold the chain saw. "Kid, this is dangerous. That line is way too short. You might cut yourself." Liz pointed out. "Don't worry, I'll take my time." Kid slowly cut through the wood, with a metal ruler at the very bottom to keep from cutting any lower than the millimeter. He was standing on a ladder with wheels to move. Liz and Patty were rolling him. Black*Star barged in to see what all the noise was.

"Hey, guys! What's going on?" he hollarded. He startled Kid and made him cut himself and fall off the ladder. He fell on top of Liz and Patty and the saw came down to fall on them. Black*Star caught the dangerous blade right on time. Kid and his weapons were okay. "Sorry about that. I just wanted to see what all that noise was. You okay?" he asked. Kid just nodded. He was still freaked out about the sudden incident. "What are you working on?" asked Black*Star. "It's nothing! It was just here so we just started messing with it. We might turn it into a symmetrical statue or something." said Kid. "Maybe a symmetrical version of Lord Death!" blurted Patty. "Don't over do it, Patty." Kid mumbled angrily. "Well it's a good thing I came. You guys would've been all chopped up. I saved your lives! Yahoo!" yelled Black*Star as he walked out.

"Well, girls, let's get back to work." said Kid as he noticed a chip in the layer. "Dammit! I chipped the layer when I cut myself! NO!" he cried. "Wait...why don't we use that little millimeter to build the other layers and cut it off at the end?" Liz suggested. Kid looked up and imagined the stage with the millimeter standing alone. He wanted to cut it off so badly. But it was just in the cut. It would be easy to cut off. "You're right, Liz. That would work...after I sand off that chip."

Soul and Maka looked around at a store for speakers. Nothing. They walked outside and saw a man. He looked very crazy. He wore a huge jacket. "Hello, children. You look lost." he said. "I'm a walking store. If you need anything from me I'm sure I'll have it." Maka didn't trust him. Any guy with a jacket filled with tons of stuff in it isn't for real. "Okay. Got any speakers?" asked Soul. "No! We can't trust him, Soul!" said Maka. "He's all we got. Give him a chance." Soul pointed out. Maka nodded in agreement. "So...it's speakers you want?" asked the man. The partners nodded. "Well I have four big ones for 50 bucks. Sound good to you?" he offered. "Four speakers. Great. Just what we needed. We'll take it." said Soul. He handed the man the $50 and took the four speakers. Things were going well for them so far.

The trio let Tsubaki join the group. The problem was, she was ruining everything. She kept tripping over and missing steps. The more she made these mistakes the more money the group lost. They couldn't even draw big crowds anymore so Tsubaki was kicked out. "Get the hell out my group! You and your too left feet cost too much money!" snapped the leader. "I'm sorry, sir. I'm not used to dancing much." said Tsubaki. "Then why would you join the group?" asked one of the members. "It's my friend, Kid. He's building a stage for my meister's birthday and I was helping out, but I didn't have any money so I..." The trio thought for a moment to see what they should do for her.

"I don't know what to do! What would Black*Star like?" snapped Chrona. "It's okay, Chrona! Calm down!" said Blair. "May I help you, ladies?" asked a man who worked in the store. "Um, excuse me, sir, but I'm not a lady in this fanfic anymore. I'm a boy again." said Chrona. "I'm sorry, sir. The last couple of chapters threw me off. How may I help you?" Blair and Chrona looked at each other and shrugged. "We're shopping for a friend. Do you have anything interesting for us?" asked Blair.

"Hmm. How old is the fellow?"

"He's turning...17...oh no."

Author's note: **My computer's acting up so I have to start another chapter continuing this adventure. XC...**


	6. Black Star part 2

Author's note: **Alright! Let's get back on track with Black*Star's birthday! Was buying the speakers the right thing to do? Will Chrona and Blair get a gift for Black*Star? Can Tsubaki earn the money? Will Kid still celibrate Black*Star's 17th birthday? Let's see!**

"What did you say? I'm celibrating a 17th birthday?" snapped Kid, after being told the news by Liz. "You're not gonna quit the stage are you?" asked Liz. "Yeah, it took all long and stuff." agreed Patty. "No. As badly as I want to, no. It wouldn't be fair on you and your hard work. Everyone elses too. Besides, I owe this to Black*Star. He saved my life. He caught that saw, preventing it from cutting me." said Kid.

_"It's a good thing I came. You would've been ripped to shreds. I saved your life! Yahoo!"_

_- Black*Star_

"But, Kid, wouldn't it have been better for him to catch you?" asked Patty.

"You and Liz broke my fall."

"But wouldn't it take more than a saw to kill you?" asked Liz.

"Dammit! I said that I owed it to him! Now let me work!"

After Soul and Maka checked the speakers to make sure they work, which woke up just about the entire neighborhood, they were ready to give them to Kid. Plus, they just wanted to check on him to see how he was doing.

On their way there, Marie walked past them. "Soul? Maka? What are you doing with my speakers?" she asked. "What? These are yours?" asked Soul. Marie started crying. "How could you? I feel so betrayed!" Soul and Maka blushed in embarassment. "We're sorry, Miss Marie. We didn't know these were your speakers." said Maka. "But since when do you steal? It's horrible! You two are better than this!" cried Marie. "We don't steal." said Soul. "Then what are you doing with my speakers?" asked Marie.

"We bought them from some guy with a big jacket on. I told Soul not to buy them but he wouldn't listen to me." Maka explained. "That's not what happened! You agreed with me!" yelled Soul. "We had no choice!" whined Maka. "Why did you even want speakers?" asked Marie. "Kid's building a stage for Black*Star's birthday. He needs speakers for it so he asked us for asistance." Maka explained. "Oh. So you two aren't up to anything." said Marie, finally coming to a conclusion. "Uh, Yeah! Did you really think we would purposly steal from sombody?" snapped Soul. Marie blushed.

"Sorry. I shouldn't acuse you of things like that. You know better. You can keep the speakers. I'm sorry for the misunderstanding. They were starting to annoy Stein anyway. Maybe if I keep him satisfied he might become closer to being my husband." she said. "Your...what?" said Soul and Maka in body launguge. "Oh...um...don't tell Stein! Please!" yelled Marie. "Yeah, okay, Miss Marie." said Maka. "Yeah, sure, whatever." said Soul.

"Toys? Candy? Ballons?" asked the man at the shop. "Um, sir, he's turning 17 years old. I don't think he'll be interested in any of this stuff. This stuff bores me. There's no yarn in the toy section." said Blair and then whining. "Hmm. Action figures? Sour drops? Water ballons?" asked the man. Blair didn't answer. She just sighed. There was obviouly nothing here for Black*Star. "What about that assissin outfit? Black*Star would like that." suggested Chrona. "It's not like he's gonna wear it, you idiot!" snapped Ragnarok. "No, it's perfect! That will do!" said Blair. "Great! $20 please!" said the man.

"Thanks for the money!" said Tsubaki as she walked away from the trio. "Sure thing, kid! Anything to keep you the hell away from my group!" the leader responded. "They were very nice. Good. Now all I have to do is buy the belt and curtain. Now...what color did Kid say?" thought Tsubaki.

"Wow. I'm very impressed, girls. We're almost finished. The only thing we have to do now is cut off that damn millimeter. It's been urking me the whole time. Now is my chance to get rid of it! Get me the ladder! That sucker's coming down!" said Kid. He once again climbed up the ladder to cut off the millimeter.

He cut it nicley and he took his time until all his friends busted in the door talking about what happened all at once. It threw Kid off so he fell off but this time, Liz and Patty didn't break his fall. He fell into a stack of wood. "Kid! Are you okay?" asked Liz as she bolted to him along with everyone else.

Kid slowly opened his eyes as everyone came to check on him. "Millimeters...millimeters are everywhere..." he muttered. "Kid? Kid, are you alright?" Liz asked again. "MILLIMETERS! I have to cut them off!" Kid snapped as he picked up the fallen saw to cut the "millimeters" which were really his friends. "What the hell are you talking about? We're not millimeters!" snapped Soul. Liz and Patty just stood there, watching their friends being chased by the sudden chain saw mascure.

"Think it's time to snap him out of it, Patty?" asked Liz. "Uh huh!" Patty went into her weapon form and Liz threw her to knock the saw out of Kid's hand and then she ran to him and punched really hard in the face. "I always wanted to do that. It's so fun." said Liz.

"Wha-what happened?" asked Kid as he looked up at the millimeter at the top of the stage. "Why is there only half of a millimeter up there? If there's gonna be a half up there there has to be another half or nothing at all!" Liz grabbed him by the head with one hand in both sides. "Kid, it's okay. You were cutting off the millimeter but your friends came in and startled you. Okay?" she explained. Kid nodded.

"So, what are your results?" he asked. "Me and Soul got the speakers for the stage. It turned out they were Marie's but she let us have them anyway." Maka reported. "Yeah, she wants Stein to be her hub." laughed Soul. "We got an assassin suit for him." said Blair. "I have the belt and curtain, even though it took a while to get the money." said Tsubaki.

"Wait, it's purple. It's purple! Why is it purple?" asked Kid. "Isn't that what you wanted?" asked Tsubaki. "No! I said blue, dammit! Dark blue! Where'd you get the idea of purple?" Tsubaki shrugged. "I told you it took a while to get the money." Kid sighed. "Oh well, it will do. At least it's close. Good work, everyone! Black*Star will be just as satified as I am! I appreciate your help! I just might pay you!" he annouced as everyone cheered at the end of the speech.

It was Black*Star's birthday. Everyone was set for the big surprize. Kid seemed a bit upset though. Something was telling him not to be the one to bring Black*Star to the party, but he went anyway.

"Hi, Black*Star." said Kid as he walked to him. "5,456, 5,457, 5,458..." Of couse this was Black*Star counting his push-ups. "Black*Star, do you have a moment?" asked Kid. "5,461, 5,462, 5,463..." Black*Star continued. "I just want to show you something." said Kid. "5,467, 5,468, 5,469..." Black*Star went on. Kid sighed. "I was hoping it wouldn't have to come to this...you know, Black*Star, I really think all those huge numbers you're saying aren't real. You just wish that's as far as you got. You would've passed out by now. You're not strong enough for that many push-ups."

"Shut up!" yelled Black*Star as he tried to punch Kid. "So it starts..." said Kid as he ran off before Black*Star called out a challenge. "Hey! You can't just run off like that!" yelled Black*Star. "Dammit. I _can't_ run off like this. I have to fight. I can't resist." thought Kid.

"You better have a good explanation for interuting my push -ups." said Black*Star. "I just want to show you something. Just follow me intead on starting a fight. You can finish your push-ups afterwards." Kid explained. "Hell no! It won't be the same. I'll have to start all over again thanks to you."

"It's okay, Black*Star. You'll forgive me after I show you."

"Just tell me so I can start!"

"Then I'd be ruining the surprize. Besides, telling you wouldn't be the same as showing you."

"I don't care!" Black*Star threw another punch but Kid counter-attacked him. He was tempted to fight now. "That's what I'm talking about!" yelled Black*Star, noticing his urge to fight. "Remember: fight toward the direction of the garage. Do not fight in one place. Make it move without running away." thought Kid.

"Soul wave!" Black*Star hit Kid with a soul wave unexpectingly. "Whoa. Is he really that mad?" he thought. "Maybe I said too much." Black*Star agressivly threw another punch at Kid as he rolled away.

"Get back here you fulse reeper!" yelled Black*Star. "What did you call me?" Kid angrily asked. "Fulse...reeper!" Kid angrily threw a strong punch to Black*Star. Now they were both the same amount of mad.

"I'm bored." whined Patty, back at the garage. "Yeah, me too. I wonder what Kid's up to." said Soul. "He's probably on his way, not unless he's trying to pick a fight with him. Kid can't resist a fight." said Liz. "Uh oh. He probably is." said Maka. "No. There's no reason for them to fight. They'll be here." said Tsubaki, not excactly sure about her coment.

Kid was beating the crap out of Black*Star after he threw another sudden soul wave. He finally realized that they were standing in one spot fighting now. He was supposed to attract him the garage but it was hard to do that when your beating somebody to a pulp.

"Black*Star, this isn't getting anywhere. Just let me take you to that thing I wanted to show you." said Kid. "You're lying!" yelled Black*Star as he hit Kid with another soul wave. "Dammit! Why does he keep doing that? Is it because he doesn't have his weapon?" Kid thought, actually starting to get scared. (this is where Kid goes OOC. You know he wouldn't be scared of Black*Star no matter what.)

"I'm not gonna listen to you! You're probably trying to get the best of me and throw a huge attack on me!" snapped Black*Star. "I'm serious! It's for your-" Black*Star didn't let him talk. He was about to admit it was for his birthday but he hit him with another soul wave. "That's it! I can't let him beat me!" thought Kid.

"Liz, Patty, do you think you should go check on Kid?" asked Tsubaki. "No. He might come and we won't be here." Liz answered. "Kid sure is taking a long time. I hope he's okay." said Soul.

Kid was on the ground. Black*Star was constantly throwing soul waves now. The count was now 5. He hit Kid 5 times. "This...isn't right. I never lose to that idiot..." thought Kid, spitting up blood. "I have to try harder...but if I do...will he kill me?" Kid slowly got up to his feet but Black*Star kicked him down. Kid kicked him off of him and he ran off quickly. "Hey! Get back here!" yelled Black*Star. Kid summoned his skateboard to move faster. He had to get Black*Star to the stage before things got really bad.

"Speed star!" Black*Star caught up to him and soul waved him off of the board. Kid was hopless at this point. He had to get away. He struggeled to get back on the board but Black*Star kicked him back off. "Black*Star...can't you see what you're doing?" asked Kid, feeling like an old man. "Yeah, I'm kicking your ass for once." Black*Star responded. Kid tried to get back on the board but Black*Star kept kicking him off. Kid was starting to pass out but he couldn't show anymore weakness from what he was showing now. He finally got back on the skateboard without Black*Star kicking him off and flew off.

"Don't run now!" Black*Star shouted, chasing after him. "Almost there!" Kid thought out loud. "Speed star!" Kid tried to rush faster to the garage to avoid Black*Star until he was finally there. The door wasn't open. Kid was terrified. He started banging on the door. "Guys! Open the door! He's gonna kill me!" he cried. "Soul wave!" Kid looked behind him and noticed Black*Star pulling another soul wave. "NO!"

Black*Star broke the door down hitting Kid with the soul wave. Kid was out cold. "Nice aprouch Kid." said Liz before she noticed how badly her meister was hurt. Blood was all over him. "Kid? Are you okay?" No answer. "Kid?" Still no response. "Kid!" Black*Star was just laughing. "Oh my god! Black*Star, I think you killed him!" Soul freaked. "Alright! I killed Kid on my birthday! Yahoo! I'm the best!" cheered Black*Star. "That's not a good thing anymore! He's your friend!" yelled Soul. "I thought you just saved his life not too long ago. Now you took it." said Liz. "What were you even fighting about?" asked Tsubaki.

Black*Star's face straightened. He forgot. He was just at the point where he wanted to win, and ended up killing his friend. He started to feel bad. He fell on his knees and picked up Kid as his dead head hung over. *A big heaven light flashing over Kid*

"Kid? Speak to me, pal." cried Black*Star. "Black...Star..." started Kid. "Yes?" Kid suddenly rose up and started choking Black*Star. "You killed me with 7 soul waves, you asswhole!" he snapped. "W-what?" asked Black*Star in confusion. "You killed me with 7 soul waves instead of 8! Why did you stop at 7?"

"You were dead by time I got to 7."

"Why didnn't you just hit me again for the occasion?"

"I don't know! I was starting to feel bad after I killed you."

"He killed you and all you care about is that he killed you with 7 soul waves?" asked Soul. "He's a nutcase!" said Maka. "You're seriosly insane!" snapped Liz.

"Well happy Birthday, bastard, I build you a stage. Enjoy it today while you have the chance 'cause your gonna die tomarrow." said Kid as he started to walk away. "Wait, how did you survive 7 soul waves?" asked Liz. "I'm a god. Gods die once and then they're immortal." Kid explained. "But there's one more thing I owe to Black*Star before I leave: birthday hits! I'll hit him 18 times to avoid 7..." Black*Star gulped and braced himself for 18 hits of serious pain.

Author's note: **I hope I didn't scare you when I killed Kid. The original plan was that Black*Star would kill him with 8 soul waves so that Kid would forgive him for killing him, but since I wouldn't forgive him for killing Kid I changed it to this plot. Feel free to request anything. Review?**


	7. Epilouqe

Author's note: **This is just a random thing I came up with during school. After this I will continue.**

This is our song  
>It's called "The Epilouqe"<br>Tells you the things  
>that have been going on<p>

La da da da  
>Epilouqe<br>Soul!

Kid: Soul rode the motorcycle  
>like I told him<br>The pumpkin had rotted as it had got older

All: Pissed off Black Star  
>He broke up the guitar<br>But he has his piano  
>to rock hard<p>

La da da da  
>Epilouge<br>Chrona!

Kid: He appreciated  
>the gift that we gave him.<br>Got the sex change,  
>the plan that he created<p>

All: Now he's boy  
>just like he was before<br>Hopefully,  
>it won't happen no more<p>

La da da da  
>Epilouqe<br>Kid!

Kid: I moved to the mountain  
>that my dad had founded<br>but for taking his money,  
>I got grounded.<p>

All: But it was no big "D"  
>He had his symmetry<p>

Kid: One of the best things  
>that have happened to me.<p>

La da da da  
>Epilouqe<br>Tsubaki!

Kid: She's still in love with me  
>as you can see.<br>Tried to explain  
>but she still disagrees<p>

All: It was sad  
>cause when Black Star got mad<br>he and Kid had fought  
>and that went bad.<p>

La da da da  
>Epilouque<br>Black Star!

Kid: I have killed him  
>on the next day<br>and I'm still immortal  
>to this very day<p>

All: Had to bring him back  
>the show was thrown off track<br>but it didn't change a thing.  
>Black Star is still an a-<p>

La da da da  
>Epilouqe<br>3!

Kid: Son apoligized  
>for not realizing<br>I would never forget  
>him in his life<p>

All: Spirit got burned  
>and yes, he also learned<br>that adults can also get  
>badly injured<p>

La da da da  
>Kid seems pissed off<br>Better end the song  
>before things go wrong<p>

La da da da da  
>Da da da da da da<br>La da da da da  
>Da da la da da da...<p>

Author's note: **And now back to our original program! Review?**


	8. 3

Author's note: **Back in buisness! Kid is alive! YAY! Next request was...3! An OC from my story, "Death 3" Feel free to read it after this chapter. It might not be as funny because I am simply being lazy right now. I keep trying to do this after school and homework and it is absolutly tiring. Enjoy!**

Death 3 was feeling upset. He just layed in his room all day, well, Kid's room anyway. It was his turn to be on the roof. "Hey 3, are you okay?" asked Liz. "No. My birthday is coming up. I'm gonna leave my perfect age." said 3. "It's okay, 3. You're only turning 9 in the state of mind. You're really turning 1 years old. 1 is symmetrical, right?" said Liz, knowing what to say from working with Kid all the time. "I guess that's true." 3 agreed. "Just don't tell Kid that. He'll get jealous."

Meanwhile, Kid was scowling on the roof. "Dammit! It's just not fair! He'll never meet an agonizing year caused by his age. If he's 7 in real life, he's 18 in the state of mind! If he's 17 in the state of mind, he's 6 in real life! An even number! That's not fair!" he whined.

"Stop scowling up there!" yelled a lady walking past the house. "Hey! Can't you see we're having symmetrical problems?" snapped Kid. The lady just kept walking. That sentance didn't make any type of sense. "That's what I thought!" 3 came outside to see what his dad was up to.

"Dad! What are you doing up there?" asked 3. "Have you already forgoten that's it's my turn to be on the roof?" asked Kid. "No, it's just that I thought I heard you yelling." Kid shook his head. "Nope. That wasn't me." He was obviouly lying. He didn't want to embarass himself by telling him that he was jealous of his 7-avoided ages.

"Come off the roof. It's time for school." said Liz. Kid jumped from the roof and walked to school. "This class is _boring_." whined one of the students, extending the last word. "I'm gonna _die_!" Kid randomly yelled, doing the same at the last word. "This looks like fun. I think I'm gonna _join_!" yelled 3 for the fun of it. "Shut _up_!" yelled Maka. "I'm Black*_Star_!" yelled Black*Star. "Everybody, be_ quiet_!" yelled Stein, who was sadly tired and annoyed by the chatter.

"Excuse me, why aren't you doing anything?" asked Maka. "I'm tired, dammit! And you guys want to scream and do crazy stuff like that!" snapped Stein. Everyone just looked at each other and shrugged. "So...are we getting the day off or something?" asked Maka. "Hell no! Study! Read! Do something!" yelled Stein, wanting to shut Maka up.

"Great. He's tired today. Maybe we can talk a bit." said Kid. "Why would you say that? Is there something you want to discuss?" asked Tsubaki. Before Kid could answer, Dr. Stein told them not to even think about it. Kid sighed and plopped his head on his desk. "We're not even doing anything today!" he thought.

It wasn't long before Stein hopless fell asleep on his desk so hard that big bolt in his head almost fell off. "Isn't that nice? We found out why he keeps twisting that thing." said Soul, followed by laughter. "So what did you want to discuss?" asked Tsubaki. "It's about 3. His birthday is coming up. It's his first birthday so we should make it extra special for him. He's into science so we should make a little something like...a_** scientifically symmetrical blast**_." said Kid.

Stein jumped up in excitment so quickly, his bolt almost slid completly out of his head. He pushed it back in and started twisting it as he screamed, "Did you say scientifically symmetrical blast?" Kid froze up. He didn't know if he was in trouble or not. "Um...yeah?" he whimpered. "That sounds amazing! What ever the hell you guys are working on, can I join?" asked Stein Kid shrugged. "Dad, why did you tell me about your little project?" asked 3. "You're too young for it, son." said Kid. 3 looked at him suspiciously.

"What's he up to? Why would he let Stein in it out of all people?" he thought. (Now who does that sound like?) After school ended, 3 went to Kid with many questions. "Dad, could you at least tell me what you're up to?" asked 3. "You know, you should stay in a kids' world." said Kid, acting like his dad when he asked him a question. "You're avoiding my question!" snapped 3. (Must I ask again?)

"It's a very special project." said Kid.

"Dad! What is it? What is the project? Why is Stein in it?" demanded 3.

"It's too dangerous for children." Kid teased.

"_You're _still a child!"

"So are you, but your much smaller. Not only are you 8 in the state of mind, but in real life your a newborn."

"Dad, that's embarassing! Stop beating around the bush! Tell what you're up to!"

"Ah, 'beating around the bush'! When did you learn that phrase?"

"Dad! You're not answering me!"

"Then you should stop asking." 3 did as he was told and sighed. There really wasn't a point to asking anymore. His dad was just going to keep him wondering. "That's actually pretty fun. Now I see why my dad hid things the way he did, but why the important stuff? I better not start." thought Kid.

Kid and his son went home. 3 asked what Kid was up to again. "Do you really want to know?" asked Kid. 3 nodded. "Do the dishes tonight and I will make sure you know." 3 ran inside to wash the dishes while Kid called his friends to his house. They all discussed what they were going to do in the back.

"I'm kind of glad you were able to join, Stein. I didn't know how to pull off something scientific." said Kid. "What symmetrical image do you want? A body or something?" asked Stein. "Um...no. That's something _you _would like." said Kid, freaked out a bit. "I don't really know. Maybe a symmetrical version of 3?" he suggested. "Knowing you and 3, that would depress him." Liz pointed out. "That is true." agreed Soul. "Maybe would could enlarge 3." suggested Maka. "What?" snapped Kid, even more freaked out now. "Are you trying to fatten my son or something?"

"NO! I mean, the _number_ 3." Maka straightened. "Where's the science in that?" asked Soul. "Maybe we could make a huge neon sign! We could let him know it was _my_ idea! Yahoo!" yelled Black*Star. "That's a good idea, Black*Star." said Tsubaki. "Of course it is! It came from me!"

3 burst out the back door. "Dad! I washed the dishes! Now will you tell me?" he yelled. "Why don't you clean your room? Then I'll tell you." said Kid. "But Dad, it's your room and it's always clean." said 3. "I believe that one." said Soul. "Who doesn't?" Maka pointed out. "Just...um...make it cleaner. I might have something out of place." said Kid. "But if you did, you wouldn't be comfortable with that." 3 remarked. "Does he know his dad or what?" laughed Stein. "I'm comfortable right now because_ you _are going to check it for me." said Kid. 3 sighed sadly and walked back inside the house to excamine his dad's room.

"Okay. I guess we're going with the neon sign?" asked Kid, making sure he got everyone's vote. "Maybe we can enlarge it with fireworks." suggested Soul. Everyone thought about it out loud with instant chattering. "So...is that the big plan?" asked Kid. "No way! We have to go with my idea! It's awsome because it's mine!" snapped Black*Star. "Maybe we could enlarge it with some type of liquid." suggested Tsubaki. "How is that possible?" asked Kid. "Maybe we could experiment with it." said Stein. "Maybe..." said Maka. "Why not all in one?" suggested Kid. "That's insane!" freaked Soul. "That's amazing!" screamed Stein.

3 burst out the house again. "Dad! There's nothing wrong with the room! Will you tell me now?" he asked. "Why don't you take out the trash? Then I'll tell you." said Kid. "But Dad-"

"Trash first." repeated Kid. 3 moped back inside to take out the garbage. "How long are you going to keep that up? In your perfect house, there can't possibly be too many chores to do." said Maka. "As long as I can. So which plan are we going with?" asked Kid. "Mine, of course!" yelled Black Star. "I wanna go with your plan." said Soul. "So do I. That's a true experiment. How do we do it?" asked Stein. "I don't know. In some type of machine?" guessed Kid.

3 burst through the door again. "Dad! I took out the garbage! Now will you tell me?" he asked. "Why don't you go polish the paintings in the house? Then I'll tell you." said Kid. "Aw man..." 3 slowly walked back in the house to start polishing the paintings.

"The machine sounds like a good idea. Now, what will be the actions of the machine? And who will pay for the material?" asked Stein. "3!" yelled Kid. 3 busted out the door. "I was just about finished polishing the paintings! Will you tell me now?" asked his son. "Why don't you fetch my sketch paper? Then I'll tell you." Kid assured. 3 ran inside and came back out with the paper. "Now?" he asked. "Um...why don't you vaccume the floors? I don't want any hidden grit ruining the symmetry of my home. Then I'll tell you." said Kid. 3 rolled his eyes. "Dad, are really going to tell me, or are you just going to keep blocking me with another chore?"

"I'll tell you. Just vaccum the floors first."

"Dammit..."

3 trotted back inside the house while Kid drew a sketch of the creation he came up with.

"That doesn't seem bad at all Kid. It's...perfect." said Maka. "Perfect is the way I like it. Here's the plan: As I have been through this entire fanfic so far, I will be paying for this. When I give off the proper amount of money, Soul and Maka will collect the fireworks for the board. Black Star and Tsubaki will collect the board and wires. I will collect the gasoline. There will automatically be fire so Pro. Stein will put the pieces together. When my son falls asleep, we will go out to test the project and if it works, then will put it together a second time for 3. Is that understood?" said Kid. Everyone nodded. "Good. I'm going to give out the money tomarrow if that's okay with you, Stein." He nodded in excitment. His days of teaching has payed off.

3 burst out the door again. "Dad! The vaccume blew up!" he hollarded. Kid ran inside to help his son clean up the mess and make the house symmetrical again.

The next day, Kid managed to get the money from his dad, even though it caused him a year without money. (Kid had to get a job after this chapter which might be included in the next) After class he gave it out which made 3 even more supicious.

"_You're too young for it, son..._"said 3 in his head, thinking of what his dad said to him the first time he asked about the project. "He said I'm too young for it, he let Stein in it. He keeps distracting me, he needed sketch paper and now he's giving them money. Oh no! Is he paying them for something? Something evil? Stealing? Killing? What is he up to?"

Soul and Maka went to buy the fireworks at the store. They weren't selling any because it wasn't that time of year anymore. The owner told them that there was only one more place to find it and that was were Kid's symmetrical mountain was. (Last seen in chapter 3)

Soul rode his motorcycle from the first chapter up to the mountain. There stood a store that looked very strange, yet fimiliar. Spirit was there...as the owner. "Hi Maka! How are you, my sweet daughter?" he yelled obviously happy to see her. "Papa? What are you doing here?" asked Maka, not feeling the same for his apearence. "Lord Death wanted me to keep watch of Kid to see if he came here and seen his gift. That mountain is symmetrical from the inside and out. Kid wanted his father out the way of his birthday so he built it to change his mind. I haven't seen him yet, and it's past his birthday. It's getting boring up here. Luckily I have Kid's mountain to stay in. There's even a bathroom in it! So what do you need, my darling?"

"Well, since you are up here, do you have any fireworks?" asked Maka. "Of course I do, sweetheart! I have plenty! You don't even have to pay for them! It's all free, just for you, my darling, Maka!" yelled Spirit. "Papa! Cut it out! You're embarrassing me!" Spirit took out the fireworks and handed them to Maka. "Do you need me to come home and light them for you? I don't want you to get hurt." Maka rolled her eyes. "No, Papa. It's okay. Kid has this-"

"Kid! I can't let him get burned! Lord Death would kill me!"

"That's not what I meant-"

"He could get burned up really bad! He could lose his hand! If he loses his hand he'll want the other one off! He could get his face burned too! He could get his head blown off! Oh my god! The same things could happen to you, Maka! NO! Give them back! I can't let you get hurt!"

"PAPA! I'M NOT THE ONE LIGHTING THE FIREWORKS! STEIN IS!"

"What does Stein have to do with it?"

"Kid's doing a huge project for his son's first birthday. He involved Stein to help him."

"You better let me join too. He might try something."

"Are you sure? With you in the project, he might want to cut you open again."

"Nope! I'm not going to sleep. I will be awake at all times!"

"Um-but-"

"It's too late. Your crazy dad's not gonna back down, but he will come down to Kid's house to help out." said Soul. "But before we go, we should take a look at the mountain."

Black Star and Tsubaki were trying to build a board of their own. They were trying to make it fire proof and caught everything on fire. So they had to go to a different location and try it with plastic. The same results appeared. They tried again with metal and...that was just...horrible. The first place they tried wood was at the bar Blair worked at. The second time, was in front of the acadamy (Thank goodness it wasn't _at_ the acadamy) The third place was at Stein's apartment and that defiatly didn't go so well. They completly burned down the entire building while Stein was gathering tools for the project and Marie's ass was holding on to him the whole time as if he were supposed to do something about it.

Things were not going so well and 3 was supecting a murder plan so far. Kid was getting highly frustrated with the gasoline. The jug had a leak at the bottom and was dripping all over the place, ruining his symmetrical home, not to mention the gasoline bearly came off the carpet of the living room.

Finally, a few days before 3's birthday, things were coming into place. The stubborn Black Star finally decided to buy a fire proof board. Soul and Maka already had everything taken care of by day one and Kid finally got the gasoline up from the carpet. Now all they had to do was test it when Stein finished it.

That also didn't go so well. Stein had a few bugs in it and it blew up. Spirit had a three day panic attack and Kid got burned up just as he predicted. Luckily it was only his suit. 3 came outside to see what the big blow was and came to his third conclusion which was that they were trying to blow up a building.

The very day before 3's birthday, The project was finished. Everything was ready. 3 was completly depresed because he thought that his dad forgot about his birthday for a crime he and his friends were ready to comit.

"Dad, will you please tell me what you guys are up to?" asked 3 the next day. "Sure. I'll tell you tonight." said Kid. 3's eyes widened. His dad didn't ask him for any favors to blow him off. He was actually going to tell him what was up. "What? Really? But you- you- you kept blowing me off and keeping me wondering and- and- you wouldn't tell me no matter what- and- and- and- you were all secret and stuff- and- and-and- now your just going to tell me?" snapped 3. "Yes- yes- yes- I am and- and- and- you better calm down before I change my mind- mind- mind." said Kid.

That night, everyone set up the machine for 3 and the son was very excited. "Son, I am going to tell you that the project we were working on was for your birthday." said Kid, patted on his son's little head. 3 looked up and smiled at his dad. "Really? What did you get for me?" he asked. "Look."

Spirit lit up the fuse to the machine, but it didn't light up. It was dark so he had to take a closer look and then the thing lit up in his face and it burned it. He ran around all over the place and passed out while 3 watched the line of spilled gasoline light up the fireworks. While they flew in the air to explode, the fire lit up a sigh saying:

**Happy 1st/9th Birthday!**

3 looked up and seen his named enlarged in the sky. It was a large number 3 and it was perfectly symmetrical. 3 ran to his dad and hugged him. "I love you, Dad." he said. "This made all the chores worth it."

Author's note: **Sorry the chapter wasn't the way it usually is with the lol moments with the shopping, planning and aftermath. Like I said squeezing this all in along with school can be very tiring so these chapters will only take longer and my be shorter but they will NOT be less funny. I can promise you that. Review?**


	9. Blair

Author's note: **Hopefully, this will be better than 3's birthday. I had to switch the last two chapters because 3 landed in the 7th chapter. That can't happen in a Kid fic. That's a really bad idea. Okay! Here we go! Blair's birthday! I am using Kid's job in this! Enjoy!**

Soul and Maka were very busy. Maka was studying for a test and Soul was polishing his bike. (The one Kid gave him.) Blair on the other hand was very bored. "Maka, will you play with me?" asked Blair, in her car form. "I'm studying right now. Maybe later, okay?" suggested Maka. "But you never finish studying." the cat whined. "Why don't you go talk to Soul?"

Blair walked outside to see Soul. She hopped on top of his head and looked down at his face. "Soul, will you play with me?" She asked. "When I'm finished with my bike. If I don't take care of it, Kid will kill me. Why don't you go talk to Chrona?" said Soul, polishing his bike faster to protect himself from Kid.

The little purple cat walked to Chrona and Ragnarok. He was sitting in the bed...as usual. She hopped on top of him and looked straight at him with her kitty eyes. "Chrona, will you-" Blair was interupted by Chrona's freaking out. She startled him. "Oh, it's just you." he said, realived. Then Ragnarok jumped out of his back and yelled, "Why are you still scared of everything? Haven't you figured out that your safe by now? You whimpy idiot!" Blair rolled her eyes. "Nevermind..." she muttered as she trotted out the house to see Black Star.

Blair walked to Black Star's place. "Black Star, will you play with me?" asked Blair, going in his face. "5,456, 5,457, 5,458..." he counted. "You're pretty strong to do that many push-ups." said Blair. "Yeah, I know. Aren't I awesome? 5,461, 5,462, 5,463..."

"Are push-ups fun?"

"Yeah, they're awsome, but not as awsome as I am. 5,467, 5,468, 5,469..."

"Can I try?"

"Sure, but don't expect to beat me. 5,473, 5,474, 5,475..."

Blair went into human form and crouched down to Black Star's position. She took one more look at him and started copying him. "5,480, 5,481, 5,482..." she counted, nearly mimicing Black Star. "Hey! You're doing it wrong! I did that many push-ups, not you. You have to start from the begining you crazy copy-cat." said Black Star as he continued his push-ups. "Oh. Okay! 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6...7...8...ugh. This is boring." she whined. "That's because your a girl. Not to mention you're a cat. Cat's are lazy." said Black Star as Blair scratched him across the room.

"Ow! Dammit! Now I'm gonna have to start over!" yelled Black Star, in serious pain. "Don't call me lazy! I am not lazy! I'll just play with Tsubaki instead!"

"Tsubaki's sick. She can't play."

"Aw..."

The sad cat walked to Kid's house. "I'm pretty sure he's busy too...what a boring birthday." she whined. (Oh yeah, it's her birthday already. It's a one day chapter, folks.) She sadly scratched at Kid's door, but carefully also. If she scratched Kid's door...I think you know what.

Kid was in his bed, sleeping. "Kid, get up all ready!" snapped Liz. "I need a job. I not gonna have any money for a year. We need food." said Kid. "Why does that matter to you? It's not like you ever eat anything. And thanks to you our stomachs work like yours now." Liz pointed out. "Yeah, you're right. What about stuff like soap or toilet paper?" asked Kid. "That's resonable. Let's look for a job then."

Kid and his weapons went outside, not noticing Blair's presence. She started crying because it seemed nobody noticed her or her birthday. "What's that noise?" wondered Kid as he turned around to look.

"Blair? What's the matter?" he asked. "It's my birthday and nobody wants to play with me!" she cried. "I didn't know it was your birthday. Why didn't you tell anybody before it came up?"

"I did! Nobody remembered!"

"Happy Birthday!" yelled Patty. "I think it's a bit late for that, Patty." said Liz. Kid picked Blair up and pat her head. "I was going out to find a job. Want to take a walk with me?" he asked. "Sure! Thank you!" she yelled, going into human form and kissing him on the forehead. "Ahh! Cut it out!" yelled Kid as he dropped her and spit up blood.

"Happy Birthday, Blair-" yelled Maka, pulling out a huge present, but Blair was nowhere to be found. She was gone. "Hey, Blair I-" said Soul as he also walked in with a gift. "Where's Blair?" asked Chrona as he also walked in. "Yeah! Where is that nude-obsessed freak?" snapped Ragnarok. "I don't know. I hope she's okay." said Maka.

Kid Blair and the two pistols walked around to find a job. "I have an idea." said Liz. "Why don't we take Blair on a trip and see if we find any job opertunities on the way?" Kid thought a moment. "That sounds like a good idea, Liz. Where do we take her?" he asked. "The amusment park!" Patty exclaimed. "That sounds fun! Let's go there!" yelled Blair. "We need tickets, and I can not steal anymore money from my dad, plus I'm short on money myself." said Kid. "There's a carnival tonight and I can pay for it. I work at the bar. Maybe you could get a job there too." said Blair. "Good idea." said Kid.

The four walked to the bar, and saw Spirit there, drinking while rocking back and fourth with a bottle in his hand. "Blur! Happy Erv-day! I oughit was ur ay off." he babbled as they walked in. "Id! I er ooh ear? I idn't oh ooh rank! Er ad ould ee oh set!" Patty started laughing. "What the hell are you saying?" asked Kid. Spirit cleared his throat. "You shouldn't be drinking at young age."

"What are you talking about?"

"You're just trying to hide the fact of your habits."

"The what? Speak english, dammit!"

"Kid, it's no use. He's drunk." said Liz.

"I am not that word so oooh."

"Oh yeah, he's out of it." said Kid.

"Come on, let's meet the owner." suggested Blair. "I? I ooh ooh eed ooh ooh at?" asked Spirit. "Um...a job...?" whimpered Kid. "Do you see a** "help wanted" **sign anywhere?" he snapped. "Let's just slowly walk away..." suggested Liz as Spirit drank some more. "Before we do this, how often does he come here?" asked Kid. Blair shrugged. "He comes here when he's stressed."

"How often is he stressed?"

"Pretty often."

"Hell no. I'm not dealing with him all the time. That would stress _me_ out. Next please."

Blair leaded Kid to the store. "Why are you taking me here?" he asked. "Maybe we can get you a job here. You could be a casheir or something." said Blair. "Blair, you don't have to-" Kid started as Blair grabbed his arm and pulled him inside.

Meanwhile Soul and Maka looked around for Blair. They looked at the bar to see if it was her working hours. Yes, Spirit was still there, hopelessly drunk.

"Papa!" yelled Maka. "That explains why your dad's so damn crazy." said Soul. "Aka! I eety! Ut er oh ooing er?" he babbled. "What? Papa, are you drunk?" asked Maka. "Oh! Ma ot unk!" he babbled as he stopped to clear his throat. "Maka CHOP!" Maka hit him on the head and walked to the bartender.

"Hello, little girl. I can't give you anything unless you're 18 or older." said the bartender. "I don't want anything to drink. I just want to know if Blair is here." said Maka. "It's her birthday. She's off."

"Hey Maka!" yelled Spirit across the room. "You can hang over here with me!" He fell back and passed out with the bottle still in his hands. "That's why you shouldn't drink, little girl." said the bartender. "I agree. Thank you anyway, sir."

Kid didn't get the job. They were full on all the jobs he could've gotten down there. "We have McDeath's" said Blair. "No." said Kid.

"Well...what's a job you could get into?" wondered Blair. "He can be a teacher to teach about symmetry!" yelled Patty. "I don't think that will work, Patty. Kid didn't even graduate yet. Besides, he'll have to go to school for it and not only that, he has to teach more than symmetry, he has to teach other things like math and that contains 7." said Liz. "Oh..."

"I could be an artictech. That's a dream: making symmetrical buildings..." said Kid. "We might want to try something smaller right now." said Liz. "A fireman!" yelled Patty. "Hell no!" yelled Kid. "I don't think that fits Kid." said Liz. "A policeman!" yelled Patty. "A policeman? On top of fighting kishin? Yeah right-" started Kid as he thought a moment. "That just might work." said Kid. "You have to go to school for that too." said Liz. "Dammit!" snapped Kid. "Coloring!" yelled Patty. "What job involves drawing?" Liz asked her sister. Patty shrugged. "I wanna color."

"Is that fun to do?" asked Blair. "Uh huh!" Blair hopped around in excitment. "I wanna try! I wanna try!" she cheered. "Not now I-" Kid thought a moment. "Sure. Let's go and...color and stuff." said Kid. "What? Really?" asked Liz. "Yes, Liz, now let's go!" snapped Kid.

Meanwhile, Soul and Maka were looking for Blair in an alley way. "Let's check the dumpster." suggested Soul. "For as many baths she takes? Driving the water bill sky high? There's no way she'd be in there." Maka pointed out. "Oh well. Sucks to be you." said Soul as he hopped in the dumpster. Maka rolled her eyes and walked away. As she continued walking, she heard Soul's voice scream, "MAKA! HELP!" She turned around and found her weapon being picked up by a garbage truck. "I'm coming, Soul!" she screamed as she ran after the truck.

Kid let Blair and his weapons use a bit of his sketch paper to draw and color and he also drew, but he didn't color. "Why is he doing this? This isn't something he would do." thought Liz and she played around with the paper in front of her. "Kid, are you up to something?" she asked. Kid didn't answer. He just continued drawing.

Meanwhile, after Maka saved Soul from the garbage truck, the weapon and meister walked around looking for Blair and it was getting dark. "Hey, let's just take a break for now. She might have came back home." said Soul. Maka nodded and sat down in a random spot. Soul joined her. Suddenly, they heard the sound of Kid's voice screaming, "Pictures! Get your symmetrical pictures! Only $3.00!" Soul started laughing at the way he yelled, not even realizing it was Kid. "Soul...wasn't that Kid's voice?" asked Maka. "Kid wouldn't do something like that if he was drunk as your dad." Maka hit him in the head with a book that came out of absolutly nowhere. "Don't remind me of him!"

"Kid! I wanna ride the merry-go-round! Please? Please? Please?" asked Blair. "Sure. Go ahead. Just don't get lost." said Kid. "Kid, do we have to sell these pictures with you? I sort of wanna do something too." said Liz. "No. You don't have to stay here with me. I'm just gonna walk around the carnival selling pictures, if anybody comes up!" snapped Kid as he looked around for buyers. A little kid ran into him, laughing and pulling on the bottom of his shirt. "Hey! What the hell do you want?" he snapped as he shoved the kid off of him. The kid started crying. "I just wanted one of your pictures!" he whined. "Um...yeah. Good luck with that one." said Liz as her and Patty walked over to one of the rides. "We'll come back and check on ya!"

Kid looked down at the little child who was still crying. "Okay! You can have one of the pictures!" he yelled. The little boystopped crying and picked out the picture Kid drew. "$3.00 please." said Kid, trying to be nice. "I don't have any money." said the boy. "Then why'd you come here?" Kid rudly asked. The boy started crying again and ran away. "This is gonna be a long night..." sighed Kid.

Soul and Maka walked toward the carnival to see if Blair was there. They didn't see Kid, but they saw Liz and Patty. They were on a roller coaster. When they got off, they asked where Kid was. Liz said he was near the merry-go-round, but he already walked away. Suddenly, they heard yelling. "Get out of here, you damn cat!" yelled a man, as Blair ran out in her cat form with a bag of popcorn in her mouth.

She noticed Soul and Maka. "Hi, Soul! Hi Maka!" she yelled as she ran back to them in her human form. "Why are you here?" she asked. "We've beem looking for you." said Maka. "Why? You didn't even know it was my birthday today." said Blair. "Yes we did. We were going to celibrate it but you ran off." Soul explained. "Oh. Sorry about that. I went to Kid. He wasn't busy. I helped him get a job to cover the things he'll have to pay for and he gave me the best birthday ever. I was going to get him on the roller coasters after I finished my popcorn." said Blair. "Where is Kid anyway?"

"Help!" yelled Kid, as he was being arrested. "Kid, what did you do?" asked Liz as she and the others ran to him. "I don't know! I was just selling pictures and then this guy said I was ripping people off illegally!" said Kid. "Maybe you _shoud've_ been a policeman." said Blair. "It's okay sir, he's with us." said Liz. The man cuffed her and Patty too. "So_...you_ helped draw these terrible pictures?" he said. "Horrible pictures? What?" snapped Kid. "What's the matter with you? Drawing naked women and selling them to children!" snapped the man, showing them the picture. "That's not my drawing! It's not even symmetrical! Wait...is that Blair?" said Kid, taking a closer look and then quickly pulling back. "Oh my god! It_ is_!" he snapped. "Yep. You're under arrest." The man took Kid to his car. "I will have you know that I am Lord Death's son!" yelled Kid. "That's what _everyone_ says!" yelled the man, pointing to a row of people in tuxedos and stripes on their heads. "B-but _I'm_ the real one!" he yelled as he was being shoved in the car.

"Aw...poor Kid. I didn't get a chance to say thank you to him." whined Blair. "Don't worry, Lord Death will get him out of there...if he figures out." said Soul. "Blair, did _you_ draw that picture?" asked Maka. Blair nodded.

Kid just sat in the car and let the man take him away. "At least I have enough money for bale." he thought as he reached in his pocket to get it out. "Where's my money?" Kid looked out the window and saw the little boy he pissed off earlier with his stack of cash in his hand.

Author's note: **There you have it! The next one will be the one you've been waiting for...not telling! Tell me what you think...**


	10. Stein

Author's note: **This chapter was posted once before, but since I was told that it was lame, I re did it. I hope you will be satisfied. Dr. Stein! Here we go!**

The students were in class. Soul and Maka focused on Stein as he seemed to be working on something. They were only interested because they heard their names.

"Soul or Maka? Maybe Black Star." he muttered. "What is he talking about? Is it a special mission? An assignment? A lesson? That's it! It's a lesson! No. It would be taught to all of us. It must be a mission. Yeah! It's a special mission he's gonna assign to one of us. Heh. It's obviouly going to be assigned to me. I'm the best student." thought Maka.

"Kid!" yelled Stein. "What? But why would he pick Kid?" thought Maka. "Yes sir?" asked Kid. "Oh...uh, sorry. Nothing. It's nothing." Maka took a sigh of relive. "Ha! I knew he'd rather pick me."

"Black Star..." Stein started.

"What the hell? Black Star? Why would he pick Black Star out of all people? He would've been better off picking Kid!"

"I need you to occupy the class with your bragging. I need to go talk to Lord Death." Stein ordered. "Then why did you call my name?" asked Kid. "Um...I was going to pick you but you would just talk about symmetry and when I come back you'd get mad and all hell breaks lose."

"What's the difference? It would be the same thing with Black Star!" Kid pointed out. "I would pick Maka, but she would have nothing to talk about." said Stein. "Yes I would! Um...wanna hear about the new book I just got?" Maka whimpered as the class booed her off. "I got one! I just got a new bike from Kid on my birthday! Maybe I could bring it in and show it to ya!" yelled Soul. "Don't remind me of that! Do you know how much money I had to get from my dad that day?" snapped Kid.

"I don't think we could bring a vehicle inside the school anyway." said Stein. "Maybe you can bring in that piano I got you and play for everyone." suggested Kid. "Hell no! I hate playing the piano!" snapped Soul.

"Then why did you except the gift?"

"Because you flicked me off!"

"How do you flick someone off on their birthday?" asked Stein. "Don't act like you adults don't do it!" snapped Kid. "My question is, why did you even learn how to play?" said Maka. The statment silenced the room. Soul had no answer.

"So...anyway...Kid, you share a story on one of your missions and then Black Star you do the same. After him then Maka. By time she tells her story, I should be back." explained Stein.

Kid walked in front of the room. "I guess I'll tell you about that big mission I got back when I wasn't a student here." he annouced as the classroom cheered. They always wanted to know what happened that day. "Yeah! Tell us about your big faliar!" yelled Black Star. "But Black Star, the mission was marked complete, remember?" Soul pointed out.

"It was a perfectly symmetrical pyramid..." Kid started. Maka sighed and set her head on her desk. "...Me and my weapons were walking across the halls, which were symmetrical as well..." Kid continued.

Maka walked out the room to go to the restroom. She ran into her dad on the way. "Maka! Sweetheart!" he yelled. "What now? she growled. "I need to tell you something: Stay away from Stein." he ordered, pulling her close to him.

"Why?"

"It's his birthday tomarrow."

"And...?"

"He experiments on someone on his birthday every year. "If you're near him, he might pick you."

"Oh...so that's what he was working on. It's okay, he's gonna pick Kid. He blurred it out in clas today."

"Don't be too sure, he might change his mind and take my Maka!" Spirit snacthed her up and started swinging her back forth. Maka hit him with a book to release herself.

"Calm down, I said he's picking Kid."

"But he might cut you up instead! Not to mention he'll have to strip you to your underwear! That pervert!"

Maka shook her head and walked away(after hitting him with a book again).

Meanwhile, Stein went to the Death Room to talk to Lord Death about his plans to experiment on Kid.

"Lord Death, can I experiment on your son?" he asked. "What? Why would I let you do something like that to my Kiddo?" snapped Lord Death. "Well you know that little thing I do for my birthday every year..." said Stein.

"I'm sorry, but no can do! I won't let you cut him up for no good reason."

"Oh. Okay. Lord Death, can I experiment on you?"

"Listen, I understand you want to see the insides of a grim reeper, but you can't experiment on me. Why don't you go to Kid instead?"

"Sure. Thanks, Lord Death."

Stein walked out of the room, proud of himseld for outsmarting Death.

"Hmph! 'Experiment on me'! How silly!" thought Death. "Wait a minute..."

Death hopped over to Stein and stopped him in his tracks. "Hold on, slickster! I see what you did!"

"Why did it take you until I actually tricked you to figure that out?"

"Shut up. You can't experiment on him! Go pick someone else. Why don't you experiment on Maka or something?" Stein looked down in disappointment as Death hopped away. "Just one day..." he muttered. "I'll have to go back to my old self, back to where I didn't want gods. That way, I can get what I want."

Back in the classroom, it was Black Star's turn to tell the story.

"...And then, I chopped Mifune's head right off!" yelled Black Star. "Black Star, that didn't happen either!" yelled Tsubaki.

"Hey! I thought I told you: No interuting my story!"

"Um...may I ask a question?" asked Soul. "Sure. What is it?"

"If you cut off Mifune's head, then how is he a teacher at the acadamy?"

"Well, when I found out that the witch was a kid, I screwed his head back on so he can continue guarding her!"

"May I ask a question?" asked Kid. "What!"

"How was he still alive after you screwed on his head, leaving no scratches or stitches?"

"'Cause I'm just awsome like that! Now shut up! So after I cut off Mifune's head, the battle was won by me! The end!"

"So how did you find out the age of the witch?" asked Liz. "Um...after I killed Mifune-"

"Didn't you say he was still alive after you cut his head off?" Kid interupted.

"Look, I killed him and brought him back when I put his head back on!" snapped Black Star. "Anyway, after I killed Mifune, I opened the gate and-"

"How'd you open the gate?" Kid interupted once again. "Dammit, shut the hell up!" snapped Black Star as he jumped up and kicked Kid in the face. "Congrats, you finally managed to hit Kid." cracked Liz. "Of course I did! Afterall, I did cut of Mifune's head-"

Mifune walked past the room, listening to the lie. "If I recall, I kicked your ass." said Mifune. "Yeah, but I still managed to beat you!" Everyone looked at Tsubaki to see if she would say anything. She nodded her head. "It's true this time." she responded. "Thank you for finally backing me up." said Black Star.

Stein walked in the room. "Where's Maka? I need to talk to her." he said. "She went to the restroom, she should be back soon." said Soul. Maka walked in the room as Stein pushed her right back out. "Soul, come with me, Black Star, continue." he ordered.

"It's actually my turn." said Kid. "No it's not! I'm not done!" whined Black Star. "Your story isn't even true!" Kid pointed out. "Then why were you asking so many questions?"

"I was teasing you! Did you really think I would belive that you cut off Mifune's head?"

"Well, yeah. I'm just awsome like that, and you know it." Kid rolled his eyes.

As those two went on, Stein explained his issue with experimenting on Kid. "I need you to get him to my lab so I can take a quick look at his organs and sew him up before Lord Death finds out. This is your special mission." Stein explained. Soul and Maka nodded. Getting Kid shouldn't be too hard.

When the three walked in the room, Kid shot up Black Star. "Can I just kill him again?" he asked Liz and Patty. "Um..." muttered Liz. "Kid, you that a staff member has to watch you fight." said Stein. "Mifune's still here." Kid said as he pointed at the guardian standing in the corner. Stein nodded. "Okay, back to your seats. Black Star, can you move?" asked Stein. Black Star slowly got up and crawled to his seat.

"The bell's about to ring so I need you to sit down and be queit until it does." ordered Stein. "How are we going to get Kid?" Maka wondered out loud. "It'll be simple, Maka, just follow me." said Soul.

The next day, Kid was sitting down doing his work while Soul and Maka had a plan. "Okay, do you have it?" asked Soul. "Yeah, but should we really do something like this to Kid?" asked Maka. Soul shrugged.

Maka threw a puzzle box at Kid. He looked at the pieces on his desk and tried to resist putting it together. "It's just a puzzle. It's just a puzzle. It's just a puzzle." he repeated in his mind. He grabbed a piece of the puzzle and conneted it to another piece.

"Look! I got it right! They go together!" he cheered. "The puzzle must be completed!" He searched around for another piece to connect to the combined pair.

"Got him! Now all we need to do is wait for him to finish that puzzle and we'll lur him to the lab with the last piece!" Soul whispered to Maka. "But how long will that be?"

"Kid's the master. He'll have it finished within minutes."

Kid constantly connected the pieces as if he did this puzzle many times before. It wasn't long before he had the whole thing built. He took a sigh of relife. "I'm glad that's over with. Wait...there's a piece missing. No! No! No! There's a piece missing!" he snapped as he noticed the last piece sliding out the room.

"Come back here, dammit!" he yelled as he hopped from his desk and chased the piece. "Kid, what's going on?" asked Stein as he ran out the room. Stein shrugged. He figured it was Soul and Maka doing their work.

Kid chased the piece down the hall and soon summoned his skateboard to catch up with it. He grabbed the piece and pulled the string connected to it. He pulled Maka with a fishing pole all the way to him.

"Maka, you silly girl. How dare you try to take the last puzzle piece from me? Nice try. Next time, I will kick your ass." Kid took the piece off the string and walked away to finish the puzzle.

Maka sighed. "I thought he was going to kick my ass." she thought. "What happened? Are you okay? asked Soul. Maka nodded as she got up and brushed her skirt down. "Pretty sight." Soul muttered under his breath. "Maka CHOP!" (You know what that means)

"Ow! Dammit!" snapped Soul, rubbing his head. "What do we do now?" asked Maka. "Don't worry, I have another plan."

Later on that day, Soul and Maka used a symmetrical cat to catch Kid's attention. As they ran down the hall to place it in front of him, they ran into Spirit again. He picked Maka up and happily hugged her. "Maka! You're okay! I thought Stein was experimenting on you!" he cheered. She kicked him in the *nuts* since her arms couldn't reach a book.

She had to be the one catch Kid's attention because Soul was too bust laughing at Spirit. She set the cat down in front of the classroom where Kid could see it.

"Ooh! A perfectly symmetrical cat!" Kid cheered as he went to chase it. Maka set a bowl of milk in front of Stein's door to atract the cat and Kid there. Kid got to the door after knocking over everybody in the hall including Spirit and the laughing Soul.

The cat kneeled down to sip the milk as Kid pet it's head. "You're a perfectly symmetrical cat. Yes you are, yes are." Kid repeated. "Great, now I just have to Stein." thougt Maka. Soul and Spirit walked by.

"Maka, did you get Kid?" asked Soul. Maka nodded. "What do you need me for?" asked Kid as he walked by with the cat in his arms. "Um...it's nothing." whimpered Maka. "Why did you call my name then?" asked Kid. Maka shrugged and so did Kid.

"Look at this. It's a symmetrical cat! It's white with black paws, ears, and even a black tail with a spot on it's back which is also symmetrical!" he yelled. "Thank you for being so fond of me." said the cat, going into her human form.

"Look at that! She's symmetrical in her human form too!" snapped Kid as he fell to the floor and drooled in exciment along with Soul and Spirit.

"CHOP! CHOP! CHOP!" yelled Maka as she hit the three with a book. "Damn. So that's what a Maka chop feels like." said Kid. "You're lucky you'll only have to feel it once. She never hits you." said Soul. "Wait a minute...why do you always spear Kid's head?" asked Soul. "Because unlike you two, Kid knows how to respect women." said Maka.

"I do?" asked Kid. "He doesn't even know that he does! Besides, how do you know he hasn't been doing Liz and Patty latly?" snapped Soul, earning himself another hit on the head.

"I do have to say, that was kinda sick." said Kid. "But hey, you never know! It's the queit ones you always have to look out for! Just look at how nice he's dressed. He could be a pimp." said Soul as Maka hit him with a book again.

"I'd keep my mouth shut if I were you." said Kid. "Oh, shut up!" snapped Soul, once again getting knocked out by Maka. The bell rang. "Well, it's time for the missions. Cat, what's your name?" asked Kid. "MarryAnne." replied the feline. "Got a place to stay?" MarryAnne shook her head. "Come on" MarryAnne went back into her cat form and cheerfully hopped on his sholder. "Coming?" he asked. "Um...yeah, we'll meet you up there." said Maka.

"See what I mean? He's pimpn'." whispered Soul. "Maka CHOP!" Soul was on the floor bleeding. "You like him, don't you?" he asked. "No, not the way you think I do but...that has nothing to do with it!" snapped Maka. "Hey, MarryAnne." called Kid. "Yes?"

"Could you hop on my head instead? with you on one sholder, I'm unbalanced." Kid asked. MarryAnne hopped on his head as she was told and the reeper happily went on his way.

"Maka, if you get cut up by Stein, I will never leave you alone." Spirit told. "What? No!" Maka whined as her father walked away. "Dammit! The deal is even more serious now and Stein is gonna experiment on us if we don't get Kid for him. Come on, let's go pick a mission." said Soul.

After accomplishing another mission, the meister and weapon decided to display a trail of 8's on the floor, leading to Stein's door. Once the reeper gets to the door, he should be clear for surgery.

The weapon and meister set up the trap and waited for Kid as he walked down the hall. "Ooh! 8! 8! 8! Look at all these 8's! I wonder where they lead to." cheered Kid as he followed the trail.

"Ha! Shoe in! Rat trap! Piece of cake!" Soul chanted. Kid followed the 8 trail and noticed that the door that it lead to had a huge 7 on it. "Dammit!" he yelled as he punched a hole in the door. He punched it so hard that it opened up. Kid's arm was stuck so he swung with it. Soul and Maka appeared and trapped him in there as fast as they could.

"Yes! We got him!" Soul exclaimed. "Shut up! We don't want Kid to hear." ordered Maka. "Don't want me to hear what?" asked Kid at the hole he punched in. "Um..." Maka started, looking for another excuse. "What? Another name mix-up? What the hell is going on?" Kid demanded. "Nothing. Just stay in there it's a surprize." said Maka, nearly blowing it. "Hell no, I'm getting out of here because you two are up to something and I'm not getting into it." said Kid as he broke the rest of the door down.

The reeper walked away. The weapon and meister were left upset. The day was almost over, Stein's birthday was coming to pass and Kid's organs were still unseen. Stein was on his way to see them now.

"Oh my goodness, our lives are about to be ruined." cried Maka. "Don't worry, we can pull this off. All we have to do is force him in that room, but it's our only chance left." said Soul. "What's the plan?"

Kid was walking across the hall, minding his own buisness (well, thinking of Soul and Maka's buisness as well). Him, his weapons and his new pet cat were on their way to their last class of the day. "Liz, Patty, I need you to tranform." Kid ordered. "Why is that?" asked Liz. "I sense another soul around and it's up to no good. I can tell." Liz and Patty did as they were told and went into their weapon forms.

Suddenly, Maka flew down Kid's direction with the sythe in her hands. Kid didn't relize it was her at the time, but he did manage to shoot her. "Maka! Are you alright?" demaned Soul. "Yeah...it's just that that really hurt..." whined Maka. Kid turned around and notice who excatly he shot. He ran to her assitance and apoligized to her.

"Maka, what has gotten into you?" asked Kid. Maka sighed. "Kid..." she started. "Maka, don't!" Soul commanded. "We have no choice, Soul, it's over." Kid eyes widened. "Kid, you see, it's Stein's birthday...and, well, we've been trying to-"

Before she could continue and confess to Kid, Stein walked by, "Hello, Soul, Maka, Kid." he greeted. "Hello, Dr. Stein..." moaned Soul and Maka. "Happy Birthday, Stein!" Kid happily cheered. "Thank you. Kid, I actually needed to see you. It's very important. Come with me. The deal's in my lab." Stein ordered. Kid nodded. "Maka, are you sure you're alright?" he asked before he walked away. Maka blushed before answering. She started to feel bad for putting him through this, but if it ment keeping her dad away, then why the hell not. "Uh-huh. I'm fine." she whimpered, wanting to tell him what's going on. Kid nodded with a smile and walked away with Stein. The doctor turned to Maka and her weapon and winked in a way of saying, "Thank you."

"It's okay, Maka, it's not like he's gonna die. It's just surgery, he'll get over it." said Soul, trying to cheer Maka up. He seen the guilt in her eyes. Maka turned to him and gave him a week smile. "I guess you're right." she mummbled, not really agreeing.

Kid and Stein walked to the room. "See that door? It goes to my lab. In there, is an abnormal kishin. Weapons won't work on it. I was hoping if you could get him out of there. Can you do that for me?" asked Stein. "Sure." said the reeper as he boldly started to walk in the room. "Wait a minute! The kishin made it incredibly hot in there. You might want to take your shirt off." Stein informed him. "I go to the desert with a robe on. I'll be fine." said Kid. "No you won't. It's hotter than the desert." Kid rolled his eyes and took off his jacket, follow by his shirt. "I'll hold those for you." Stein offered. Kid nodded and walked in the room. "Perfect." Stein muttered to himself.

Kid walked in the room, prepared for the heat and the abnormal kishin. He seen nothing. "He set me up, didn't he?" thought Kid. "That's what those bastards were up to." As soon as Kid figured out the deal, Stein barged in the room and tackled him down to the table.

"AHHHH! I've been set up for rape! Help! Stein! You don't have to listen to the yaoi fans! I don't agree! Please help me!" cried Kid as Stein strapped him down. "It's not rape, it's my birthday. Every year on my birthday I pick someone to experiment on, and I picked you. Who doesn't want to see the insides on a grimm reeper?" Stein cackled, get out the tools for his work.

"Dammit, and the day seemed to be going so well, too. Oh well, at least I'll be asleep throught the whole thing. It'll be like it never happened." Kid thought outloud. "Actually, you'll be awake during this experiment. If I see anything stange or inhuman, you might be able to explain it to me." explained Stein. "Oh...uh, well at least he's a profesional." Kid informed himself. "Actually..."

"Oh, what now?"

"This is my first time working on a consious paitent."

"Oh...my...god...MAKA!"

Author's note: **Don't worry, Kid, you'll be alright the next chapter, I promise. If this didn't make you laugh, Thesimplelife, then I am sorry, but I don't know what else to do for you. Review?**


	11. Lord Death

**Author's note: Hiya! Hiya! I'm back! Sorry it took me so long to update. I've been depressed latey and it's been hard for me to work on fanfics or think of anything funny. I still am so it might be a little less funny than my previous chapters so just bear with me. (However that's supposed to be spelled...) Now let's roll up our sleves and get to work! ^.^!**

Kid was playing basketball with Liz, Patty, Soul, Black*Star and Tsubaki. It was Kid, Soul and Tsubaki against Liz, Patty and Black*Star. Kid was the captin of his team and Liz was the captin of her team. They were on punishment mode.

"Okay, Kid, if you lose, you'll have to coat yourself with mud and you're not allowed to take a shower or change your clothes for two days." said Black*Star. "No! It'll all dry up and it'll take forever to get off when my days are up!" Kid cried. "Excactly!" laughed Soul. "Fine, I'll just take my clothes off." Kid assured. "Whoa. Poor Liz and Patty. They have to see Kid naked for two days straight." giggled Soul. "I'd like to see that..." mumbled Tsubaki. "What?" asked Soul and Black*Star at the same time, looking at Tsubaki. "Nothing!" yelled Tsubaki, face-palming. "What about school?" asked Maka, who was sitting on the bench. "You're not gonna walk around in the nude at school are you?"

"I'll skip!" Kid blurted. "Soul and Black*Star do it all the time!"

"What? Walk around in the nude?" asked Liz.

"NO! Skip!" Kid cleared.

"At least we're inside the school when we do. If we want to come back, we're there." Soul pointed out.

"So? My dad will understand. I don't even have to the academy. I'm a reaper." Kid threw back.

"Then why do you attend?" asked Black*Star.

"Belive it or not, but you guys were an inspiration. I was watching you fight Stein."

"Whoa, wait. Did you say you were 'wathing' us?" asked Soul.

"Yes. I was watching you. You were doing poorly and as I was planning to save you, I decided to join the DWMA."

"You said you were coming to help? You never came. Where were you?" asked Maka.

"Kid forgot to fold the toliet paper so he refused to go anywhere." laughed Liz.

"Fold the toliet paper...?" said Tsubaki.

"A way to keep the house symmetrical." giggled Patty.

"Who can keep up with that? What do you do? Wipe your ass and fold the toliet paper?" asked Black*Star, almost laughing.

"Yes. I have to fold it neatly into a triangle." said Kid, as if it was some kind of skill.

"No coment." said Tsubaki, imagining how toliet paper can possibly be folded into a triangle.

"I got one. I feel queezy now that I know that Kid has the ability to watch us." said Soul with his eyes widening.

"I heard it was your own decision but...I didn't know all that." mumbled Black*Star.

"Yeah, I almost feel...violated." Maka added.

"You don't watch...much, do you?" asked Tsubaki.

"No. I watch missions with my dad every now and then." said Kid.

"I thought you could just contact Lord Death with that mirror. I didn't know you could...watch people!" snapped Maka.

"Girls, I'm not going to take a look at you naked or something! Let's just get on with the game!" cried Kid.

"Now I'm really scared..." whimpered Soul.

"We're not going to play now, are we?" asked Kid. Everyone shook their head. Kid shrugged. "Oh well, I'm busy anyway."

"Busy with what? A secreat panty raid?" asked Soul. Kid picked up the basketball and forced it into Soul's mouth. His sharp teeth made it pop and all the helium in the ball flew him to the basket. "Wow. Good shot, Kid." said Tsubaki, having nothing else to say. Kid shrugged and walked away. Liz and Patty followed.

"So, Kid, what's the big plan? Give the audience some excitment." asked Liz. "I'm going to give my dad a birthday party outside the academy. He can't stay out long, so it's going to be short. I'm going to need more help for this. Listen, both me and the author have been depressed lately and it's all because of those characters I was about to play basketball with. I'm getting them back."

"Ooh! Sounds interesting! How will you do so?"

"I'll ask Soul, Maka and Black*Star to help with this. I'll have extra help as well, but I'm not worried about them as I am Soul, Maka and Black*Star. While they are helping me with the project, I will get my revenge." Liz's eyes widened. She just felt like messing with somebody at the time.

Later on that day, Kid called his friends and told them about his plan for Death. They all came over his house for a meeting. Afterwards, Soul and Maka had to help train Kid. He wanted Death to think he was dead. Once he came out of the academy, Black*Star was to lead him to the party, there he would find his live son, stopping him from ruining it, using his new power. He simply asked Crona and Ragnarok to pass invitations. To keep him from having a spaz attack, he wanted Blair to go with him. Stein was to be taken on during the party.

(Here comes the good part!)

Crona and Blair were working on the invitations. Ragnarok was taking a nap...again. "This looks like fun!" cheered Blair, holding up a pair of scissors. "How do we do this?" asked Crona, picking with the paper and glitter. "Well, you just take this card and fold it. After that, you write stuff in it. In this case, you just write something like: Dear, so and so, your invited to Lord Death's surprize birthday party! Then you just write down all the information like where it is and stuff." Blair explained.

Crona nodded and folded a piece of paper diagonally. He took a look at Blair's card and seen it was folded vertically. He put his head down sadly. "That's...different." mumbled Blair, trying to cheer him up. "No, it's stupid! I hate it! No one folds a card diagonal-like-ish!" snapped Ragnarok, waking up. "I like it! We should fold them all like that!" cheered Blair, folding a card diagonally.

After Blair and Crona finished all the cards, they went out to give them away. They started with Stein.

"Hi, Dr. Stein!" cheered Blair. "Hey, Dr." whipered Crona, handing him the card. "What's this?" asked Stein. "Kid's hosting a big birthday party for his dad, and you're invited." Blair explained in a cheerful way. "I don't know. Kid's pretty mad at me right now. I'm surprized he even considered me." Blair shrugged. "Marie's invited too, if she wants to come." she mentioned. Stein just nodded and walked in the house. As they started to walk away, Marie jumped out. "You two are inviting me to a party?" she cheered. "Um...no, Kid is." whimpered Crona. "Yay! Tell him I said thank you!" Blair and Crona just slowly backed away.

Meanwhile, Soul and Maka were helping Kid train. "Alright, the new power is a sheild. I've been working on it since I came up with this." Kid annouced. "I need you two to attack me so I can bring it out."

"Are you sure about that?" asked Maka. "Possitive. Your best shot." Kid answered. "Okay then..."

Soul and Maka did as they were told and took their best shot at Kid. He tried to prepare the sheid, but it kept coming out no bigger than his hand. "Stop!" he yelled. It was too late. He was already hit. "Kid? Are you alright? Where are you?" asked Maka. Suddenly, the weapon and meister heard a whimper.

"Tsunaida...tamashii no hi ga...mune wo sasu nara..." Soul and Maka looked down and saw Kid, high on pain. He wasn't in his right mind. If he was, he wouldn't be singing "Resonance" with a big fat smile on his face. Soul and Maka looked at each other, shrugged and finished the song off with him.

"Kotoba yori motto yaoki hibiki ga...ima kakoeru ka..."

Black*Star and Tsubaki went to the store to get a nice and scary suit. That didn't go so well because Black Star hopped in and screamed, "As your god, I command you to get me the scariest suit here! I need it to assinate Death the Kid!" They all took him seriously. They thought he was really go to kill Kid. Well, actually, the only part they really heard was "kid" and in their heads, they thought he was going to kill a kid, not the actual Kid. So he was arrested.

Once that word got out, Kid had to stop his training to bail him out. He kicked his ass afterwards. (Yes, I'm rushing though this.) He wasn't comfortable with the idea, but he decided to let Black Star wear his robe. He promised him a murder if he ruined it.

Crona weren't doing so well with the invitations because Ragnarok kept screwing everything up and they only got three people to go: Stein, Spirit and Eibon. The rest seemed like they didn't even care.

Kid's sheild wasn't working so he tried a different move. He used it on Soul and Maka to get them back. He decided he'd use the trick to stop his dad at the surprize party. Everyone help set the decorations at the basketball court, althought it got blown up and caught on fire numerous of times.

It was time for the party. Everyone was ready. "All right, everyone, I just send Spirit out to warn my dad about the 'trouble' I'm in. Remember, stay as far away from the entrance as possible. Feel free to grab something to eat because my dad's not that big an eater." Kid annouced, neatly spreading fake blood on each cheek.

Meanwhile, Spirit ran to the Death Room to tell Lord Death the "news."

"Hiya, Spirit! What's up? Came to wish me a happy birthday?" asked Lord Death, waving that huge hand of his. "Um...I don't think your birthday will be so 'happy', sir. Your son's in trouble." said Spirit. "What? Where is he? Take me to him!" Death commanded.

"Here he comes!" yelled Black Star. Kid nodded and went into a choking position. Black Star had to act like he was choking him. "There he is, Sir." said Spirit in weapon form. "Dammit, not for real, Black Star." Kid tried to whisper. Black Star was getting a kick out of Kid's summision and it was killing Kid to be in that position. He was two seconds away from fighting back.

"Hey, you! Get away from my Kiddo!" snapped Death, using his real voice. "Run...Black Star..." Kid shruggled. Black Star turned around and noticed that Death was ready to kill. He ran off. At least the choking caused Kid to really put some feeling into this. He was gasping for breath and coughing contantly. Death went to check on him.

"Kid, did he really beat you up that badly? You're bleeding." asked Death, picking him up. "I...*cough* I'm fine..." Kid weakly responded. "Kid, please hang in there."

"I'm...trying..." Kid closed his eyes and let himself go to make it seem like he died. Death lowered his head down and clencthed his fist. He looked foward and saw Black Star, running away. He went after him and gave him a deadly reaper chop. "Ahhh! What the f* are you doing *%#!" snapped Black Star in a high-pitched girl voice, hopping around in pain. "Black Star? How could you?" asked Death in the most hurt voice. "Huh? What did I do?" asked Black Star, completly dumb-founded. Death didn't say anything else, he just violently cut him up with the scythe.

"Whoa, wait, I wanted him to get hurt but I didn't want him to get...hurt all like that." muttered Kid from the same spot he's been in since he faked his death. "He's not moving. Oh crap, he might be dead. Yeah, I think he's dead. Hm. Well, that's the end of Black Star." Kid shrugged. He put on a black robe and ran toward the party.

"Another one?" said Death, angry as hell. He started to attack Kid. He obviously dodged and perposly made him bloody up Stein. At the last minute, his sheid finally started to work right and he stopped his dad from ruining anything. Death was still furious though, so he kept swinging at him without even noticing that was Kid. He used the little shield to block the swings and suddenly took the scythe from him and from it being heavy, pointed it at him.

"Wow. I'm really good." Kid complemented himself. Death still didn't notice so he reaper chopped his head, knocking Kid straight down with his eyes wide open. "Oh...Kid, you're alive! How are ya?" asked Death, back to his normal self. "Braindead..." Kid responded, sounding like an old man. "This means I killed Black Star and Stein for nothing?" asked Death. "Well...you can kill Soul and Maka while you're at it." mumbled Kid, still sounding like an old man. "Why would you want me to do that? I thought they were your friends."

"Read the fic from the beggining and you'll get your answer."

"Or chapter 10." Maka added. "I don 't feel like reading so what's this about?" asked Death. "We wanted to throw you a party." said Blair. "But you killed Black Star..." said Soul. "And Stein! Who's gonna be my husband now?" cried Marie. "You and Stein got married?" asked Tsubaki. "No, but I was planning to..."

"And the decorations are on fire!" cheered Patty. Everyone looked around and noticed that they were now in a circle of fire instead of a party. "It's looks like big giraffe!" laughed Patty. Liz just looked at her with a sweatdrop coming down her head. "Well...it's the thought that counts, right, Dad?" asked Kid. "Nope, I'm headed back to the academy, where people don't fake their deaths."

Maka patted Kid's shoulder. "Think of the brightside, Kid. Black Star's dead." she said. "True, and the decorations are now dust. What about Stein?" asked Kid. Maka shrugged. "I'm kind of mad at you for that."

"I'm not!" cheered Soul, dancing with two chicken drumsticks. "So...now that you got your revenge, are we friends again?" asked Maka. "Not until this fic gets it's humor back..."

**Author's note: Sorry that the chapter was short, and that I rushed through it, and that it wasn't as funny as the others...if it was funny at all. I promise that the next chapter will have you laughing until your guts fall out! XD! Asura's Birthday! Kenzieee4's request!**


	12. Asura part 1

**Author's note**: **I'm coming back up! This chapter will contain a few scary scenes that will be cleared up with lol moments, an OC that isn't in any other story of mine. (He is completley awesome!), killing Black Star again (XD! It's so fun!), and the saying, "true true". NOTICE: Don't be afraid. You'll fall into Asura's madness if you do that. So feel free...to ****LAUGH****.**

Black Star was revived. The world was in deep depression because it was so. So...he and Kid went at it...again. They were just pushing each other back and fourth, arguing.

"Why don't you just die?" Kid asked angrily, pushing Black Star away.

"Because I'm a god! I don't die!" Black Star threw back, pushing Kid away.

"Oh yeah? Well so am I; a _real _god!" He pushed Black Star completely away.

"Well, if you're a god, then why can't you soul wave?" Black Star went to soul wave him. Kid dodged.

"If _you're _a god, why can't you do this?" Kid used that new power he had in the last chapter to attack him. Aparently, he didn't miss.

"Ugh...that's nothing..." Black Star stuggled to get back up. Kid attacked him again, bringing him to the ground. "Is that all you got?" asked Black Star, once again, trying to get up. Kid just brought him back down. He kept doing that to him each time he tried to get up until he didn't try anymore. "Some god you are...mortal." laughed Kid. By the way, they were at the academy. Soul, Maka and Tsubaki were watching this with Marie. "Kid, did you kill him?" asked Marie. Kid shrugged and walked away. Tsubaki ran to Black Star's help. She picked him up. He was smiling. "Is that all you got?" he mumbled. "Oh, Black Star..." Tsubaki whimpered, embarrased once again. "So, what do I do if he killed him?" asked Marie. Maka shrugged. Everyone went inside.

Liz and Patty were waiting for Kid inside the building. "Hi, Kid. Another win, I'm guessing?" asked Liz. Kid nodded. "I believe it's time we pick a mission."

Meanwhile, Tsubaki was repairing Black Star. "I almost had him, Tsubaki! I was right there!" snapped Black Star. "Black Star, it went the way it always goes. You two play around until he gets tired and finishes it off. You and Kid need to get along. There's going to be a day where you two will truly need each other." said Tsubaki. "That won't happen. I'm gonna kill Kid someday and surpass god, just like I did on my birthday, only he won't come back."

"You got to kill him because he let you. You'll never-"

"I will. Trust me." Tsubaki just sighed. There was no stopping the blue headed boy.

Meanwhile, Soul and Maka heard yelling outside the school. Them and Stein went out to see what it was.

"Liz, I didn't mean to! I was paranoid! There were kishin everywhere and you were out of weapon form! I'm sorry!" cried Kid, holding on to Liz while she was dragging him across the concrete, trying to get him off.

"You were looking at symmetry!" she threw back, trying harder to get him off. Kid held on tighter. "There was symmetry there, but I wasn't looking at it!"

"Says the OCD freak!"

"Liz, please! Don't leave me!" Liz came across the stairs and let him off there. She marched up the steps, leaving Kid, crying in the same position. "Liz, Patty, no!" he cried. "What's going on?" asked Maka. "Kid's going on. He almost killed me!" snapped Liz, pushing pass her. Her and Patty went to the Death Room and told Death what happened. Death didn't know what to do. The story seems quite petty, considering the fact it was an accident that Kid was about to blow her up with his new power. He didn't want his son to lose his weapon.

"I'm pretty sure he didn't mean it, Liz. There was kishin all over the place, and you were behind him." said Death, trying not to break loose and freak out. He was already uncontrollably sweating.

"We were trying to go into weapon form and he almost attacked me." Liz cleared.

"Kid wouldn't do it purposely, though."

"If he was looking at symmetry, he would...and he WAS!"

"Kid wouldn' t do that because he was looking at symmetry."

"Yes he would, he'd want to sit there and stare at it all day and do anything to look at it." Death was out of options. He had to beg now.

"Please, Liz! I'm begging you! Don't leave my son! What if he was trying to protect you? He loves you very much! He's obsessed with you two! He talks about you all the time! Just please don't leave him!" he cried, holding on to Liz's leg. "Oh my god, you're both just as whiney!" snapped Liz, now trying to kick Death off her leg. When she finally did, Spirit and Marie walked in on a crying Lord Death.

"Something wrong?" they asked at once. "Just leave me alone..." The two just stood there and looked at him with sweatdrops coming down their heads.

Kid was still on the steps, crying and Black Star came out to see what all the noise was. "What's wrong with Kid?" he asked. "He just lost Liz and Patty. Now he's having a break down." said Soul. "Ha ha ha! That's what you get, Kid!" he laughed. Kid heard this from the top of the stairs. He super jumped up them and punched Black Star in the face. At the moment, all you seen was gushing blood and that Black Star's face was truly sucked in.

Kid bashed him to the ground, breaking it to pieces. Black Star's legs stayed in the air for a while and then just randomly fell down. Kid turned around and cracked his knuckles while Soul and Maka went to see if Black Star was still alive.

"Whoa...he really did a job on your face." said Soul, cringing from the sight. Black Star's eyes were now very little with black circles completely around them, his face was covered with blood, his checks and lips were puffy and several of his teeth were gone.

"Shut up..." he muttered, not really able to talk. Soul and Maka picked him up and dragged him inside the academy. Kid followed. He went to the Death Room too.

"Don't you want to go too? Meisters can't go on missions by theirselves." said Death, now calm from crying. "I'm a reaper. I can do it. You're the one who said I don't even need weapons." said Kid. "True, true, but I don't want you to get hurt."

"Try me. Take me to the hardest mission you have. I'll nail it with flying colors."

"No, Kid. I'll take you to the easiest, but not the hardest. The hardest is a five-star meister mission. Someone reported several strong enemies containing extremely detructive powers including a bomb. All we knew about the name is that it started with an A. I'm not putting you in that situation. The last thing I need to hear is that you died on one of my missions."

"True, true. Afterall, I did pull that stunt on you last chapter already. Well, see ya later, Dad!" cheered Kid, suddenly in a better mood. "Alright, see you later!" Death cheered back, not noticing Kid's sudden mood swing.

Later on, Death went down to check the missions and seen that Mission Kishin A was taken. "Ooh! Someone finally decided to take Kishin A. I wonder who took it." he cheered. At that moment. He realized what he did in the Death Room and who took the mission. He started to sweat, standing in the same, happy position. "Lord Death, are you okay?" asked Sid, marking another mission.

He stayed silent. More sweat started to come down his head. "Sir?" Sid repeated. Nothing. Death just fell over. "Lord Death, are you alright? What the matter?" asked Sid. "My boy...he took the mission. He's going against Kishin A with no weapons..." he muttered. "Kid's going against Kishin A and not Liz and Patty. Death flung his hands in the air, slapping Sid in the face and got up screaming, "We have to stop him!"

Meanwhile, Kid was on his way to Kishin A. "This must be the location." Kid thought to himself, coming across a cave. He walked inside. For some odd reason, he felt his heart racing. Maybe he was more scared than he thought. He didn't have his weapons with him and he didn't know what he was up against. He almost started crying.

Suddenly, something behind him hopped up along with several black feathers. Kid turned around and prepared to fire his power, I'll just call it Death Bomb for now (Any ideas for a name, let me know!), but then he stopped. It was just a guy with dark blue hair, purple eyes, a black scarf, a dark blue shirt, black braclets and gray jeans. "Great, you're here!" he cheered. The boy was kind of young. He was about 3 years younger than Kid. His voice was surprizingly high. (He's kind of emo-looking so it's hard to believe that his voice was this high.)

"I'm Raven. Raven the Bird. Ha! Silly name, isn't it?" he yelled. "Uh...no. Heh, if you think that's weird, try Death the Kid." Kid responded.

"Is that your name?"

"Yeah. I would have my weapons here with me, but they quit on me."

"Sorry to hear that. Death the Kid isn't that bad. Don't get me wrong, 'kid' and 'death' doesn't mix, but it's not as bad as Raven the Bird."

"True, true. So, explain this kishin, if you're the witness of him."

"Well, I'm in search of my reaper. Every raven is supposed to have their own reaper to guard and I haven't found mine yet, but there _is_ a kishin down there."

"I know that. I need you to explain him and show me where he is so I can get rid of him."

"Need a weapon? Every raven is a weapon. If we get along, you can use me, but there_ is _a kishin down there."

"Raven, I understand that, but I need you to take me to him or her."

"Well the guy does have long hair, but I wouldn't call it a girl. There are a lot of guys with long hair, like you and me, but there_ is _a kishin down there."

"Raven! Work with me! I don't care if it's a girl or boy, I just need to know where it is!"

"There are a few people down there. Two hot women. Claim to be sisters. And a brother. Something with a G. As far as I know, it starts with a G. It could be spelled with a J, but there_ is _a kishin down there."

"Shut up and tell me where it is!"

"I told you. It's down there. Deeper in the cave."

"That's all you had to say."

"I did say that, but there_ is _a kishin down there. I'll take you there." Kid rolled his eyes. "Explain this kishin to me." he ordered. "Long, black and white hair, three red eyes and he has scarfs all over his neck. Lots of them. They have eyes too." Kid froze up. "What?" he whimpered, hoping it wasn't who he thought it was.

"Long, black and white hair...three red eyes...and scarfs." Raven repeated. Kid's eyes widened. "No! That's impossible!" he laughed off, startling Raven. "What? Are you calling me a lier?" he asked, offended.

"No, it's just...I have an idea of who you're talking about and I don't want to believe myself." Kid laughed, walking around in circles. "I guess that third eye is on his forehead."

"Yes." said Raven, while Kid continued to laugh and spin around.

"And and and, his hair is all black with white stripes coming down thick strands of it in front of his face!"

"Yes."

"And he uses those scarfs to attack people! Ha ha!"

"Yes!"

"And he shoots a spear out of his mouth! Ah ha ha ha ha ha!"

"YES!"

"Oh god!"

"Oh god!"

"AHHHHHH!"

"AHHHHHH!"

While the reaper and raven were busy screaming at each other in the face, Black Star was coming out of the academy with his "repaired" face. His eyes squinted extreamly from his puffy cheeks. He couldn't even close his mouth. He looked like a rockstar chipmunk.

"What's up with this?I can bearly talk with these cheeks of mine!" he snapped. "Black Star, don't worry about it. Stein told you not to talk or smile until your cheeks shrink. If you don't, the swelling will just continue." said Tsubaki. "I don't care what he says! If I have something to say, I'm gonna say it!" yelled Black Star. After he said that, his eyes started to water. "My cheeks!" he cried. "Stop talking!" yelled Tsubaki. Black Star plopped on his butt and held on to his cheeks, crying. "Black Star, if you touch them, it's gonna take longer to shrink!" Tsubaki warned.

Death was having a fit in the Death Room. He was worried about his son, but he didn't know who to send out there, considering the fact that he didn't even know who the kishin was. He was in there with Spirit, Marie and Sid. He hopped around all over the place, swinging his arms, causing them to slap and reaper chop all three of them.

"Lord Death, I'll go. I'm the strongest." said Sid. "What makes you the strongest?" asked Marie. "Yeah, I can take you on!" snapped Spirit. "No, you can kick the back of Justin Law's head." said Sid, punching Spirit's face in. "No fighting, guys." said Death. "I'll send Spirit and Stein. Go get Stein, Sid."

About 5 minutes later, Stein just ended up doing everyone elses face like Black Star's. All three of them had puffy faces now. "Let's go, Spirit. We have a reaper to save." said Stein. "Although, I would love to see what he can do against a kishin by himself."

Meanwhile, Kid and Raven raced through the halls after calming from screaming. "We have to stop whatever is being planned as fast as possible. I can't fight him alone so we'll just have to see what the real deal is first. I'll have to report this to the DWMA. I know they'll be upset." said Kid.

"So who is this guy?"

"Asura. That's his name. Not too long ago, he was spreading evil all around the world. It was horrible. The city fell apart, the academy fell apart, my dad fell apart, everything!" Kid explained, his eyes wide and his face showing how traumatized he was. "Are you alright?" asked Raven, noticing Kid's eyes rolling to his head. He snapped out of it and took a look at his new friend. He just nodded.

They stopped at a deeper cave. It shined purple. They saw Medusa, Aracnae (the two hot women), Giriko (the G man), and Asura standing around a purple pool. It was glowing. "This is my best posion yet. It revived you and Asura. Now we can cover the world with darkness for all eternity! All we have to do is get rid of the DWMA at the most unexpected time." Medusa laughed.

"Dammit. The same plan." whispered Kid, sliding across the rocky walls. "My birthday's coming up pretty soon, I don't have to do this on that day, do I? I'm tired." whined Asura. "Don't worry, sweetheart, you'll be alright." said Aracnae, hugging the kishin. Asura backed up and pointed in Kid and Raven's direction. "What's wrong?" asked Medusa. Asura was pointing at a bee.

"I'll get it for you." Aracnae crushed it with her hands. "See? All better." Kid rolled his eyes and kept moving. They moved behind a rock. "Hey, I think someone's here." said Giriko. "I wouldn't be surprized if it was that Justin Law guy."

Raven took out a notebook and started writing Justin Law on it. "What are you doing?" asked Kid. "Shut up!" Raven pulled Kid away from the rock and Justin Law appeared on the paper. "Gosh, I don't even know how I got here." said Justin, wearing a big smile on his face. Giriko broke the rock down. "It is him!" he snapped. "Giriko! It's good to see you again!" cheered Justin. "Damn you!" snapped Giriko, swinging his leg saw.

During all the comotion, Kid and Raven tried to make a run for it. It was too late. The reaper and raven were spotted.

Meanwhile, Black Star was outside the academy, waiting for Kid. His cheeks finally healed. "Where is that reaper? He needs to come out and show his face so I can pound it in!" he yelled. "Black Star, Kid's busy. I heard he went out to take on Kishin A." said Tsubaki. "Ha! Foolish reaper! He'll die!" laughed Black Star.

"Black Star, I wish you would quit saying things like that."

"Oh yeah, I forgot you liked him."

"You two should get along. I can only think of..." Tsubaki got up and walked away. Black Star shugged. Soul came out. "What's wrong with Tsubaki?" asked Soul. "Nothing. She's worried about Kid taking on Kishin A."

"Kid's taking on Kishin A? I thought Liz and Patty left him." Soul freaked. "They did."

"Don't you think we should do something about it? He could get hurt."

"He'll be fine. _I think the reaper will cry for mercy. I think that reaper will take one look and flee. If that reaper even makes an attempt, I bet he'll wet himself and screw up his rep._

_But will it matter at all? The moment he fails, the scent of his soul will fall. I can see it already, some weirdo putting him inside a box nice a steady."_

"Black Star, you're wrong for that." said Soul, grinning slightly.

"But you know it's true. Kid's gonna die. _By time school's over, he will live to his name. Where he goes next, he'll lie there in shame. People will greive, but I'll be okay. It's not my fault he went to Kishin A._

_Death will be dead. What a saying. Death will be dead. Death will be dead. Death for who, who gave their soul."_

"Shut up, Black Star. Tsubaki will kill you if you sing this." laughed Soul.

Raven showed Kid a good spot in the cave to hide from Medusa and Asura. While they were trying to get away, Kid mentioned that he was a reaper. "That's awesome! I found my reaper! Come on, Reaper!" cheered Raven, snatching up Kid and throwing him on his back. The excitment brought them to Medusa's attention. Raven broke out of the cave and Medusa followed. Asura slacked a bit. He didn't feel like doing anything.

Raven turned into a huge black bird with Kid on his back. "Alright, Raven, we have to dogde everything. We get hit, we die. Medusa has the vector arrow and Asura...too much." Kid explained, trying to get a hold of the bird.

_"Death of Death! I say, Death of Death! Death of Death! Death for who, who gave their soul!"_

Kid looked behind him over and over, trying to dodge the arrows. "Ray, do you have anything amo like?" he asked. "Yeah, but you better cover your nose. Pull my feathers." said Raven. Kid did so and Raven let out a loud, high-pitched scream, but that wasn't the only thing he let out. He layed two large eggs. They landed on Medusa. "Whoa. Raven. Damn!" whined Kid, covering his nose.

_"A reaper's soul, in the arms of Kishin A. Who knows what A stands for, but we'll sure find out today..."_

Kid and Raven lost the foe, but they didn't manage to lose Asura. He was still there. "I may not have as much power as I did before...but I have unfinished business...Lord Death's son." he whispered to himself.

_"Rest, soul. You have gone, so we're told. Just sleep, while the others grieve and weep..."_

The reaper turned around and noticed that Asura was near, ready to shoot his spear.

_"Death of Death..."_

Kid elbowed Raven down so he wouldn't get hurt the moment Asura fired.

_"Death..."_

Raven was confused and thought he did something wrong until that spear fired and hit Kid with a straight shot.

_"of..."_

The bird and reaper fell. All was lost.

_"Death..." _Black Star finished. "You're stupid, Black Star. That won't happen to Kid. I'm pretty sure Kishin A isn't even all that bad. Maybe the guy who reported it never seen a kishin before." said Soul.

"Yeah, but wouldn't it be funny if someone seen something beautiful and was scared of it because they never seen it before?"

"Ha ha! Yeah, that's actually what Kid would do. Like an A-symmetrical flower!"

"Or an A-symmetrical rainbow! One side is bigger than the other!"

"No, a car! A dent on one side and not on the other!"

"No, a dent a centimeter away from the middle!"

"No, an A-symmetrical dent in the middle!"

"You know, in the end, Kid isn't so bad of a guy."

"True, true."

"I should apoligize to him for earlier."

"Earlier in the fic? You pissed him off though the whole thing."

"True, true. I wonder who Kishin A is."

"Yeah. Maybe it's not a kishin at all. Heh, what if the witness just seen someone so ugly he thought it was a kishin?"

"Ha ha ha! It would be worse if it was a women."

"True, true!"

"What if Kishin A was Maka?"

"What if Kishin A was Tsubaki?"

"What if Kishin A was Stein?"

"What if Kishin A was Marie?"

"What if Kishin A was Crona?"

"What if Kishin A was Kid?"

"That would be so funny! Kid would be going after himself!"

"Wait, what if it was Liz and Patty?"

"They'd be the prankters of the century! I crown you the king of comedy!"

"You are the god of comedy!"

Meanwhile, Raven fought his dizziness and confusion to see what happened to Kid. "Oh god! My reaper! My reaper! This is terrible! My reaper! He got hit! My reaper! He's dying! My reaper! I have to do something! My reaper! Oh god! My reaper! Where the hell did he say he was from?" Raven freaked, running around in circles, crying. He quickly reached in Kid's pocket to see if he'd find something that would tell him where to go.

"Raven..." Kid muttered. "Yeah, Reaper? Are you okay?" asked Raven. "I got Asura speared, do I look like I'm ok-kay-ay?" Kid was interupted by his heavy coughing. "Don't worry, just tell me where you live, or where I can find a hospital. I can help you!"

"I-I'm done fo-for. When my dad got hit, he had help right next to him. Me, I-I'm a mile away, by time we get there..." Kid was now coughing up blood. "Reaper!"

"Raven..." His words were now a soft whisper. "Incase you want to try anyway...go...to...the DWMA..."

Kid passed out, blood running down his mouth. "Don't worry, Reaper, I will save you. I've waited too long to let you die off like this." Raven went into his bird form and plopped Kid on his back.

**Author's note: To be continued...  
>So tell me what you think, and let me know your opinion of Raven! Sorry about Kid...again. (He'll be fine.)<strong>


	13. Asura part 2

**Author's note: I'm back with Asura's Birthday Part 2! Yay!  
>Asura's revived! Oh my gosh! What will happen next?<br>Will Raven save Kid's life or will the reaper die?  
>Will the academy ever know of Asura's revival?<br>Will Black*Star and Soul ever quit laughing?  
>Will I tell you that this is more on the serious side even though in the end it's still funny as hell?<br>Find out!**

Black*Star and Soul were chilling in the front of the academy, trying to calm down from laughing. "No seriously, all jokes aside, do you really think Kid will be alright out there? Against Kishin A," asked Soul. "I'm sure he'll be fine," said Black*Star. "I really wouldn't care if something happened to him."

"Yeah, right. You'd be the first one to ask if he was going to live.  
>(Mimicing Black*Star) Will he alright? Will he live for at least one more day?<br>(Mimicing Stein) You know it's just a flesh wound, right?  
>(Mimicing Black*Star) I know! He'll die!<br>(Mimicing Stein) Black*Star, he'll be fine.  
>(Mimicing Black*Star) NO!<br>(Minicing Kid) I'm alright you fool!"

"No way! I wouldn't do that." (Remember he said that...)

Meanwhile, Stein and Spirit were rushing in the woods of nowhere to find Kid. "I would still like to see the battle between Kid and Kishin A. Kid's a strong person. He might be able to pull it off without Liz and Patty," said Stein. "But he's been using them for so long. Are you sure about that? Plus you don't even know who Kishin A is," Spirit pointed out in weapon form. "True, true, but it would still be interesting."

Raven was getting tired of flying Kid in the air. The reaper was right: the DWMA was very far away. He just might be dead before he's even half way there. "I will save you, Reaper," Raven vowed, pushing harder. "Look, Stein, that bird's carrying Kid. I can see him," said Spirit. Stein looked up and saw the reaper on the raven's back. "You're right. I guess the battle between him and Kishin A didn't go so well afterall," Stein resonded, running up a tree to soul wave the bird.

"Soul wave!" Stein soul waved Raven, causing him to hit the ground. Kid as well. He was coughing up blood and gasping for air. Stein and Spirit were worried for Kid's life. From what they could see, they didn't have much time to save him. Raven was still determined to get Kid help. He ignored the pain from the soul wave and pushed himself up. He picked Kid up. "I will save you, Reaper," he repeated. "Who are you," asked Stein, sensing Raven's soul and understanding his wave lenth. "It's my reaper. He's dying! I'm trying to get him to his school but things keep trying to slow me down. I'm not going to give up! He's not going to die on me! I have to get him to a doctor and quick," Raven explained.

"Well, the academy's pretty far away," Stein pointed out. "Oh, it's no use! He's dying! It's no use! There's no doctor near by! It's no use! It's no use! It's no use," cried Raven. He hugged Kid and sobbed wildly. Stein gently placed his hand on Raven's shoulder and replied, "I'm a doctor." Raven smiled. Stein smiled back. "I'll make sure he doesn't die. You can kill me if he doesn't survive because I'm pretty sure I'll have a whole mob on me if he doesn't." Raven fainted. Stein opened his jacket and took out a lot of surgical equipment. "Stein!" snapped Spirit, now in human form. "We don't have time to take him to the academy. From what I can see he's too critical to wait." Stein responded. Spirit didn't say anything. He just let Stein do Stein.

Back at the academy, Tsubaki and Maka were bopping Black*Star and Soul's head's together, literally. "Damn you, Black*Star! We heard everything you said! How dare you?" cursed Tsubaki. "We heard the song too! We should kick your asses!" Maka added. "Isn't what you're doing right now enough?" asked Soul, grunting from the constant head butting. "NO!" Black*Star snatched away. "If you care about Kid so much, why don't we just go to Kishin A ourselves and help him out?" he asked. "Good! We should!" snapped Tsubaki. "Yeah, let's go!" Maka agreed. The four did so. Afterward, Sid came out and heard the plan. He ran to Lord Death about it. He didn't think it was a good idea for them to go out there.

Soul and Maka were on the same motorcycle Kid gave him. Black*Star and Tsubaki was riding the old motorcycle he had. "Do we know where were going?" asked Soul. Everyone shrugged. "Isn't it like, a mile away?" asked Tsubaki. "Hey, you're the one who wanted to save Kid. I bet you he's on his way back right now!" snapped Black*Star. "You're the one who made the suggestion!" snapped Maka. "I think Kid will be fine." said Soul. "It would still be nice to be there, right?" said Tsubaki. "You're just worried because you like his ass." Soul pointed out. "Hey, Soul, wanna race?" asked Black*Star. "You're on!" cheered Soul, getting a head start. "No you don't!" laughed Black*Star, rushing to get ahead. "Soul!" cried Maka, holding on tight to her weapon. "Black*Star!" cried Tsubaki, holding on tight to her meister.

The weapon and meister were going so fast, they were already half way there. Black*Star was ahead. He was using speed star anyway. Tsubaki and Maka were starting to enjoy the ride. Even if Kid _did_ come out to be okay, it would've been worth the trip. Black*Star turned around and saw that Soul was far behind. The scythe was getting frusterated. Black*Star saw his frustration and cracked up laughing. Not paying attention, he ran into a tree. Soul came to a stop.

"Dammit, Black*Star! You ruined my bike, and your head for that matter!" snapped Soul. Tsubaki got off the bike and noticed that her meister's cheeks swelled up again. "My cheeks!" cried Black*Star. Incase you forgot what he looks like with those puffy cheeks, I said he looks like a rockstar chimpmuck. "My cheeks hurt so bad! The heavy wind is making it worse!" Black*Star whined. Tsubaki also noticed the wind. "It's getting late." She claimed. "That's all. School will be over soon. Maybe Kid really is in trouble."

As we know by now, he was. Spirit was watching Stein operate. He was cringing magerly. The now awake Raven knew better than to look, even though he didn't look because he figured he'd faint again. "Oh god! How do you do this everyday? How could you do this to me all the time?" he snapped, now throwing up. "Shut up!" snapped Stein. He was under a lot of presure. He could only imagine the things that would happen to him if Kid died. He felt the wind blow through his hair from the right. He turned to that direction. He was able to see things flying through the air.

"I can't go any further. This could cause an infection." he muttered to himself. He closed Kid up and covered his full body with his jacket. "Stein, what are you doing?" asked Spirit. "This wind could effect Kid's insides. I have to get him to a building now and quick. If we don't get there in time, there's no doubt he'll die." Raven formed into a bird. "I can get you there. Just lead the way." said Raven. Stein nodded and threw Kid on Raven's back.

Black*Star and Soul had to walk, now that the bike was broken. "It's getting dark. Kid's dead." said Black*Star. Tsubaki sighed sadly. "Why are we still going?" she asked. "To see Kid's dead body" Black*Star responded. "Black*Star, cut it out." said Soul, still mad at him for ruining his bike. Dead. Tsubaki's ears rung when she heard the word. "Something's telling me we need to go faster..." she whimpered, starting to run. Soul, Maka and Black*Star followed her. They noticed that Raven was in the sky. They didn't see Kid and Stein, but they saw Spirit hanging from the feet and that a raven passing by wasn't a good sign.

"Speed Star!" yelled Black*Star. Tsubaki went into weapon form to catch up with Black*Star. Soul and Maka followed. "Follow the raven!" Tsubaki ordered. Meanwhile, Lord Death was banging his head on a wall. "Calm down, Lord Death, I'm sure your son's fine." said Marie for the 88th time. "I CAN'T! My son's down there...ALONE...LOST...COLD...HUNGRY...DEAD DEAD DEAD!" cried Death, falling to the floor. "Why was I so careless?"

"It wasn't your fault. He was the one who decided to take on Kishin A. Maybe he'll make it. Kid's a very strong boy. I seen many things from him."

"True, true, but I'm still worried."

"I understand, but you have to calm down. If you don't things will never be solve."

"I guess your right. I should stop worring...MY SON!" Lord Death broke down on the floor. Marie had to think for a minute. This guy was really getting annoying. Marie picked him up off the floor and slapped him in the face.

(You can offically call this a musical. I'm a music person. ^^)

_"Who are you to deny the abilities of your son?" _she sang. Lord Death just looked at her and shrugged.

_"Out of all the students with the skill, if you leave it up me to pick one...  
>It'd be Kid.<br>Death the Kid."_

Soul and Maka raced through the path to the acdemy. Black*Star was getting whoozy. "Are you all right, Black*Star?" asked Soul. "Yeah..." Black*Star, falling back and running into Soul's wheels. "Dude!" snapped Soul, uncontrollably running into a tree. "Damn you, Black*Star!" Black*Star's cheeks swelled up again, only this time, they exploded and blood gushed all over the place. "Yuck!" groaned Maka, cringing hard.

_"It's no trouble for him  
>He'll break anything down limb from limb.<br>Take it from me.  
>I've seen many things.<br>If I name someone extrodunary,  
>It'd be Kid.<br>Death the Kid."_

Soul had to pull Black*Star from his wheel. "Thanks to you, I have two bikes to fix, and this is my best one." Soul complained. "Soul, aren't you worried about Kid and Black*Star?" asked Maka. "I'm more worried about Kid and that raven. Do you think he's alright?" asked Soul. Tsubaki and Maka shrugged.

_"And you should know.  
>He's your son. Your son.<br>You've seen about every move.  
>So I suggest, you chill.<em>

_He's taken on many guys,  
>You must realize<br>He's got this!_

_DWMA  
>The acdemy<br>has got some strong kids,  
>Kid is one of them!" <em>Marie hopped and danced around to cheer Death up. He started dancing with her.

Soul had to ride the bike anyway, although there was blood all over the wheels. "We're almost at the acdemy!" cheered Tsubaki. Soul stopped the bike and the others followed him up the steps. They were just in time. The raven landed and it was bigger than they thought.

_"And you should know.  
>He's your son. Your son.<br>You've seen about every move.  
>So I suggest, you chill.<em>

_He's taken on many guys,  
>You must realize<br>He's got this!_

_DWMA  
>The acdemy<br>has got some strong kids,  
>Kid is one of them!" <em>Her and Death danced through the halls. Other students started to dance and sing with them.

_"And you should know.  
>He's your son. Your son.<br>You've seen about every move.  
>So I suggest, you chill.<em>

_He's taken on many guys,  
>You must realize<br>He's got this!_

_DWMA  
>The acdemy<br>has got some strong kids,  
>Kid is one of them!<br>Kid is one of them!  
>Kid is one of them!<br>Kid is one of them!" _The song ended. Everyone threw their hands in the air happily. (They don't even know...)

Soul, Maka and the others noticed that Kid was on the raven. Tsubaki fell out. Stein looked behind them and noticed the students. He didn't pay them any mind. Kid was more important. Raven went back to his normal form and helped Stein take Kid inside.

While everyone was still smiling with their hands in the air, Stein pushed through them, bringing Kid to Lord Death's attention. He fell out as well. Marie had to stay with him and fan him. Spirit had to help put Kid on a strecher. Afterwards, he went to go help Marie do something with Death. Meanwhile, Medusa was out with Aracnae and Giriko. They were looking for Asura. Asura was wondering around in the city. "I don't want to do this with the whole DWMA thing. I'm not in the mood to deal with all the drama." he thought.

(This is not Asura singing)

_"She doesn't understand.  
>I cant' make it.<br>This is my second chance.  
>I don't want to take it...<br>for granted._

_Just might see the world in a whole other way now.  
>The drama from the first time,<br>I just don't know how._

_It's gone all pointless and, it's no longer even worth it.  
>All the evil we tried to spread<br>I think I've had enough, and this time I'm certain._

(Asura thinking in rhythm)

Maybe I can get in good with Lord Death.

A penguin flying is the best chance I'll get.

He might forgive me, but I'm not the one.

He'll say, 'you crossed the line when you tried to kill my son.'

Then he'll slap me, and throw me down the stairs,

Set me on fire, starting with my hair.

I can only imagine the things he'll do to me.

I screwed up as far as I can see.

_Just might see the world in a whole other way now.  
>The drama from the first time,<br>I just don't know how._

_It's gone all pointless and, it's no longer even worth it.  
>All the evil we tried to spread<br>I think I've had enough, and this time I'm certain._

Maybe I can try to marry Aracnae.

Then again I took her soul and ran away.

I'm surprized she didn't kill me at first sight.

Man, my hands are tied and damn, are they tied tight.

_Just might see the world in a whole other way now.  
>The drama from the first time,<br>I just don't know how._

_It's gone all pointless and, it's no longer even worth it.  
>All the evil we tried to spread<br>I think I've had enough, and this time I'm certain._

Maybe I'll start a begining of my own.

But I'm so damn scared, I'll probably turn into stone.

No.

Medusa will do that for me.

Readers and Reviews, we too have heard the story.

I'd say this bitch is worse.

Just thinking about her puts me into a cringing curse.

Maybe I just can't do anything with myself.

My first two lives really screwed up my health.

_Just might see the world in a whole other way now.  
>The drama from the first time,<br>I just don't know how._

_It's gone all pointless and, it's no longer even worth it.  
>All the evil we tried to spread<br>I think I've had enough, and this time I'm certain._

_Just might see the world in a whole other way now.  
>The drama from the first time,<br>I just don't know how._

_It's gone all pointless and, it's no longer even worth it.  
>All the evil we tried to spread<br>I think I've had enough, and this time I'm certain."_

Lord Death came to and he went to go check on his son. Stein was finished with his work by then. "How is he?" he asked Stein. "He's stable, I can say that." Stein answered. "I suggest staying out of there though. He looks horrible, it'll break your heart."

"I'm afraid my heart's already broken. I still can't believe this happened to him."

"It's not your fault. You didn't even know who Kishin A was."

"I didn't want him to go out there."

"Well, it was his decision."

"So, will he be okay?"

"I'm not sure. His chest was torn open. I didn't know what happened to him, so I just cleared that up."

"Torn...open?" Stein nodded. "I don't know how it happened. I do have a witness here. Some raven guy who knows everything that happened. I'm about to go ask him right now." Stein did just that walked over to Raven. "Hey." he called. Raven looked up. He was sitting on the floor in the hall. "Yes?" he whimpered. It was late and the raven was very tired. "My name is Dr. Stein. I need to ask you some questions for Kid's sake. Okay?" Raven nodded. "What happened to Kid?"

"I don't know." Stein's eyes widened. "What do you mean you don't know?"

"When Reaper was attacked, I didn't see anything."

"How the hell didn't you see anything?"

"He elbowed me in the head and then there was a huge blast. Next thing I know, he dying in my arms."

"Do you know the kishin's name?"

"Not really. I can never remeber it. Aaaa. Aaaa. Aaaa."

"Aaaa what?"

"Aaaa! Aaaa! Aaaa!"

"Think!"

"I can't remeber!" Raven broke down crying and Stein just patted his back. "There goes Kid...me too."

"What do you mean 'you?'"

"Let's just say, I messed up with something like this before. I should've died then."

"How excactly did you mess up?"

"It doesn't matter. What matters is Kid. I really need to know what happened to him."

"Well...is he conscious?"

"I don't know. Why?"

"He can tell you. He knew his name pretty well. I remember how scared he looked when he found out."

"Kid? Scared? What?" Raven nodded. "Terrified. I seen the fear in his eyes. Strong fear."

"That's not like him. Let's go see if he's alright."

**Author's note: Ha! I am leaving you again! And to do something different...I'M NOT COMING BACK...until two chapters later!**

**Review This Chapter**

**Just kidding! I'm not going to do that to you! But, I just might leave you hanging again. (A heads up I forgot to put in the begging.)**

Stein and Raven walked inside Kid's room. He seemed like he was still unconsious. "REAPER!" screamed Raven, flying around all over the place, getting black feathers in Stein's face. "Shut up!" yelled Stein, pulling Raven down by his wings. "Hey! No...touching...THE WINGS!" snapped Raven. "Okay, whatever, just shup up so that Kid can rest!"

"It's a bit late for that..." whimpered a tired voice. It was Kid. "You sure know how to be...disruptive."

"Reaper, you're okay!" cheered Raven. "No I'm not." Raven choked up. Stein just walked up to Kid. "I need to ask you some questions." said Stein. "Okay." Kid's voice was getting lower. "Who was Kishin A and what happened to you? What made you so scared?"

"Kishin A was..." Kid didn't get a chance to answer the question. He fell back asleep. "Isn't that wonderful?" Stein complained sarcastically. "He'll wake back up, I'm sure." said Raven. Lord Death walked in. "You were right, Stein, he does look horrible. This...saddens me." he whimpered. "I told you not to come in here." whined Stein. "I couldn't help it. I was worried."

"And seeing him like this is going to make you feel better?"

"NO! Not at all!"

"Ugh!" Stein started to bang his head against a wall. "Fine! I guess we'll just sit here and wait for Kid to wake up! I can't save him if I don't know what happened to him!" Death sat down next to Stein and sighed. Raven sat with them. "So who are you?" he asked, breaking the silence. "I'm Death, his father." Raven's eyes widened. He fell on his knees. "What an honor it is to be in your presence! I, Raven the Bird is at your son's service!" Lord Death just stared at him with a sweatdrop coming down his head. He didn't know how to react to that. "Um...thanks?" he whimpered. "He...thanked me!" Raven fainted. Stein and Death looked at each other and shrugged. "Well, I guess they're both out now." said Stein. "That they are. That they are."

"Hey, I heard Kid was scared of Kishin A." From underneath the mask, Death shot a look at him. Stein shot a look at Death. There was silence. Breaking the silence, Death busted out laughing hysterically. His laugh was deep and evil. "Kid? Scared? Ha! Hahahahaha! Muwahahaha!"

"For the love of God, please stop laughing!" cried Stein. "Muwa ha! Why?"

"Your laugh is...scaring me." Death started laughing harder. Stein held on to his ears and started screaming. The noise woke Raven up. "Wow, Reaper sure is a heavy sleeper." he pointed out. Both Stein and Death calmed down. "Hey, your right." Death agreed, going back to his normal self. "Did you find out who Kishin A is yet?" asked Raven. "Asura..." Kid mumbled in his sleep, turning over. Stein and Death looked at each other with sweatdrops down their heads. "He didn't say that, right?" Death nervously giggled. "No! Not at all!" Stein cheered, starting to play Patty Cake with him.

"_Patty Cake, Patty Cake  
>Baker's man<br>Bake me a cake  
>as fast as you can!" <em>They sung. "Wait! What letter are we going to use at the end?" asked Death. "D for Death and Dr. Stein." Stein suggested. "I want to play!" called Raven. "But your name doesn't start with D." Death pointed out. "There's a D in Bird." Raven threw back. "Yes! It's perfect then!" cheered Stein.

"_Patty Cake, Pattey Cake  
>Baker's man<br>Bake me a cake  
>as fast as you can!<br>Roll it and pat it  
>And mark it with a D!" <em>

Kid woke up and caught the reaper, doctor and raven happily playing this game. They stopped with sweatdrops coming down their heads. "Hi there, Kiddo!" Lord Death played off. "I'm dead, aren't I?" asked Kid. "How are you feeling?" Death asked, trying to get the thought out Kid's head. "Fine, I guess. My chest still hurts and seeing you of all people play Patty Cake did not do me any good."

"I'm sorry. It's just that we were trying to get something out of our minds."

"Listen, Kishin A has to be stopped before he gets any stronger. I'm not going to say his name too loud because I don't want to freak out the entire academy." Kid pulled his dad close to him. Stein and Raven closed in as well. "Kishin A is Asura." Kid whispered.

"WHAT?" snapped the three. "Well, no need to ask you what else happened. I already know." said Stein. "How close were you?" asked Death, now a worried reck again. "Close enough." Kid responded. "Oh, you poor thing..." Death sobbed. "Since when do you cry anyway?" asked Kid. Death was silent. "Although you knew who the kishin was, I still don't understand why you were afraid." Stein pointed out. "Well, I might have fallen into his madness...BUT ONLY FOR A SECOND...I think." Kid shot a look at them. He didn't forget about the Patty Cake game. The sweatdrops returned. "So what should we do? You sounded like you had a plan." asked Death, blowing it off again.

"I think we should only send a portion of the academy out to take out Asura while he's still weak. That way, we have a problem solved without even having to tell the whole school." Kid explain. "My...you're gonna be a heck of a reaper someday, Kid. Alright! Let's go with the boy's plan! Get me Soul, Maka, Black Star and Tsubaki...and, let Raven, here sub for Kid." Death ordered. Raven hopped in the air and cheered happily. "I won't fail you two!" he vowed, rushing out the door.

"Hey, you might want to get some out for Medusa too. She's the one who revived him. She's planning to attack the academy." Kid added. "Good thinking, son! I'll send Justin out."

"You can't. Raven summoned him there for a distraction. I don't know what happened to him."

"..."

"Sorry."

"Oh well, whatever! I'll take of it."


	14. Asura part 3

**Author's note: It's another chapter on the same birthday! OMG! Coming to the big conclusion! I promise, it will end here. (The subject of Asura's birthday that is. Not the whole story.) I'm sorry it's taking several chapters too. Season 4 scared the hell out of me and I had to use that fear and have a funny twist to it. It's working so far as I can see. Yay! Listening to Strength while typing isn't making this any better...**

"Asura, I don't know what's wrong with you, but we have to destroy the acdemy right now!" snapped Medusa after finally finding the kishin. "It's my birthday, you know." Asura whimpered. "Well, Happy Birthday, get your ass moving!" Asura sadly got us and walked away. "Maybe you shouldn't be so hard on him." Aracnae suggested. "No!" snapped Medusa. "Let's head to the academy."

Soul, Maka and the others were on their way to Asura. They were right on time. "What? How did they know?" asked Medusa. "I thought you killed Kid and whoever that other guy was." Asura shrugged. "Go kill them now! We'll take care of the academy." Medusa ordered. Asura did as he was told.

"There he is!" Raven pointed out. Maka looked up. Fury grew in her. "How...?" she whispered to herself. "Think we can take him on another time?" asked Black Star. "Not really." said Soul. "Come on, guys, don't lose hope. It hasn't even started yet." said Maka. "Yeah, I never even met this guy before, and I'm game! Let's go!" Raven cheered. "I wish there were more people like that." sighed Tsubaki. "How's Kid, by the way?" asked Black Star. "He's fine. He's a fast healer." Raven answered. "Just like Kid..." Soul sighed happily.

Asura landed on the ground. "Look, I just want to apoligize for before. I was planning to change my ways, but I'm being held against my will right now, so I have to hurt you. I see that Kid isn't here, so could you tell him I'm sorry. I truly regret what I did to him. He'll probably be scarred for life now." he whimpered.

The students shot looks at him. This was coming from Asura. Very strange. "Uh..." Maka started, who was really about to cuss him out. Asura busted out crying. "I don't know what to do with myself! Ever since I revived, I just didn't know what I wanted to do with my third life! I don't deserve one! I just want to kill myself!" he snapped. The five just stood there with sweatdrops down their heads.

"Asura...?" whimpered Maka. Asura fell to the ground. "Just kill me! I don't want to live any more!" he whined. "Don't fall for it. He's probably trying to trick us." said Black Star. "Yeah, if he really meant well, he wouldn't try to hurt Kid!" Tsubaki added. "I told you I was being held against my will!" Asura pointed out.

"Well, I still want to kick his ass." said Maka. "Well, we can't jump to conclusions. Remember Crona?" Soul pointed out.

"I never got to try." Raven whined. "Trust us, you don't want to." said Maka. "No! I'll try anything! No matter how hard!" Maka and Black Star looked at each other and shrugged. "Let's give him a try." they suggested.

Meanwhile, Kid was feeling lonely and left out in his new room. He felt better, he wanted to help beat Asura. He heard a knock at the door. "Who is it?" he asked. Liz and Patty walked in the door. "Liz? Patty?" whimpered Kid, looking up anxiously. "Girls!" he cheered. "What brings you back?"

"Well, we heard that Asura came back and we knew you'd want to help kick his ass so we came to get you. We didn't know you were injured though. Sorry for leaving you, Kid. This probably never would've happened if-" Liz stared. "It's alright, Liz. If you didn't leave, I never would've found out about Asura." Kid interupted. "Eh, we couldn't live without you anyway." Liz played off cheerfully. "Really?" asked Kid, realived. "Of course! Who got us off the streets and into the classy academy?" Liz answered.

"It's great to see you again. Come on, let's kick some Asura ass."

"Bee..." Asura repeated, constanly pointing out its every move. Maka and the others pointed with him. They used the bee as an excuse to why they weren't kicking Asura's ass right now. They really felt bad for him.

"It's a big bee, too." said Black Star. "That it is." said Soul. "Why is it flying in the same direction?" asked Maka. "Maybe it's like Kid; it likes circles." said Tsubaki. "Symmetrical ones." Soul added. "Reaper likes symmetry? Tell me more!" cheered Raven. "That's pretty much all you need to know." said Soul. "No it's not! I want to know all about my reaper!"

Pink gun shots flew to Asura rapidly. The five looked up and seen Kid in the sky on his skateboard, shooting at Asura. "Reaper! He's alive!" cheered Raven, crying with joy. "Kid's alive and well!" Tsubaki cheered as well. "Eh..." sighed Black Star, acting like he wasn't as worried.

"Oh no. If you guys won't kill me, Kid will. He's like father, hateful and unforgiving." said Asura. Black Star ran to Kid, crying. He squeezed him. "Oh, Kid, I thought I lost you!" he cried. Kid shot a look at him and pushed him back. Black Star stopped crying and took a look around. Everybody, even Asura was shooting looks at him.

Kid shrugged and started to shoot Asura again. "Reaper, said Asura wants to come clean." Raven reported. "Ha! Yeah right!" Kid laughed, continuing to shoot. "He's serious." said Maka. "I'm not buying it." said Kid. "I don't care. I'm loving the pain." mumbled Asura.

Medusa, Aracnae, Giriko, Free and Justin were at the academy. "You really shouldn't hold me hostage." said Justin. "Shut up, Law!" snapped Giriko. "We're blow this place down!" laughed Medusa. "I've got it covered." said Free. "Giriko and Free look alike." giggled Aracnae. "How?" asked Medusa, observing them. "I don't know...they just do." Medusa looked at Giriko and then Free and then Giriko and then Free. "I see the resemblance." said Justin out of the blue. "I don't see it!" whined Medusa.

Eurka and Mizune was sent to the students that were sent to kill Asura. (By the way, they were at that spot where there's a brige and water. There were a lot of scenes there in the series. I don't really know what it was called or how to explain it better. Eh.)

Since Kid was the one attacking Asura, she threw a tadpole at him. "Reaper, look out!" warned Raven. Before Kid could move, he noticed that Asura was taking the blow. Kid's eyes widened. His friends weren't bull shitting him. The last thing he saw was Asura falling into the water, still looking at Kid. Stunned, he dropped his guns. "He...saved me." he whimpered.

Soul and Maka went to attack Eurka. Raven walked to Kid and patted his shoulder to comfort him. Kid jumped in the water. "What the hell are y0u doing, you idiot?" snapped Black Star. "I trust Reaper. He knows what he's doing, I'm sure." said Raven with a straight, confident face.

Black Star just looked down at the water patiently. "I get to kill you if he dies, right?" asked Black Star. Raven shot a look at him. "Welcome to Death City." said Tsubaki. Kid flew out of the water with Asura in his hands. He summoned his board and shot it to the sky, knocking down Eurka to a pile of her own bombs. He landed back on the ground with Asura still in his hands.

"Thanks for the help, Kid." said Maka, coming back down from the sky. "You saved me?" asked Asura, gasping for breath. "If you can't get in good with my father, you'll get in good with us." Kid responded with a smile. Asura looked around and noticed that the others were smiling too.

"Aw...thanks, you guys! You still have to stop Medusa, though. She definatly didn't change any." said Asura. "True, true." said Maka. "Well, you and Soul can go get her because Medusa was never my problem anyway." said Kid.

"Yes she was! She was the one who almost made you distrust your dad when you didn't even know the full situation in the first place, and I really think you're a nosy bastard for that so shut up and come with me!" snapped Maka, causing many sweatdrops to come to Kid's head. The "nosy bastard" part hit him the most.

"Okay, let's just go then!" he laughed off, nervously.

"Aracnae, dammit! I don't see the resemblace!" snapped Medusa. "Just look closely." said Aracnae. "I see it too. Sure, Free's darker but-" Justin started. "I don't see it!" Medusa whined angriliy. Free and Giriko looked up. "Medusa, we're under attack!" they warned at the same time. "Now I see the resemblace!" cheered Medusa. Free and Giriko were in the same position with the same face exprestion.

At that moment, Raven threw a silver bomb with wings at them. Justin shrugged and gracefully walked in the academy. "See you later, Giriko." he cheered. "Damn you!" they called out at the same time. "Predicted again!" laughed Justin.

"Great job, Raven!" said Kid, slapping him on the back. "At your service, Reaper!" yelled Raven. Kid smiled at him and Raven smiled back. "Okay, I never met this guy. Who is he?" asked Asura. "I'm Raven the Bird! Nice to meet you, Asura!" Raven cheered. "What excactly are you?"

"Raven hybrid, I guess." (Answering Crona's True Sorrow's question. I belive it was CTS, anyway.)

The next day, Maka, Kid and the others reported that Asura was "dead."

"Very good work, you all! I promise I will reward you well for taking on Asura sucessfully two times in a row!" cheered Lord Death. "So what do we do with Raven?" asked Maka. "He can join the academy, if he so choose."

"Of course!" cheered Raven. He summoned an egg in his hand and broke it. A long, round hammer with wings came out of it. "This is what I was talking about, Reaper. I can summon any weapon you want incase one of the girls go away." said Raven. Kid's eyes widened. "I fell in love" he sighed, hugging Raven. "Hey, hey, hey!" snapped Liz. "We're your weapons too!"

"Oh man, I don't know what to do!" whined Kid. "Well, you'll have plenty of weapons once you get older so just take all three of them. I don't care." said Death. "Really? Yay! I got three of them! Three of them!" cheered Kid, hopping around in joy.

"That sucks. Why can't I have three weapons?" asked Black Star. "With me, you have about four weapons in one." Tsubaki pointed out. "Yeah, but not individually."

"We'll be belonging to Kid anyway."

"What?" asked Soul. "We'll be belonging to Kid in the future. We'll be luck if we're Lord Death's weapon for at least a year." Tsubaki repeated. "NO! That's not fair! I don't want to be Kid's weapon!" cried Soul.

"Ahhh!" Kid screamed in pain. "You shoud've known better than to hop around like that." said Liz, simply shaking her head. "What happened?" asked Raven. "I split my stiches! Now they're not symmetrical, although I never believed they were symmetrical in the first place!" cried Kid. "You guys were right, he sure likes symmetry." laughed Raven. "Welcome the Death Weapon Meister Academy." said Soul.

**Author's note: We're finished! Horray! Listening to Strengh while doing this did not make it any better, but I am now taking any more requests you might want. Sorry, I forgot to kill Black Star. Oh look, he's dead! Yay! Up coming birthdays:  
>Mifune<br>Twilight  
>Medusa<br>Maka  
>Free.<br>Review me!**


	15. Mifune

**Author's note: Breathe, dear readers. We've come a long way. Now, let's start with a normal day in Death City, where a worried Soul and Black Star check on Kid at the academy. By the way, Raven's still here.**

"Hey Kid." said Soul. Kid was sick. He was still affected by the happingings of the last three chapters.

"Hi..." he muttered. "How you feeling?" asked Black Star. "So so. I'm not dying. I'm just...sick." Kid answered. "I heard it was Mifune's birthday today. Planning anything, Black Star?" he asked. "No. I didn't even know it was his birthday." Black Star responded. "You should do something for him. You know him better than I do and I'm sick anyway. It's up to you to take the dangerous responsiblity of celibrating a birthday."

"Why are you taking this so seriously?" asked Black Star. "It's actually a very dangerous mission." said Kid. "No it's not." said Black Star. "Trust me, Black Star, I've been doing this for 14 chapters. Don't start with me." Black Star just shrugged. "Well, we hope you feel better." said Soul as he and Black Star walked out the room. "He'll find out..."

Soul and Black Star went to the store to see if they could get Mifune a gift for his birthday.

"Should we get him food?" asked Black Star. "Does Kid hate symmetry?" Soul responded. Black Star understood his sarcasim and he went on.

"Should we get him new swords?" he asked. "Does Stein need more surgical equipment?"

"Should we get him clothes?"  
>"Is Tsubaki rude?"<br>"Quit answering me that way!" Black Star marched out the store. "We'll make him something." Black Star confirmed.

Meanwhile, Angela, the little witch, was baking a cake for Mifune. She had him wearing a party hat, which looked very weird on him because he still had that saltly look on his face and that piece on wheat in his mouth. "Happy birthday, Mifune!" she cheered, putting the pink cake in front of him. He glared at it. "Thanks." he muttered.

Black Star managed to make a gift basket for him. It contained cologne, lotion, sword polish, blade sharpener, a razor and shaving cream. (Although he has nothing to shave.) The two walked to his place, where Mifune was happily eating cake. (Extreamly strange thought.) Black Star knocked on the door. With constantly shook nerves, Mifune whiped his mouth and took out his swords, forgeting to take off the party hat.

He slowly opened the door. "Happy...!" Soul and Black Star started. Mifune quickly stabbed them both, without even noticing who it was and shut the door. "What the hell...?" muttered Soul. "I forgot, he's a guardian, he has...constantly shooken nerves." Black Star muttered back. The blue haired boy and the white haired boy left the gift basket at the front of the door and limped away. Mifune slowly went outside to check out if anyone was there. He saw the gift basket marked, "Happy Birthday, Mifune!"

He took it inside and looked through it. He was pleased. "Mifune, you don't need to shave, do you?" asked Angela. "Not really." Mifune answered.

Back at the academy, Maka was sewing up Soul and Tsubaki was sewing up Black Star. "He just stabbed you?" asked Maka. "Do you like to read?" Soul answered with a question. "Don't start your little wise cracks!" snapped Maka. "Why is he doing that?" asked Black Star. "I don't know. He's been doing that for a week now. His wise cracks used to be based on cars, but he ran out so he's now he's on Soul Eater characters."

"Think he'll stop?" asked Black Star. "Does Crona deal with anything?" cracked Soul. "Ugh! Shut up before I purposly kill you!" snapped Maka.

After being sewed up, Soul and Black Star felt they would need Kid's help anyway. Soul did anyway. "No way! We don't need Kid's help! It's up to me to deal with this situation. We only have but today!" yelled Black Star. "Yeah, but I hate being at school on a Saturday." whined Soul.

They decided they would simply surprize Mifune. Little did they know, even on his birthday, Mifune was busy. He's been protecting Angela from a group that's been trying to kill her, Mifune as well.

After the samurai was finished with the said cake, he thanked the witch and headed outside. "How'd those guys know it was my birthday?" he wondered.

Black Star was at the top of Mifune's residence. Soul was with him. "Think it'll work?" asked Black Star. "Is Medusa evil?" Soul cracked. Black Star rolled his eyes and hopped down there. "Happy..." he started. "Birthday!" Mifune slashed Black Star across the stomach. "Black Star!" Soul paniced. "Black Star?" Mifune said, noticing who he slashed.

"What are you doing?" he asked. "To live!" cried Black Star. "Black Star, I can't mess with you right now. I'm got a gang of guys ready to kill me the witch. I've gotta keep an extra eye out for them." Mifune explained. "Now go!" He poked a whole though Black Star's shirt and flung him away. Soul followed him.

At that time, Soul went to Kid himself. He knew Black Star would never give in. "Having trouble as I predicted?" asked Kid, flashing an "I told you so" look. "Is your dad secreatly murderous?"

"Okay, what's the problem?" asked Kid. "Well, he doesn't seem to notice what we're trying to do. He keeps slashing me and Black Star." Soul explained. "Hm. Just get him a card and leave it at his door." Kid suggested. "But-"

"That's all I can say."

"Kid!"

"Don't yell!"

"Why not?"

"I said..." His heart rate went up and Kid passed out. "Crap! Someone help!" yelled Soul. Stein walked in. "Shhh! Quit yelling. It makes his heart rate go up." he whispered. "Oh. Sorry. Well, it went up. Now what?" asked Soul. "Nothing. He'll be alright." Soul looked at Kid. Blood ran down his mouth and his eyes were rolled up to his head. It wasn't scary because that's what usually happens to him when he freaks out. (As we should all know) He shrugged and walked away. Afterall, he wasn't dying.

Soul went to the store a bought a simple birthday card. It said, "D-day is here! Oops, I mean, B-day. Happy Birthday." Corny, yes, but at this point, anything would do. Soul snuck to his house without Black Star, wherever he was. On his way there, Soul noticed that Mifune was being attacked. About five guys were there. Soul wished he could do something, but without his meister, he was useless.

Meanwhile, the reckless Black Star took Tsubaki to his house in order to surprize him in a better way. (He wasn't really listening to Mifune and Soul was too far away to hear.) While Mifune was surprizingly losing his battle, Black Star flew Tsubaki around the area, hitting four members of the said gang.

"Black Star?" muttered Mifune. Black Star got his chain scythe stuck in the ground and Black Star flew around, once again hitting the enemies. Mifune looked in front of him and noticed that one of the group members were ready to kill him in on shot. Black Star drop kicked him away so hard, he broke his neck and saved Mifune.

When Black Star finally came to a stop, Mifune looked at him. "Black Star...you saved my life." he said. "I what?" asked Black Star, who was dizzy from all the spinning. Tsubaki was passed out. "You listened to what I said and helped me. Thank you."

"No...problem?" Soul came out and gave the card to Mifune. "Thank you...?" whimpered Mifune. "I'm his friend, Soul Eater." Mifune just nodded. "You kept slashing us when we were just trying to wish you a Happy Birthday." snapped Black Star. "I'm sorry. I was paranoid because those guys were out and I didn't want anything to happen to Angela." Mifune explained. "It's okay. We were the ones who sent you the basket, if you seen it." said Soul. "I seen it. I had it locked up because I thought it might've had something in it. Why did you put a razor and shaving cream in there? Do I need to shave?" asked Mifune. He rubbed his chin to see if he felt any hair. "Are you bad at sword play?" asked Soul. Mifune shot a look at him. "Ignore him! It was all we could think of. You don't need to shave." said Black Star. "Well, thank you very much." said Mifune, walking back inside.

Black Star had to drag Tsubaki home in weapon form because she was still knocked out, plus she was still super long. They went to go see Kid again. "You were right, Kid. Celibrating birthdays is hard." said Black Star. "I thank you for giving me a break from this horri-fic." said Kid. "I should get sick more often. Sadly, I'll have to take on the challange next chapter."

"Well, we learned our lesson." said Soul. "And I think Soul's out of cracks, right, Soul?" asked Black Star. "Heh. Can Asura create world peace?" cracked Soul. Kid's eyes widened and he started cracking up laughing. "Yes! I finally got somebody to laugh! I won the bet!" cheered Soul. "What bet?" asked Black Star. "I was cracking those jokes to make someone laugh. I have Kid busting a gut. I'm getting twenty yen!" Beeeeep! Soul covered his mouth. Kid was out again. "I forgot not to yell." he whispered, running out the room. "Aren't you going to do something about this?" asked Black Star. "He'll be fine, don't worry. He's not dying, remember?"

**Author's note: Yes, it's a short simple chapter. I didn't really come up with much for this and Raven didn't appear because the chapter was so short. But hey, two chapters at once! Raven will be in the rest of the story, wherever it may stop. (I'll be so upset when it does! -_-) I'll have to hold Twilight until I get a hold of The Simple Life. I'm sorry. If I don't get him/her by the end of the week, I'm gonna do my own thing and make it work. That's how I roll! Which reminds me, I'll be redoing Lord Death's birthday soon. He's one of my favorite characters and in my opinion he is way too funny to get a weak chapter like that so when it comes out, I'll let you know in the latest chapter. I'm gonna shut up now and let you review. Next, Medusa! Doing this for you, CTS! You've waited long enough! ^.~ **!**


	16. Medusa

**Author's note: Good news! I can work on Twilight now that it's the end of the week! Bad news, I promised CTS I'd do Medusa, but after reading it, what bad news?**

Raven was gracfully taking a shower. Right now, he was washing his wings. While he was doing so, Liz ran from downstair. "Move out the way! This gun's gotta go!" she yelled, pushing through Kid, who was trying to drink coffee. "Hi, Sis!" cheered Patty, who was waving at her troubled sister. "Can't talk right now!" Liz screamed back. She rushed into the bathroom and...you know the rest.

"I feel so much better." she sighed. "Don't flush, please!" yelled Raven. "Raven? What are you doing in here?" asked Liz, afraid to get up now. "Well, the question is what are_ you _doing in here. _I'm _the one taking a shower. You shouldn't barge in when the door's closed."

"Kid always closes the door to keep the house symmetrical."

"So you aren't used to knocking on the door?"

"I've seen Kid naked plenty of times. He doesn't give a damn."

"Uh...no comment. Okay, I must ask: Why?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"He doesn't abuse you, does he?"

"No way, I just, don't want to talk about it."

"Are you two in a relationship? It's okay if you are."

"No. Why are you asking?"

"Well, we're going to be together for a while, so I ought to get to know you."

"Well, that's private. You don't have to know about that."

"Well, you don't have to know what I look like without clothes."

"You don't need to know what _I_ look like without clothes!" Liz got up and dressed herself. Raven turned off the water and walked out. "What are you doing?" she asked, bugging her eyes open. "What? I'm finished taking a shower. One of the reasons I asked you that was because I wanted to know more about Reaper. If he's capable of abuse, then I want to be prepared. I want to know everything." Raven rapped a towel around him. "You mean, you're so caught up in your work, you'll deal with any bull crap he has for you?" asked Liz. Raven nodded. "I don't care what comes my way, I'll go through it. I've been dealing with it for a long time."

Liz examined his body and noticed there were bruses and scars all over him. "Wha...what happened to you?" she asked. "I don't want to talk about it." mumbled Raven. "Hey, if I'm going to be spitting out my business to you, I ought to learn about you." Liz pointed out. "Not here. I'd rather dress first. By the way, if you like Kid, I'd be careful. I think he's a homo sexual."

"What?"

"I'm not saying he is, but hey, you never know. He does look a little gay."

"Kid is not gay!"

"Well, can I get some privacy?"

"Oh...yeah." Liz ran out the bathroom. "Kid!" she cried. "Walked in on Raven?" asked Kid. "Yeah!"

"Well...I don't know what to do for you."

"Why is he still here?"

"Didn't you hear him the 30 times he said it? I'm his reaper. He's going to stay with me until he dies."

"I feel he's replacing us."

"Liz...I'll never replace you. You're my best. You're my one, my only." Liz blushed.

"Thanks."

"And I want to let you know that I understand completely."

"What do you understand?"

"Your feelings."

"What feelings?"

"Your feelings for Raven."

"What?"

"You have feelings for him. I understand."

"I don't care anything about that stupid bird! Don't you know what he said about you? He said you were a homo sexual."

"Liz, I am a famous Soul Eater charater, once noticed as a simple extra. I hear this stuff all the time. I'm used to it now."

"But..."

"If you really feel this way about Raven, go talk to him."

"How would you know if I like Raven? Obviously_ you _have feelings for someone."

"I just feel that you walked in on him on purpose. You pushed me out the way and Patty was waving at you. Obviously, Raven was in the bathroom."

"Shut up! That's not the reason. You like someone."

"NO."

"Who is it, Kid?"

"No one."

"Come on, you can tell me."

"It's not Tsubaki!"

"Oh? I thought it was Maka. You two would make a cute couple."

"Uck! No. She's too whiney for me."

"Well, you two have a lot in common. You're very smart, you're both organized, you both have anger issues and enjoy to beat up people or constantly annoy them."

"Eh, I still couldn't deal with the whining. Tsubaki's too quiet for me and you..."

"What?"

"You're whiney too."

"Who are you to call somebody whiney? You whine all day!"

"No I don't."

"Whatever, so who do you like?"

"I'm not saying."

"I don't know. Blair?"

"She's like twenty years older than me!"

"Angela?"

"She's thirty years younger that me!"

"Um, Medusa?"

"Are you serious?"

"Sorry, I'm just naming random women now. Wait,_ are _you a homo sexual?"

"NOW THERE _YOU_ GO!" Liz simply backed up and walked away. She noticed that Patty was laughing the whole way through, as usual. She saw that Raven walked out of the bathroom. She made a turn and noticed that the door was being swung shut. "Good morning, Reaper!" he cheered. "Good morning, Raven!" Kid cheered back. "Raven, want to talk about all those..." Liz started. Raven shook his head.

"Ready for school?" asked Kid. Raven nodded. He took a deep breath and followed his master to the academy. They meet Crona in the halls. He had a card in his hand. "Who's the card for, Crona?" asked Maka, who also came across the hall. "It's for Medusa. It's her birthday today." Crona answered. Kid snapped out. "Why would you want to get her a card? That evil %*#!" he blasted. "Kid, language!" cried Soul. "That shoud've come out of Maka's mouth!" Kid pointed out. "Well, I don't blame him. That's his mother..." Maka whimpered. (Severly tired; unrested)

Kid snatched the card out of Crona's hand and read the card. His eyes bugged open in shock. Many expressions spred across his face. He slowly handed the card back to Crona. "I...didn't know you could be so grafic." he whimpered, running away to throw up. "Right, he didn't read the poem of deep depression." said Maka. "I know, that thing was horrible." said Black Star.

Meanwhile, Free was reading something to Medusa.

"Medusa, in order to give you the best birthday ever, I will start with reading these deaths." he annouced. "Okay, they better be good." said Medusa, rolling her eyes.

"Death the Kid died by losing too much blood while freaking out about A-symmetry...  
>Lord Death died of old age...<br>Soul died because Maka hit him too hard with a book...  
>Maka died crying about Soul's death...<br>Black Star died trying to surpass God...  
>Tsubaki followed...<br>Stein died of lung cancer-" he started. "NO! Don't kill Stein!" yelled Medusa.

"Mifune died because he accidentally stabbed himself...  
>Angela died because some guy kidnapped her after Mifune died...<br>Liz and Patty died on the streets...  
>Sid died from rotting in the sun...<br>His weapon followed...  
>Giriko died because Justin Law killed him..." Free continued. "You can't kill Giriko either!" yelled Medusa.<p>

"Justin Law died from heavy music vibration...  
>Eurka died from blowing herself up...<br>Mizune died from moldy cheese...  
>And Joe died from poison coffee." Free finished. "How do you die?" asked Medusa. "Oh yeah, I died from severe stupidity." he answered. "Sounds about right. So what are your plans for me?" asked Medusa. "It's a surprize." cheered Eurka, coming from a dark alley. Mizune came out the same alley with and hopped on her head.<p>

"Just show me..." she muttered.

Back at the academy, Kid was back from throwing up. "Are you okay?" asked Soul. "I think. That'll be perfect for Medusa."

"Yeah, but we can't give her that." said Black Star. "Why not?" asked Tsubaki. "She'll think it's cute. It's coming from her son. She obviously wants him to be as nasty and as evil as her." Black Star pointed out. "We have to ruin her birthday in a different way, a way she won't even notice who it was."

"If that card did that to me, just imagine what it would do to her." Kid pointed out.

"True, but we can't look at it that way, we can't have her proud of Crona, making her birthday better." Kid sighed.

"I don't want to do it. You can, but not me." Kid started to walk away. Black Star grabbed him by his jacket.

"You still owe me for taking over Mifune's birthday." Kid sighed sadly. "Oh, alright, but you have to lead."

"Hell yeah!"

Free, Eurka, and Mizune lead Medusa to a huge cage. At that time, Black Star led his friends to the same cage. Well, it was more or less a safe anyway. "Ha! A present!" laughed Black Star. "Let's screw it up!"

"I can sense another soul other than the ones we see." said Maka. "What? Your own?" asked Soul. "No, Soul, I can sense it too." said Kid. "Let me take a look." (You'll never believe this: I almost forgot all about that; her seeing souls, that is. I feel pathetic, I deserve to die...)

Maka looked through the safe and saw a kishin soul. "It's a kishin!" she screamed. "Well, dammit, let's get rid of it!" yelled Kid. Liz, Patty, Soul and now Raven went into weapon form. "Don't. I got this. All I need is one shot." said Kid, preparing the Death Cannon and combining it with the Death Bomb. (Nice combo, Kid! ~.^)

He fired at the safe with a perfect shot. Medusa and the others were shocked to see the safe suddenly explode. When the smoke cleared, the kishin was revealed. He was pretty close to human. His skin was gray, he had dark brown eyes, and black hair. He had a blood red head band, a dark gray jacket, a black shirt, faded blue jeans and raggety sneakers.

"Yeah, Kid, all you need is one shot." teased Maka. "Oh, shut up!" whined Kid. "Leave Reaper alone! I'm sure he has a plan, right, Reaper?" asked Raven. Kid sadly shook his head and sunk to the floor. "Ha! You should've let the mighty Black Star take care of this demon!" laughed Black Star. Kid rolled his eyes.

"Is this my gift?" asked Medusa. Free nodded. "It's excellenct! Just imagine the things I'll do with him!" The students' eyes widened. "We gotta get that thing away from her!" snapped Soul.

"I loved the entrance." laughed Medusa. Eurka and Free looked up and noticed Kid and the others. As Medusa walked away, they cheered, "Thanks, Kid! You made it ten times better!" Kid walked away slowley. Black Star came up to him and stopped him.

"Hey! You have to help! I'm Black Star, who you called leader of this sabotage." he remarked. Kid sighed angrily. "I can already see this going to be bad. I don't want to take any chances." he said. "But taking chances is what makes this fic funny! Come on!" cheered Black Star, pulling Kid to another area.

While Black Star was planning something else, Medusa, Free, Eurka and said kishin, were walking to the next surprize. "Quick! We must destroy!" yelled Black Star. "No. Let's resolve." whined Kid.

The four walked to a canoe. "A canoe, huh? You could've done better." muttered Medusa, who was getting bored again. Black Star turned to Kid. "Okay, I need you for this one. Shoot holes in that canoe and I'll make the big finish: killing the kishin!" he ordered. Kid's eyes widened. "Black Star...you're taking my lead? I can't believe it..." he gasped. "No way, I'm taking my own lead!" Kid did as he was told and shot the holes in the canoe while Free was rowing. It threw them all off guard.

"I'm going in!" cheered Black Star, hopping down to get the kishin. He didn't really have a plan, he just swung Tsubaki and himself around until he hit the kishin. Medusa tried to attack too. She randomly threw vector arrows. Then it was Free and his ice. Next, it was Eurka and her bombs. While all this was happening, they were still sinking. Aparently, one of the blasts flew down to the bottom of the water. There, was a sunken ship. The blast was so powerful, it flew up to the surface, picking up the four enemies, but not Black Star. He belly flopped into the water. Medusa climbed to the top of the large boat and stood on one foot. "It's beautiful! I see everything from here! I rule Death City!" she cheered, feeling independent. Free and Eurka looked down at the water.

"Thanks, Black Star! You made this a lot better!" they thanked. Black Star couldn't swim, so Tsubaki got him out of that situation.

"Thank god you're alright. We thought you were dead down there." said Kid as Black Star returned. "Shut up!" he whined angrily. "Still want to go through with this?" asked Kid. "Of course I do! We still have time! Let's follow them!" cheered Black Star. Kid rolled his eyes and followed. "You notice how we didn't do anything yet?" asked Soul. Maka and Crona looked at each other and shrugged.

Black Star and the others sat in the back of the boat and waited to get to their destination.

"Raven..." Liz whispered. "Are you ready?" she asked. Raven sighed. "Sure..." he whimpered, pulling her to a different set of the boat.

"All the cuts and bruses are from past events. I went to a school that trains ravens to serve reapers. Aparently, we have a certain enemy. Those enemies are crows and buzzards. There was a raid of them that attacked the school. I stopped them, but afterwards, I fell unconcious and I woke up in a jail. I was captured by Crow O. Death. I was there in that prison for years and it took me forever to get out. I had no choice but to step up to Crow and kill her once and for all. The soul wave of a bird is stronger than humans' so when she kept soul waving me, I nearly died. I'll die if I ever suffer another powerful force." Raven explained.

"How do you know?" asked Liz. "Ravens have a limit to how many times they're hit like that. I've reached mine. One more, I'm done." Liz gulped. The boat came to a stop. "Watch your step!" Soul announced. "Kid got really sick and threw up blood all over the place. If you're not used to seeing bloody images, you might want to close your eyes and get the hell out of this fic."

The friends climbed out of the boat and found themselves in the front of a bar. "Are we even in Death City anymore?" asked Soul. "No. This is not Death City by a long shot." said Kid. They walked inside and there was a stage in front of all the drunken men.

"Oh, god, please don't be a strip club..." mumbled Soul. "Why would Free take Medusa to a strip club, Soul?" asked Maka. "I don't know. You tell me." Medusa was set in front of the stage, where she can see the next performers.

"So, who's performing tonight?" asked Medusa, now in a good mood. Free pointed to the stage. Out came a wizard, a bat dude, a Chucky doll and a guy with blue hair dressed like Freddy Kruger. This was the Magic Band of Terror. Medusa jumped out of her seat and cheered. "The Magic Band of Terror! How did you know this was my favorite band?" Free and Eurka looked at each other and shrugged.

"We just knew." they answered. "Well, I love it. This is the best you've ever been."

"All right, let's ruin it!" yelled Black Star, leading his group to the back. "Soul, Maka, this is where you come in. Fight off the guards while me and Kid sneak to the back stage. Kid will get rid of the singers and I'll take over the song. Afterwards, I'll make the big finish: killing the kishin!" he ordered.

"Don't scream out the plan." said Kid. "So where do I come in?" asked Crona. "Oh yeah. Ruin the table." said Black Star. Crona smiled. Soul and Maka did as they were told and fought their way into the back stage. Kid went to do his part, but there was one problem: the back stage was a mess.

"I can't do it. I can't do it. It's hideous in here! Look at all these boxes and ropes and crap. They're not even symmetrical like they would usually be. This...this...this..." he complained. Black Star passed him up to take over, but since Kid didn't do his part, Black Star ran out on stage with the band and started singing randomly. The wizard turned him into a frog and continued singing to Medusa. They were told it was her birthday.

"Kid, come on, we have to get Black Star!" said Liz. Kid was running around back stage, cleaning up. "Come on, you OCD freak!" Kid fell on the floor and started crying. "No matter what I do, it just never seems to come out right..." he cried. "It's the boxes. They're A-symmetrical and out of order. They're so abnormal. Why do they have to be so mangled?"

"Kid, it's not like this is your household! Come on, let's save Black Star!" yelled Liz. Kid picked up the two weapons. "_Now _we're talking." cheered Liz. "These boxes must be destroyed!" yelled Kid. "Nevermind..." Kid started to shoot up all the boxes. While doing so, he snapped one of the ropes and caught himself being hung on stage. He uncontrollably swung around and threw the bat dude on to Medusa. She got so excited she fainted. The bat dude was her favorite. They obviously trashed the performance. The wizard was extremly upset. He turned Kid into a cat and he turned his weapons into bunnies. However, Kid was still being hung. Now, he just looked like that "Hang on, Kitty" painting.

Raven ran on stage and cut Kid down. "Are you okay Reaper...or uh...Cat?" he asked. "Yeah, I'll be fine as soon as I get out of this cat form. Free and Eurka worked together to get Medusa out the bar. They looked at Kid and Black Star. "Thanks, you made this 100 times better!" they cheered. "Quit saying that!" cried Kid. "Where the hell is Black Star?" asked Soul. "I'm right ribbit here." said Black Star, hopping to Soul's feet. "What did you just say?" asked Maka. "I said, I'm right ribbit here!" Black Star repeated. "That's what I thought you said."

"Shut the ribbit up!" yelled Black Star. "Sorry, I don't know how to kill ribbits" laughed Soul. Black Star rolled his eyes and hopped on Soul's head. "Where's ribbit Crona?" he asked. Crona came from the bottom of Medusa's table. "They crushed me down when Kid threw the bat guy. Don't go around Eurka like that. She'll practically rape you." said Crona. "Ribbit figures."

"So what about meow me? Did I just say meow me? What the meow?" Kid mocked. "Kid's doing that on purpose. So, that means Black Star's doing it on purpose." Soul pointed out. "No I'm ribbit not!" snapped Black Star. "Why didn't you just hop in Medusa's dress or something. That would've ruined it." Crona pointed out. "You told me to ribbit stay away from Eurka. She was sitting right next to Medusa." Black Star remarked. "True."

"Come! We must see the last ribbit surprize!" yelled Black Star. "Wait, before we do, we should get you back to normal. I'll get you something for that. I've dealt with cases like this before. I'll be right back!" said Raven, flying out the bar. After he left, two guards walked up to the friends and threw them all out.

Meanwhile, Medusa came to, and she was coming to the perfect surprize. It had dark gray hair, a stich across its face, a white lab coat with a sweater underneath and a huge bolt in its head. (Do I have to tell you?)

Raven came back with the solution. Kid was looking at himself in a mirror. "I'm symmetrical!" he cheered. When the wizard turned him into a cat, he made the stripes on his head go all the way around. "I can stay like this for years!" With that said, Raven came out of nowhere and splashed the liquid all over him, turning him back into the A-symmetrical Death the Kid he used to be. He looked at himself in the mirror again and started crying. "I deserve to die!"

"Don't cry, Reaper. I had to get you back to yourself. I think you're better as a reaper instead of a cat." said Raven. "Really? You think so?" asked Kid. Raven smiled at him and nodded. Liz turned red in anger. "Now he's even cheering him up! That's the final straw!" snapped Liz. She walked to him and grabbed him by the shirt. "Look, you may take our spot in everything else, but cheering him up is crossing the line! Don't ever cheer him up unless we're not there!" she screamed. "Calm down Liz, I thought you hated cheering me up." said Kid. "I did, I mean, I do, but...shut up! Both of you!"

"But I'm not talking." said Raven. "Now you are, so shut up!"

"Guys, Free and Eurka have Stein! They're going to force him to date Medusa! They might get married tonight! We have to stop this!" yelled Maka. "Oh god, this is serious! Let's go!" yelled Kid. The group hurried to their destination. Stein was released to the witch.

"My lover..." she laughed. "I'll never be your lover. You're lucky these two were smart enough to get me while I was asleep." Stein responded. Medusa laughed again. "The least thing you could do is be nice."

Free forced Stein to sit down next to her. His hands and feet were tied together. Medusa rested her head on his chest. "I love you..." she sighed. Stein grunted as he tried to get away. Eurka came out with a bottle in her hand. "This might help you, Medusa." she laughed. It was love posion with a bit of K-Y.

The DWMA students made it. They didn't plan anything, they just charged to save Stein. "What are you doing here?" snapped Medusa. Soul and Maka picked up Stein. Kid took care of Free and Eurka. Black Star had Medusa, although Medusa just kicked his ass.

Kid got the posion off Eurka and ran with it. Medusa's birthday was spoiled! (Horray!) Soul and Maka untied Stein and Kid kept the posion safe for his secreat crush. Black Star was...somewhere. Tsubaki just followed Kid. Medusa didn't give up. She went after them. Mostly Kid because he was the one with the posion. If she got that to Stein, he'd be automatcally lured to her. She got close to him.

"Kid! Hand the posion to me!" Tsubaki suggested. "Okay!" Kid did so and threw it to Tsubaki. She threw it straight back, hitting Kid in the head. "Ow! What the hell...was that...about..?" he muttered, falling into a trance. "No!" cried Medusa. She targeted Kid with a vecter arrow. Raven jumped in front of it to save him.

"Raven!" snapped Liz. She imediatly ran to him. "Liz..." he muttered to her. "Yes, Raven?" He gently touched her face and pulled her close to him. "I love you..."

"I love you too..." Liz responded. With that said, Raven busted out laughing. "What? Why are you laughing? You're dying!" yelled Liz. "No I'm not, I just said that for you to admit your feelings! The scratches and bruises are from living in a cave for so long! Don't you know Raven's leave their young?"

"Raven...that's horrible. Your parents left you. And now, I'll have to kill you for scaring me like that."

"Where's Stein?" asked Soul and Maka. "We thought you had him!" snapped Tsubaki. She then looked around her and seen she would be only one to think this. "Well...I did anyway." Kid was intoxicated, Black Star disappeared, Liz was beating the crap out of Raven and Patty was laughing for no reason.

"As a matter of fact...where's Medusa?" asked Tsubaki. The three turned around. When Tsubaki threw the posion, it hit Kid and Stein. Stein ran off with Medusa to make another Crona. This was sad. Once everything calmed down, they all went home. Kid wouldn't get off of Tsubaki, but she didn't care. This was her plan in the first place.

"Hey, Tsubaki, we're gonna go now, and be careful, he's a reaper, you know." said Soul as he walked home with Maka and Crona. "I was bearly in this." he sighed. "We'll try again next time, okay?"

The next day, Stein woke up with a pounding head. He couldn't even twist his bolt because it hurt so much. "What the hell happened last night?" he asked himself. Next to him was Medusa. He looked around him and knew exactly what happened. "NO!" he screamed. (That's what you get for what you did to Kid!)

He ran back home to a screaming Marie. "Stein! Where were you? Who was it? I smell K-Y all over you! How could you live with me and then go out and do something like this?"

"It's not like we're married! And I was drunk!"

"Drunk men don't need K-Y!"

"It was given to me!"

"And you took it?"

"It wasn't my fault!"'

"Oh sure it wasn't!"

"Woman, leave me alone!"

"Maybe I will!" (There's your husband, Marie. That's what you're asking for...)

Kid's day started strangly as well. He was at home. Tsubaki wasn't next to him though. His head hurt worse than Stein's, being young and all. He didn't know about anything that happened. He slapped on a blood red robe and took a shower. Afterwards he went to the kitchen to meet Liz, Patty and beat up Raven.

"My head hurts..." he muttered. "I'm pretty sure it does." laughed Liz. "Hey, while you're still tired and not in your right mind, who was your crush?" asked Liz.

"An OC. Why?"

"No reason. Wait, so...you _are_ a homo sexual?"

"Not Raven. Mary Anne. She's so symmetrical and beautiful. I love her so much..."

"Uh...Tsubaki's not here, right?"

"No. I don't think so. Why?"

"Do you find being reaper exciting?"

"Yeah, the only problem is I have to stay a virgin until I do."

"Oh. Ouch. Hm..."

Meanwhile, Medusa woke up as well. She was feeling fine. Next to her, was a card. She picked it up and read it. "My, how graphic. This came from my son. Ah, he's growing to be a little bad ass like me..."

**Author's note: And it's a wrap! Medusa's birthday is finished! Review me and I will go on to the next one! Bum bum bum! Twilight! Featuring my loving reviewers! ^^**


	17. Twilight

**Author's note: Here I am in Death City with my meister, Colorado. I wonder what opportunities are here for us...**

**I am Mikairu [Mee-kai-roo]. I have dark orange hair, green eyes, and darkish skin. I wear a black suit with black pants, and black shoes. Well, that's what I usually wear. Right now, I have a white shirt and jeans. Same black shoes though. I am an axe. My meister, Colorado has red hair, black glasses, a Hetalia shirt, and blue jeans. I and he are exploring the world and Death City is our next stop. Maybe this time, we'll find a reason to stay.**

Lord Death was in the academy, feeling depressed. He was sadly looking at himself in the mirror. "Is it me? Or am I getting old?" he asked himself. His son walked in. "Hi, Dad," he greeted. Lord Death turned around and realized his son was in the room. "Hi, Kiddo..." he sighed sadly.

"Well, that's not your usual response. What's the matter?" asked Kid.

"I need your help. Everyone in the school is disappearing. They either die or graduate. It's depressing," Death explained.

"What am I supposed to do about that?"

"I don't know. I want you to give me some ideas on how to fill in the empty spots of the school."

"You mean, attract new students?"

"Yes, exactly."

"Dad, can we fix up the academy, maybe? It _has _been getting some dents and cracks ruining its symmetry lately."

"No. Only you would notice that."

"What do you mean? People like neat and nifty, some symmetry."

"No. One symmetry. You're the only one who likes symmetry. Think of something else."

"I don't know. Flyers?"

"Great idea. Get some of your friends and pass them around!"

Kid did as he was told and asked Soul and Black Star to help pass around the flyers he made. (Although it took him five hours to do it.) Soul flew around on his motorcycle, throwing the flyers around the city. When he missed, it caused people severe paper cuts. Black Star stood in the middle of the city and nearly cut people's arms off with them. Kid was on his skateboard, passing them calmly. They reported back to the academy when they ran out. It didn't go so well. The next day, Kid was called to the Death Room to be shown the headline of a newspaper:

_Paper Cut Terror Reaches Death City!_

The shinigami was very disappointed. So was the younger version of him, but he did convince him it was Soul and Black Star's fault. Well, it was sort of Kid's fault too. He should've asked Maka and Tsubaki. At least they had common sense.

"I'm sorry again, Dad..." Kid apoligized.

"It's alright, son. Here, here's a pencil and paper. Just write down anything you think of and let me know."

"Why don't you think of anything?"

"Because I can't! I'm too old for this! Now, if you think of anything, let me know!" Kid was sent home. His weapons were there to greet him.

"Hi, Kid. You look stressed," said Liz. "I am. I have to come up with a way to lure new students but I can't think of anything," said Kid. Liz shrugged. "Your creative mind will think of something," she assured.

Late that night, Kid's head hurt from thinking so hard, so he sat back in his room and turned on the T.V. "The King and I" was on. He caught it from the middle though. This performance was a musical and the song that was on gave Kid an idea. (To understand,  song/the-royal-bangkok-academy-t4664218 hit the speaker next to the title, and sorry it doesn't play the whole song.)

A few days later, Kid gave his father the idea and he approved of it completely. Soul, Maka, Tsubaki and Raven were called for the idea. A commercial. For one of the lyrics, Stein was called. The singers were put in a spot and Stein had to bang his head against a wall so he can twist his bolt. Blair was called as well to imitate a witch. Black Star included himself in to be the center of attention. Ox and Harver were called in to bring some cameras. All Stein had to do was smile at the camera and twist his bolt at the right line. Blair had to play dead at her line. Black Star just had to hug Lord Death. Soul, Maka, Tsubaki and Raven were set at the front of the camera. Music started to play. The choir sang:

We fight and fight  
>for a death god<br>At the Death Weapon Meister Academy

And kishin souls  
>are all we eat<br>At the Death Weapon Meister Academy

If we pay attention  
>to the whack job<br>who won't stop twisting his bolt

We'll kill a witch  
>to graduate<br>at our dear ol' school

The Death Weapon Meister Academy  
>Our future doom!<p>

After that, the video was edited to put in the twisting of the bolt and "death" of Blair. Lord Death also had a line. After the song, he comes up and speaks to the audience.

A few days later, a T.V. screen was set in the cafeteria. Everyone shut up and watched the commercial. It was different. Kid sung the first line solo then the rest came in. The participants were happy about that. (Except Black Star of course)

"Hiya! Hiya! I'm Lord Death, the founder of the academy. Here, we work together and risk our lives to make sure that your everyday lives are long and healthy. We fight of kishin who are demons that take human souls. If you depend on us heroes, your soul will not be taken. And don't worry, here, we make sure our students are loved and well taken care of. There is no man for himself. Please join us in our organization and you too can be a loved hero. If you don't have a partner, we'll make sure you have one."

The commercial ended. There was silence. "That commercial sucked..." muttered Soul, who was embarrassed for singing in the first place."I know. That solo was horrible..." Kid agreed. "I was barely in that commercial! I didn't even get a line!" screamed Black Star. "It was a waste of time..." sighed Maka.

Crona looked around and stood up. "Give them a round of applause!" he ordered. Surprised that Crona did anything at all, everyone clapped for the TV stars. It cheered them up but only slightly. Soul turned to Maka. "So do you really think it's a lure?" he asked. "Not really, but I hope so. If this doesn't bring in any students, I'll have to rack my brain for ideas again," Kid responded. "Don't lose hope, Kid," Maka cheered. Kid slightly smiled.

The next day, there seemed to be plenty of students lured in from the commercial. On the side of the stairs, there was an elevator for the children who were already students of the academy. They knew to go there because there was a sign saying,

**Academy Students Only  
>Those who wish to join, take stairs<strong>

"It actually worked," Kid breathed in amazement. "Yeah, these are a lot of kids," Soul agreed. "That sign's kind of cruel though. We get the elevator and they don't? Not the best welcome," Maka remarked. "Yeah, but if they want to be in the academy, its best they get used to coming up the stairs every day," Kid pointed out. "True." Everyone couldn't help viewing the hopefully new students in line next to them.

"Hey, it's the people from the commercial!" cheered a girl with brown long hair and green-golden eyes. She was rather tall with a slender figure with a small nose and full lips. "My name is Kuri Sari. I'm a weapon. I turn into a rifle with a blade attached," she introduced.

Soul looked at her closely. "I'm Soul Eater. Nice to meet you, hotie..." he smooth talked. Maka hit him with a book. Kuri laughed at them. "This is my meister, Sakura."

Said Sakura walked up to them happily. This girl was a cat. She had black cat ears and red hair. She wore a black shirt and pink jeans. Interesting character. She snatched up Kid and brought him close to her.

"You're the uncontrollably sexy soloist from the commercial," she laughed. Kid snatched away.

"Nice to meet you too," he commented.

"Wanna meet my friend, Twilight?" asked Sakura. Kid shrugged. Twilight appeared. She looked down cautiously.

"She's shy," said a guy who came next to her. "I'm Midnight," he said to them.

"Hi..." Maka whimpered.

"Yo! Who you talking to back there?" asked a girl in the distance of the crowd. She had black hair with a blue shirt and a black vest. She wore flip flops too. "Oh! The commercial dudes. I'm the Bird of Darkness! I turn into a pistol. This is my meister, Demioki," she said.

"Darkness, huh? Well don't think you'll be greater than me, the mighty Black Star!" yelled...well, you know who.

"I'll kick your ass. You better watch it," snapped Bird of Darkness.

"Yeah, you're in trouble if you mess with her," Demioki added. He was an Asian with shoulder length black hair. "Bird's hardcore. She _will_ kick your ass."

"Oh yeah?" Black Star challenged.

"Don't fight them now, Black Star. You're supposed to nicely welcome them to the academy, not beat them in," said Maka.

"Besides, I thought you learned from the first time..." Kid reminded.

"Shut up!" snapped Soul and Black Star at the same time. Suddenly, they heard laughter in unison. They looked around and then seen two cat like figures. One in black clothes, one in white. One boy. One girl.

"I'm Shio," said the girl in white. "I'm Pepo," said the boy in black. "We are the Mew Twins!"

"Quit being so weird!" snapped another boy out of nowhere. He owned spiky hair, a green jacket and black jeans. "Sorry about them. They're my weapons, bladed boomerangs. Shio and Pepo are they're names."

"And who are you?" asked Tsubaki. "I'm Simple Life. I know it's weird but...eh."

"Did you say those two were bladed boomerangs?" asked Kid, moving close to the twins. "Don't even think about it, Kid," said Liz.

"Students, get over here!" snapped Stein from the front. The new students waved goodbye, except for the shy Twilight.

"Bye, bladed boomerangs!" cheered Kid as he was pulled into the academy. "Bladed boomerangs!"

Everything was canceled in the classes for the simple fact that most of the staff was busy with the new students. Everyone was proud of Kid for his idea, but Kid could care less. He still wanted to switch up the academy.

The next day, all the people Kid and the others met were in Stein's class. Simple Life, Shio and Pepo sat next to Kid's left side while Twilight and Kuri sat on his right side. It was hard for him to adjust to. Above him was Patty. Next to her was Sakura and Bird. On her other side was Demioki and Twilight.

"Excuse me, soloist, but why are we sitting away from our partners?" asked Demioki. Kid looked up.

"Please, call me Kid. I don't why we're sitting apart from our partners, but I'll change that when I become reaper," he answered.

"Reaper?" Kid nodded.

"I'm Lord Death's son."

"Wow!"

"So...Kuri Sari..." Soul flirted. "Need me to show you around the academy?" Kuri shook her head.

"Thanks anyway," she responded as she looked back down at Kid.

"Damn...everyone likes Kid. This sucks," he thought. Stein was called out of the room by Mifune. Stein came back in the room with two other students.

"We have two new students. This is Mikairu and Colorado. They will also be new students. Give them a good welcome. Now," Stein introduced with no enthusiasm. Everyone greeted them the same way at the same time, except for Black Star who just screamed, "Welcome to the house of the mighty Black Star!" And after that, Kid just punched him in the face and Bird of Darkness followed by nearly massacring him. Therefore, he was out cold and Mikairu just sat next to her. Colorado sat next to Soul, still laughing at the incident with Black Star. Soul was still giving his attention to Kuri, who was shaking her head.

"Alright, everyone calm down now," Stein ordered, sitting down. Everyone did so.

"Hey, sexy soloist, can I let you in on something?" asked Sakura. Kid looked up again.

"Sure," he answered.

"It's Twilight's birthday soon." Kid's eyes widened. That word "birthday" haunted him anymore.

"Well, guess what, dammit, you're gonna be the one to celebrate it! I can't take it anymore!" he suddenly snapped. Twilight put her head down. Obviously her feelings were hurt. Now Kid had no choice but to make it up to her, and the way to do that...

"I'm sorry, Twilight. I'll throw you a dance party," Kid blurted.

"Really?" cheered Twilight with a spark in her eye. Kid's eyes widened again. He just realized what he did. There was no escaping now. He couldn't tell her no because that would hurt her feelings.

"Yeah, being Lord Death's son and all, you must have enough money to do it," Demioki added, who was still fascinated with Kid being Lord Death's son.

"Lord Death's son, huh? Then you must know a lot about the city," said Mikairu.

"What do you want to know?" asked Kid. Soul kept looking at Kid with envious eyes.

"Dammit! I wish everyone would ease off of him so I can talk to Kuri..." he thought. He turned to his side and noticed that Kuri moved next to Kid. At that moment, he got so mad he randomly started screaming. All eyes were on him then. Soul just looked at all the eyes on him and blushed heavily. Maka hit him with a book. As Soul fell out, Black Star woke up and the Mew Twins disappeared. Simple Life didn't care. He figured they went running around the academy like they always do when they go to new places.

"Shio! Pepo! Shio! Pepo!" they heard in the distance.

"What the hell is that?" Colorado wondered.

"Eh, it's Shio and Pepo. They like to run around new places and get to know them so I just let them," Simple Life answered.

"You should treat bladed boomerangs with respect!" snapped Kid.

"Why are you so obsessed with the Mew Twins?" asked Sakura.

"Let's just say, your sexy soloist is obsessed with symmetry," said Liz.

"So?" asked Demioki.

"If _he _had two bladed boomerangs, he'd be perfectly balanced," Patty explained.

Mikairu and Colorado looked at each other.

"Is this really the place for us, Mikairu?" asked Colorado. Mikairu shrugged.

"Let's just hope for the best," Mikairu responded. When he answered that, Kid jumped over his head to find Shio and Pepo. He couldn't stop thinking about their symmetry being ruined. Everyone laughed at him.

"So...that's Lord Death's son, huh? He must be on top of the class," said Bird.

"Not really," Maka corrected.

"Yeah, he's so obsessed with symmetry, he can't get anything right," Liz added.

"Tsk. At least he's smarter than Black Star," Soul pointed out.

"I heard that!" snapped Black Star.

"Hey, do I have to give you another beat down?" Bird threatened. Stein slammed on his desk.

"That's enough!" he ordered, shutting the whole class up. "Where are Kid, Shio and Pepo?" Kid entered the room with the twins in his hands.

"Bladed boomerangs!" cheered Kid. The room was silent. Kid put his head down and walked slowly to his seat, hugging the Mew Twins. Feeling loved, they hugged him back. Soul giggled.

"So...you still in love with the lunatic?" he asked Kuri. Kuri looked at him with a confused expression. She tilted her head and smiled.

"I wasn't in love with him. I was just interested. He was the soloist after all," she cleared. Soul's eyes widened.

"Really?" Kuri nodded her head. Soul moved closer to her. Maka pulled him back.

"I did notice that you were in the back," Kuri mentioned.

"You...did?"

"I didn't really hear you sing, though. You should let me hear you sing sometime."

"No way, but I'll play the piano for you." Maka pulled Soul closer to her angrily.

"He bearly plays for me," she thought. Crona tapped on Twilight's shoulder, startling her. Crona nervously crouched down.

"I didn't mean to scare you! I'm sorry!" Crona freaked.

"No, it's okay," Twilight cleared. "What did you need?"

"Oh, he was just going to say he's a big loser, just like you!" laughed Ragnarok. Crona pushed Ragnarok out the way and Ragnarok punched him in his head. Twilight just shook her head.

"Hey, Reaper, when are you going to stop hugging those twins?" asked Raven, who was sitting way at the top. "I'm your weapon too."

"Yeah, I forgot all about him! You're becoming self-centered, Kid!" snapped Liz.

"No I'm not! They're bladed boomerangs!" whined Kid.

"You can't have everything symmetrical!"

"Who says I can't?" The bell rang. It was time for missions. Simple Life walked up to Kid and snatched Shio and Pepo from his arms.

"I don't give a damn if you're Lord Death's son or not, leave my weapons alone!" he snapped.

"Why can't you be like that for us, Kid?" asked Liz.

"Would you cut it out? You're annoying the hell out of me," Kid blew off.

"WHA-" Liz stood there with the shocked expression on her face as Kid simply walked away. Suddenly, someone ran into him on purpose. He lowered his sunglasses and gave him a sharp smile. This guy looked familiar to Kid. (Description found in my fic, "Death 3")

"Disco Kid?"

"Yeah! How are you, brother?"

"It's been a while. How have you been?"

"Well, I was just taking a walk around the city and I never realized that you could sing until now."

"Oh god, that would capture your attention."

"You're a good singer, Kid, but I'd be more careful."

"Why?"

"That song is an imitation of 'Royal Bangkok Academy', from The King and I. That had to be one of the worst musicals in the history of the world!"

"Yeah...So, how long are you planning to stay here?"

"I don't know. After I saw you solo for that commercial, I was missing you. How have you been since...3?" Kid looked down sadly. His eyes started to water. Disco put his hand on his shoulder. "Don't worry about it."

"Well, I've got to get to my missions." Kid walked away. Sakura and Kuri just happened to be following him. He offered to show them where to go. Sakura stood in one spot, staring at Disco. Disco just took a glimpse at her and walked away. She remained in the same spot, blushing hard.

"And I thought the soloist was cute..." she thought. Black Star showed Mikairu and Colorado where to go.

"So, what all is there to know about this academy?" asked Colorado.

"Yes. All you need to know about the academy is I go here and I'm the best student and I am the mightiest!" Black Star answered. Bird and Demioki came from another part of the hall. Crona was leading them.

"You're so annoying!" snapped Bird. "How the hell did you get to hug Lord Death?" Black Star flashed a big smile and put his hands on his hips.

"Because I'm awesome like that!" Bird was getting really annoyed.

"When we come back from missions, I'm gonna kick your ass! Meet me outside!" she challenged.

"Yeah, right. I'm not gonna get beat by a girl!" laughed Black Star.

"I wouldn't count on it," said Demioki. Crona shook his head and continued to lead them.

"What was your name again? Black Star?" asked Mikairu.

"That's right!"

"I think you were called to the Death Room."

"When?"

"While you were screaming."

Soul and Maka lead Simple Life and the Mew Twins. Maka just happened to force Soul to be as close to her as possible, but Soul was still thinking about Kuri Sari.

"I wonder if he realizes how I feel about him staring at Kuri all the time. Maybe I can make _him _jealous!" Maka thought.

"So...Simple Life, is it?" she "flirted."

"I'm letting you know now: you're not my type, I'm not your friend and you need to turn back around!" snapped Simple Life.

"How mean..." the twins responded. Maka's eyebrows twitched twice as she picked up a book and slammed him with it.

"I'm gonna let YOU know something, you little punk! You'll _never _be my type, I don't play games and whoever smart mouths ME, get's the book!" she screamed, hitting him rapidly with the book. Soul had to pull her off. That caught his attention.

Everyone happened to take the same mission at once. Well, this wasn't on purpose, they just all came across each other.

"Hi!" cheered Soul, waving at Kuri. Maka elbowed him.

"Okay...all you guys are here. Where the hell is the kishin?" Kid wondered.

"Is that what we were looking for?" asked Bird. Demioki just sighed.

"I guess we can start fighting, Bird of Darkness," said Black Star.

"I guess so, Black Star," Bird responded. She pointed her pistol at Black Star while he pointed his scythe at her.

"GO!" "GO!"

Bird shot Black Star rapidly, knocking him hard to the ground. He didn't give up there, though. He got up slowly and charged at her. Bird dodged and shot him in the head. Angrily, he summoned the Enchanted Sword. As he tried to attack Bird, her and Demioki went in soul resonance and formed... (Not a cannon)...a tank!

"What the fu-"

Before Black Star could drop the f bomb, Demioki blasted dark bird missals directly at him. He was now in the middle of the ground, jet black in crisps with a big smile on his face.

The new students began to laugh.

"Why don't you guys think it's funny?" asked Kuri.

"Eh, we're used to Black Star getting beat up," said Maka.

"Yeah, I beat him up when I first joined the academy," Kid added. With that said, Kid and Maka felt a powerful force against their senses.

"The kishin!" they warned. The characters rotated in circular motion to find the kishin. Then, suddenly, they sensed a raging vibration which happened to be hard and violent. From that moment came an enlarged kishin from the ground, giving a loud roar and flashing his blood red kishin eyes. He sort of came out as a huge maroon blob with solid fuchsia rocks stuck onto its body. (Sorry for the heavy detail. Working on being an actual writer since I'm just thinking as I type.)

"Alright, let's get this over with!" yelled Mikairu as he transformed into an axe for Colorado. Kuri turned into a gun for Sakura.

"Well, time for some action. Mew Twins!" summoned Simple Life. The twins jumped up and formed into boomerangs. Simple Life held them as if he were Kid holding his guns, although it wasn't on purpose. As he did so, Kid did the exact same thing with Liz and Patty.

"Dude, why do you have to steal my stance?" asked Simple Life.

"Your stance? This has been my stance for a long time," snapped Kid.

"No, you just took it from me!"

"I did not!"

Everyone just ignored the two with sweat drops coming down their heads. Maka sighed sadly.

"Good thing I'm already transformed," said Bird. "Now let's kill this big blob of shit!" Colorado cocked his head to the side and smiled mindedly at the kishin.

"What's wrong with you?" asked Mikairu.

"Its checks are getting big and puffy...it's like a chipmunk or something..." he giggled.

"What the-"

"Chubby cheeks!"

"Colorado, don't just stand there! That thing's ready to blow!"

"What do you mean it's gonna...?" The goo monster started to shoot rapidly at Colorado and Mikairu, sending them running away.

"You idiot! I told you move!" snapped Mikairu.

"But he had chubby cheeks! CHEEKS!" The two nutcases ran off. Maka, Sakura and Demioki tried to hold off the small shots followed after. Maka ran over to Kid and Simple Life who were still arguing.

"Hey, you two might want to help us out here?" she snapped. The two stopped fighting for a moment and looked at Mikairu and Colorado getting chased by the ammo of the kishin. Simple Life threw his blades at the kishin as Kid shot rapidly at it. Demioki pitched in and started shooting as well. This drew its attention away from the two knuckle heads.

Even though the kishin was now attacking someone else, Colorado and Mikairu were still running, not noticing they weren't being attacked anymore. Maka tried to attack the kishin up close but her and Soul's wave lengths were off considering the fact that Soul was paying his attention to Kuri. Soul became really heavy and she fell straight to the ground, allowing the kishin to shoot at her. Kid noticed the kishin was about to hurt her so he grabbed Black Star's unconscious body off the ground and used him to shield her as there was still a big ass smile on his face.

"Yes, that's it! I'll make Soul jealous using Kid!" Maka thought. She grabbed Kid by the shoulders and pulled him toward her. "Oh, Kid, thank you for saving me!" she cheered as she quickly kissed him by the lips to show off. Soul wasn't even looking at her and the only one she made jealous was Tsubaki. She got out of weapon form and started choking her.

"Hey, chick fight," muttered Simple Life, smiling at the choking of Maka.

"Pay attention to the kishin, Simple Life!" snapped Demioki as the two were both attacked to the ground. They were now stuck in a bunch of goo they couldn't get out of.

"Now look what you did!" snapped Bird, forced to stay in weapon form.

"Think I coughed this shit up?" Simple Life pushed back.

"Why was Maka kissing during this crisis?" asked Shio.

"It was awkward indeed," Pepo responded.

"Yeeesss." they said in unison.

Mikairu and Colorado were still running.

"Where are we, anyway?" asked Mikairu.

"I don't know. Mexico, perhaps?" Colorado guessed, finally turning around.

"DUDE, THERE IS NO ONE ATTAKING US!"

Sakura looked around at the reckless students. How Tsubaki was choking Maka, how Soul was in the zone, how Kid was dumbfounded, how Mikairu and Colorado ran off, how Simple Life and Demioki got buried in goo, how the kishin wasn't phased by any attacks and how Black Star still had a big ass smile on his face.

"I guess it's up to us, Kuri!" she determined.

"Yeah, let's go for it!"

Sakura charged straight up to the kishin with her gun ready to fire. She and Kuri went into Soul Resonance and formed into...A LASER GUN! She fired straight in the middle, boiling its insides. While doing so, another student attacked it from the inside somehow and destroyed the kishin by making it explode. All that was left was a small black cat, holding a kishin soul. She looked down at it and turned around to walk away.

"Twilight?" Sakura muttered.

"Oh, hi, Sakura, Kuri," whimpered Twilight as she walked away with the soul still in her hands. Kid finally snapped out of it and realized all the fighting against the kishin was for nothing.

"So that's just it? She get's the kishin soul?" he growled.

"Unlike us, she actually destroyed the kishin so it's only fair," Kuri pointed out.

"Screw that, I'm getting another mission!" Kid marched away and over Black Star's body with Liz and Patty in his hands. Sakura shrugged.

"I guess we ought to clean up, Kuri," Sakura suggested.

"Yeah, we're the only ones left who are conscious...other than SOUL!" screamed Kuri, trying to catch Soul's attention.

"Huh?" he muttered mindedly.

"Come on, Soul, help us clean up," said Sakura. "You'll start with picking up your friends, Black Star and Maka."

"Whoa, I'm aware of what happened to Black Star, but what happened to Maka that fast?" asked Soul.

"Tsubaki choked her to death."

"Maka's...dead?"

"Not yet."

"Oh my god!" Soul went into human form and picked up Maka. "Where's Tsubaki?" Sakura and Kuri looked at each other and shrugged. Soul ran off as quickly as possible to get help for his meister.

"Let's find Mikairu and Colorado," Kuri suggested.

"What about Black Star?" asked Sakura.

"Uh...we'll come back for him."

Midnight was there too. He was with Twilight who was with Kid's crush, Mary Anne. They were up there watching the whole thing. They would've helped a long time ago if they weren't dying of laughter. Mary Anne went to pick up Black Star and bring them to the academy. Midnight already took care of Mikairu and Colorado. Tsubaki was pulled off by Twilight. They reported the story to Lord Death back at the academy. He didn't know what to say. He called everyone to the Death Room.

"Hello, father," Kid greeted.

"Uh...Maka's stuck with Stein right now," said Soul.

"Yeah...I kind of choked her to death..." whimpered Tsubaki.

"Black Star's gone too," said Sakura.

"That's because I kicked his ass!" cheered Bird.

"Sorry we didn't gain any souls," Colorado nervously chuckled.

"I don't think this place is gonna work out..." Mikairu sighed to himself.

"Hi, Kid!" said Mary Anne.

"Mary Anne? When'd you get here?" asked Kid.

"Oh, I was in a different class. I was wondering where you were."

"Don't make me choke you too, Mary Anne!" screamed Tsubaki.

"By the way, Maka doesn't like Kid like that," Soul blurted.

"She...doesn't?" whimpered Spirit who happened to be in the Death Room as well. "But she has to. I was hoping they'd get married one day."

"Uck! Hell no!" moaned Kid. Spirit grabbed him by his shirt.

"You got a problem with my daughter?"

"Hey, why do you want Kid to marry Maka and not me?" asked Soul.

"I've got a problem with you. A problem I'm not gonna tell you about."

"Oh well, that's alright. I'm love with Kuri anyway." Kuri's eyes widened as she turned to Soul. Soul saw her glare and his eyes widened as well. "Kuri...do you like me back?"

"No, not really," Kuri answered.

"You...don't?"

"No." Soul put his head down sadly. "Maka almost died for nothing..."

"Hello! I'm trying to speak!" Lord Death yelled, waving his hands for attention. Everyone turned to him. "Now tell me, what happened?"

"We all picked the same mission by accident and Twilight ended up getting the soul. We all pitched in to kill it...even though that went bad...so we should all get some credit," Kid explained, causing instant chatter among the other students.

"All right, quiet down. Twilight, do you still have the soul?" asked Lord Death. Twilight walked up to him and handed him the soul without saying a word. Lord Death gave her a happy glare and Twilight smiled at him.

"I didn't know what to do with it, so I just kept it," she responded.

"That's okay, Twilight." Lord Death took the soul and split it into eight for all the groups to have.

"Hey, where the hell is Raven?" asked Kid.

"I heard that was another one of your weapons, so you should really back off of mine!" screamed Simple Life.

"I'm really gonna kick your ass, Simple Life! You don't respect those bladed boomerangs."

"Kid, you don't respect us!" snapped Liz.

"That is a lie!" shouted Raven from behind.

"Oh, hi, Raven," cheered Kid. "You missed all those souls my dad gave away.

"Yeah, there's nothing I can do about it now," said Lord Death.

"It's alright," Raven cooled.

"I'll take you on a mission, okay?" Kid told him. Raven nodded and left the room with him.

"Well, you all better get back to class," Lord Death suggested.

Later on, Sakura notified Kid about Twilight's birthday. She said it was coming the next day, so he had to do something quick. Kid was now under a lot of stress. He didn't know why he shouted that he was going to throw her a party, especially if it was going to be a dance one. He didn't anything about dancing. He buried his head in his pillow as he thought hard about what he was going to do about the party. It had to be done by tomorrow, or else he would've hurt Twilight's feelings again.

He heard a knock on the door. It was Disco Kid. He found out about the birthday party and it was right up his alley.

"Oh. Hey, Disco," he weakly greeted.

"I hear you're throwing a birthday party. A dance one at that. I just decided I'd help you out for old time's sake," said Disco.

"I don't believe you. My theory is, you wanted to help for your sake."

"For our sake, brother." Disco rested his hand on Kid's shoulder and smiled at him. "Let's get started."

He explained to him that he already set up everything at the basketball court and all Kid needed now was a presentation, meaning his wardrobe and his dancing skills.

"I'm not a dancer," Kid muttered.

"Well, I may be an android, but I am a professional. I can turn you into dancer in no time at all. Take my hand." Kid nervously took Disco's hand. Disco quickly pulled Kid to his side.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"Relax. Feel the music."

"I can't do that when another man in this close to me."

"Calm down, I'm trying to teach you." Disco took a step and Kid followed. He took another step and he followed. Disco was using the music programmed in him but he felt the music and danced easily on the beat. Then he left it up to Kid to dance on his own. He succeeded.

"Now we just need something for you to dress in," said Disco Kid.

"Oh, I've already got that covered-" Kid started.

"No! That tuxedo you've got is nice but you can't wear it to the party."

"That's...that's not what I meant, I've got some nice clothes-"

"This is true, but do you know how to wear..." Disco opened up Kid's closet and he noticed that all Kid had to wear was either black or white. He'd be lucky to find at least one other color. "Kid...your closet's a checker board!" His voice changed.

"I've got other colors...I think. Want to see my gray clothes?" Disco shook his head.

"We have to find a color you look really good in."

"Kid is sexy as hell in white!" screamed Liz who happened to be there the whole time. Both Kid and Disco turned to her and shot her the same look. (Even though Disco had to lower his eyeglasses.) Liz slugged down in her seat and eventually left the room.

Afterwards, Disco tried to put Kid in different colors that didn't fit him at all. Meaning: orange, yellow, purple, blue and brown. Then he finally came to one conclusion...

"Alright everyone! I am the mighty Black Star! And until our host, Death the Kid gets here, I'm gonna sing a song!" yelled Black Star on the night of the party.

"Yeah, gave him too many ass whoopings," said Bird, shaking her head. She was in a black dress with separated black sleeves on and black flats.

"Uh...Bird you look..." whimpered Demioki, who happened to be wearing a tan tuxedo.

"Buzz off!" shouted Bird, playfully pushing him back. Demioki gave her a smile and Bird smiled back.

"Was Disco Kid invited?" Sakura wondered.

"Obviously, Kid and Disco are close. I'm sure he'll be here," answered Kuri Sari. Sakura was wearing a hot pink dress with two black bands forming an "X" around her shoulders, white gloves, black leggings and black high-ish heels.

(I forgot everyone's wardrobes so I am so sorry! *sweat drop*)

"Sing the damn song all ready!" screamed Simple Life. He didn't get dressed up. Shio and Pepo. Shio had a white jacket and a black shirt with white pants and Pepo was wearing a black jacket and a white shirt with black pants. Mikairu was in his black suit and Colorado was in one simular to it. Mary Anne arrived in the same thing she was in when she first appeared in the story. Twilight was wearing a short sleeve white shirt with a short black leather jacket and dark blue jeans. Midnight was wearing a normal tuxedo.

"I'm singing the song!" screamed Black Star.

_I wish that I can have this moment for life...for life...for life...for life...for life...for life..._

Kid and Disco rushed to the party as fast as possible.

"I can't believe you couldn't find the records!" snapped Kid.

"Doesn't matter, just as long as everyone dances by time we get there," said Disco who had a camera at the party. He took a quick look at the camera through his arm and watched Black Star perform.

_for life...for life...for life...for life...for life...for life..._

Disco's eyes widened. He was obsessed with music and dancing.

"No one's dancing! Not only that, but Black Star's just repeating 'for life' and calling it singing! This...is...a disgrace..." Disco zoomed as fast as possible to get the party. He and Kid made a big entrance with a lot of smoke.

_for life...for life...for life...for life...for life...for life..._

"Let the party begin!" cheered Kid.

"And for God's sake, dance!" screamed Disco, putting on a mix tape. Everyone started dancing and Disco was finally relived. A lot of the girls, even Maka couldn't stop looking at the way Kid looked in a blood red suit with skinny black lines coming down. According to Liz, he almost looked sexier than he did in white. Tsubaki ran to him immediately.

"He's mine!" she claimed as she snatched him by the arm and forced him to dance. Based on his training, Kid dealt with it and started dancing the best way he could. Disco was still in love with Liz, but Liz was in love with Raven so that's who she was dancing with, therefore, he danced with Sakura which was fine by her. Black Star didn't dance with anyone because Bird of Darkness killed him. Afterwards, she danced with Chrona. (who was a boy)

Mikairu and Colorado just chilled in the background and Simple Life hung with them. Shio and Pepo danced with each other happily.

"Hey, Kid, this song is almost over. Pick another song to play," said Disco, handing him a stack of records. He randomly picked one out from the stack. Disco turned around to look at what he picked and slapped it out his hand, causing it to break on the ground.

"Why'd you do that?" asked Kid.

"I don't even know where that record came from! It's sung by a white person!" snapped Disco.

"And?" Liz walked in on the conversation with Raven.

"Don't you remember Disco at all? He runs on black music and his weakness is white music," Liz pointed out.

"But, we're all Japanese..." said Raven. Mikairu and Colorado heard the conversation.

"Runs on? Weakness? What are they talking about?" asked Mikairu.

"I won't get it because I think I'm wasted!" laughed Colorado, dancing around with what looked like a cocktail. Mikairu grabbed him but the shoulders and shook him.

"Colorado! You are not wasted! That is a flipping fruit punch in your hand!" he screamed as he smacked him in the face.

"He's an android, guys," Liz explained, noticing the argument.

"Oh, okay. Don't sing, Colorado. Wait, you're the only white guy here, aren't you?" asked Mikairu, pressing his finger against his forehead. Colorado pushed it out the way.

"No. Raise your hand if you're white!" No one raised their hand. "Whatever. I'm a band player anyway."

"Well, come up here and play a birthday song for Twilight, Colorado," Sakura suggested.

"But what about-"

"My weakness is white people _singing_. You can play an instrument if you like," Disco cleared.

"Oh, cool!" Colorado pulled out a guitar and started playing "Happy Birthday" on it with his own mix to it. After the song everyone clapped for Twilight. This made her very happy. (I'm not racist, okay?)

"Do you like it, Twilight? Is it everything you hoped for? Am I excused for hurting your feelings?" asked Kid.

"You've been excused, but I like it very much. Thank you," said Twilight. Kid walked away and accidentally stepped on her tail. She went ballistic and slapped him in the face. Getting back up from the ground, he asked her to slap him again on his other cheek and she did so hard enough to knock him out.

Soul walked up to Kuri.

"Hey, Kuri, I know you don't like me and all but, do you want to dance with me?" he asked.

"I'm sorry, Soul, but...you've actually have been getting on my nerves all this time and I really don't want to be bothered with you anymore," Kuri responded. Soul looked in the air and screamed as she walked away. He was silenced by Maka who happened to be behind him.

"Wanna dance?" she asked calmly. Soul turned around and smiled as if nothing happened.

"Sure, that sounds cool."

Twilight got to dance with Midnight. This was the best night ever...

"Alright, everyone get ready for the 90 degree angle dance!" announced Disco. "Kick your legs up to a 90 degree angle!"

**Author's note: Well! Here you are! The most epic chapter! Phew! I hope each of you caught on to who you were and that I didn't get any actions wrong. Please excuse me if I did. It's all out of fun and comedy... Sorry for making you seem like an ass, Simple Life, I'm really sorry. And if you're a girl then...you have the right to hunt me down and kick my ass. HAVE MERCY ON ME! Review plez!**


	18. Free

**Author's note: Yeah, this chapter was inspired by a Soul Eater chat room video I saw on YouTube that -as super corny and boring and also by my friend, Kenzieee4. She's awesome. This one will be a lot better than that YouTube video I saw. It sucked. Enjoy!**

Chatter BOX Account

Name: Free  
>E mail Account: Wolfman<br>Username: Iceberg  
>Password: *********** (IloveMedusa) *Strong!<br>Re-enter password: ***********

Are you human?

**Gh132**

Re-type words Gh132_

**Create Account **

"Damn Medusa...now I have to do this on my birthday. I wish the academy wasn't the only way to go right now..."

Chat Room 4

**SoundSoul445 and Cool Styled Scythe log on**

**SoundSoul445: **Hi, Soul!  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: Sup. So...why'd you force me on here? We live together! We can talk face to face.-**oundSoul445**: Well, it's really boring over here in the library, which is weird, and I missed you.  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: Wait; go back to the part where you were bored at the library. _o  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: ...

**Iceberg logs on**

**Cool Styled Scythe**: I think you're falling in love with me. 0.0  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: *Severe blush* that is not true!  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: You hate it at the library, so you miss me instead...*glare of supision*  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: I think you spelled something wrong.  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: What?  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: Is this Soul and Maka?  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: Who the hell are you?  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: I am a friend...

**God Almighty Star logs on**

**God Almighty Star**: Ladies and gentle men, presenting THE ALMIGHTY BLACK * STAR!  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: Black Star, get out the chat room!  
><strong>God Almighty Star<strong>: Why should I?  
><strong>Sound Soul 445<strong>: We're trying to see who this Iceberg guy is.  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: I am a friend-  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: No, I want them to leave because I want to know if Maka's falling in love with me.  
><strong>Sound Soul 445<strong>: I am NOT falling in love with you!  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: See? You wouldn't admit your feelings for me with two other members logged on.  
><strong>God Almighty Star<strong>: The mighty Black * Star doesn't follow orders. I'll log off when I want to!  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: So do you want to?  
><strong>God Almighty Star<strong>: Yes, I do!

**God Almighty Star logs off. TheEndoftheWorld logs on**

**Iceberg**: I'm still here!  
><strong>TheEndoftheWorld<strong>: Hi, I'm Asura! ^^  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: Asura...?  
><strong>TheEndoftheWorld<strong>: You know me?  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: Yeah, it's us, Soul and Maka!  
><strong>TheEndoftheWorld<strong>: Oh, I haven't seen you guys since my birthday.  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: What are you doing on Chatter Box?  
><strong>TheEndoftheWorld<strong>: OH, I'm working on my new lifestyle of fun and happiness by making new friends! :)  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: What the fuck?

**DTK888 logs on**

**DTK888**: Hehehe...hi, guys...  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: Hey, Kid.

**TheEndoftheWorld logs off**

**Cool Styled Scythe**: Where have you been lately?  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: I've been at a war  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: Kid, what war?  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: Are you talking about the one with Asura?  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: That wasn't a war.  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: How do you know about Asura? A-symmetrical trash?  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: Did you just call me A-symmetrical trash?  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: Icebergs are HORRIBLY A-symmetrical!

**Black Blooded Sorrow logs on**

**Black Blooded Sorrow**: Ragnarok said I should be more social.  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: Hi, pink headed bitch!  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: Okay...Kid's out of it...  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: What else is new?  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: I want to know about the war!  
><strong>Black Blooded Sorrow<strong>: I can't deal with war.

**Black Blooded Sorrow logs off**

**DTK888**: It's a tradition. All the reapers of the world came together and fight to the death to claim my father's place. I won, but I'm a little fucked up.

**Dark Feathered Madness logs on**

**Dark Feathered Madness**: Reaper!  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: How are you logging on?  
><strong>Dark Feathered Madness<strong>: I'm using the one across from where you're sitting, Reaper.  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: Oh...well I guess things are more symmetrical that way.

**B&W polkadots**

**B&W polkadots**: Is that Kid I see?  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: For the love of God!  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: Uh...this isn't too good -.-  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: Hi, who r u? Hehehe...  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: Chill, Kid, chill.  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: Soul, shouldn't there be a period next to "Kid" and a capitalized "C" in "Chill?"  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: Maka, it's a chat room. Does it really matter? Get the hell out the library and talk to me in person. I still want to know if you're falling in love with me.  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: I am not in love with you, Soul!  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: Don't leave!  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: So...who's B&W polkadots?  
><strong>Dark Feathered Madness<strong>: And what does B and W mean?  
><strong>B&amp;W polkadots<strong>: It's me, Mary Anne. B stands for black and W stands for white. Black and White!  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: Hi, Mary Anne! I want to screw your fucking brains out! HAHAHAHAHA! In a symmetrical position.  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: You so blew it...

**Soundwave logs on**

**Iceberg**: This is pointless...  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: Yeah...I'm really fucked up. MUAHAHAHA!  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: Kid, get some rest.

**B&W polkadots logs off**

**SoundSoul445**: Well, I'm gonna leave the library now.  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: No! Don't go anywhere.  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: What do you want?  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: Who r u? cold a-symmetrical trash...  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: I need you to do me a favor.  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: But we don't know you.  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: No, but I know YOU.  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: O.O  
><strong>Dark Feathered Madness<strong>: Just don't hurt my reaper!  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: Please don't tell me you're the guy who threw eggs at me... -.-  
><strong>Dark Feathered Madness<strong>: I don't know. I threw eggs at a lot of people.  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: So how do you know us? Hmmm?  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: Kid, get some sleep.

**God Almighty Star logs on**

**God Almighty Star**: The mighty Black * Star wanted to come back on!

**9soulpumpkinpie**

**9soulpumpkinpie**: Is Death the Kid still here?  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: Hell yeah!  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: I'm trying to talk business with Soul, Maka and Kid!  
><strong>9soulpumpkinpie<strong>: I didn't know you liked cats, Kid.  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: I'll screw anything right about now.  
><strong>Dark Feathered Madness<strong>: It was the war. Excuse Reaper.  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: We know, Raven.  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: Shut the fuck up!  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: Um...Blair, you might want to go.

**9soulpumpkinpie logs off**

**Cool Styled Scythe**: Wait...how'd SHE get on? I'm freaking out...!  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: You don't know what freaking out is, dude.  
><strong>God Almighty Star<strong>: Hey! Someone talk to me!  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: Iceberg will talk to you.  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: I hate you all...

**Spare Star Chain logs on**

**Spare Star Chain**: Hey, did you guys hear about Lord Death's stolen item?  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: My father?  
><strong>Spare Star Chain<strong>: Yeah, some brown jewel of his.  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: That's MY symmetrical jewel! Who stole it?  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: ...uh.  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: You know something, asswhole?  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: Er-asswhole?  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: Yes, ASSwhole.  
><strong>God Almighty Star<strong>: Hey, all eyes on me!  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: Shut up!  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: Sorry about your loss, Kid.  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: I should probably get going.  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: No. Don't go anywhere.  
><strong>Spare Star Chain<strong>: Actually, the jewel was stolen by Medusa.  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: That bitch!  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: Looks like that's who you're after, Kid.  
><strong>Dark Feathered Madness<strong>: Yeah, let's get her, Reaper!  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: BASTARD! hghdhoebtgl ihponilf'bgcvi;swpbvos  
><strong>Dark Feathered Madness<strong>: Reaper, stop slamming on the keys!  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: Well...I'm gonna go now.  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: I think you have something to do with the crime.  
><strong>God Almighty Star<strong>: Let him log off so the attention can be on me!  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: nbdvshbgwg  
><strong>Spare Star Chain<strong>: Eurka Frog was caught during the process, but Free escaped.  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: gulp...  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: You keep making noises over there, Iceberg.  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: Speaking of which, what was the favor you wanted? -.o  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: I don't want it anymore! I was fooling around!  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: But you knew our names!  
><strong>God Almighty Star<strong>: I heard Medusa was making a new potion.  
><strong>Spare Star Chain<strong>: _I _told _you _that, Black * Star.  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: Uh...how does he know that stuff?  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: Tsubaki's a girl and she wouldn't do that.  
><strong>God Almighty Star<strong>: My awesome partner's good for finding information.  
><strong>Spare Star Chain<strong>: Just like you, Kid! We're meant to be!  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: Back off, bitch!  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: Kid!  
><strong>Dark Feathered Madness<strong>: It was the war ^^  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: I'm logging the hell off!  
><strong>Soundwave<strong>: Now I understand! You're trying so hard to log off because you know that you're Free, who happens to be working for Medusa. You framed Eurka so you and Medusa could get away with stealing the jewel and now you need to get her out with the help of the academy. You knew you couldn't meet them face to face, so you stole a laptop, hid behind the library for internet connection and contacted them through !  
><strong>God Almighty Star<strong>: Whoa...  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: How'd you know that?  
><strong>Soundwave<strong>: I've been logged on for a long time. I just sit here and read conversations because it's funny and revealing, like someone's love for a person.  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: ...  
><strong>Iceberg<strong>: How'd you know I was at the back of the library?  
><strong>Soundwave<strong>: Because I'm an android and that means I'm one hell of a hacker.  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: Hey, Kid, I'm at the library! Come meet me!  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: Hehehe...your ass is grass, A-symmetrical trash!  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: After that, make sure you get some rest, Kid.  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: NO! Sleep is not a symmetrical word!  
><strong>Cool Styled Scythe<strong>: "Symmetrical" is not a symmetrical word!  
><strong>DTK888<strong>: bknkl5 bfhdebes  
><strong>Dark Feathered Madness<strong>: Reaper!  
><strong>SoundSoul445<strong>: So...who are you, Soundwave?  
><strong>God Almighty Star<strong>: He's obviously Disco Kid.  
><strong>Soundwave<strong>: How'd you know that?  
><strong>God Almighty Star<strong>: _Now _you want to pay attention to me! Fuck you all!

**God Almighty Star, Spare Star Chain, SoundSoul445, Cool Styled Scythe, DTK888, Dark Feathered Madness and Iceberg log off.**

**Soundwave**: ...

**Author's note: Yeah...I knew this chapter was gonna be weird since the day it was requested. Oh well, I really don't have much to say today except...Blair was using a computer in Chubra Kabras. See ya! Review! Request! ~.^**


	19. Maka

**Author's Note: Hello, readers! I'm back, now able to update! Well, it's Maka's birthday, now, this is just a nice simple comedy and somebody needs to request somebody, because I'm running out. I still need to read Soul Eater the manga so I can take care of Jackie's birthday. After that, I'll be out so...request.**

**Here we go!**

"Dammit, I just noticed the calender. Maka's birthday is coming soon," Kid thought, feeling a huge amount of dread.

"I have to do something to avoid it. I have to avoid the terror of celibrating it."

"Why don't you celibrate it before it comes? That way you won't have to deal with the drama?" Liz suggested, drinking a slushy as she walked past Kid.

"Yes, Liz, thank you! But what should I do?"

"Why don't you make her a movie about celibrating her birthday?" asked Raven, who also walked past him.

"Yes! That's brilliant! That could blow me off for a whole year! Thanks Raven!" cheered Kid. Liz death glared Raven and turned back to Kid.

"Don't I get a thank you?" she asked.

"Oh yeah, thanks, Liz."

"Let's make a movie about giraffes!" screamed Patty.

"Uh...we'll try that on your birthday, Patty. But right now, it's about Maka, and I need a cast."

Kid then, started thinking about it and frowned up.

"There's also the script, the cameras, the lighting, the sound...and all that money! Ugh, I hate working with my friends when it comes to tons of money! I still owe all that money to my father and he made me start making my own money, which was taken whenever I was celibrating Blair's birthday, getting arrested! CURSE YOU, ASS FACE LITTLE KID!"

Liz sighed. "It's okay, Kid, we'll work it out," said Liz.

"Really?" said Kid, blushing and flashing those eyes at her.

"Reaper!" yelled Raven, waving a roll of cash in his hand.

"Whoa, where'd you get that?" asked Kid.

"I summoned it. I thought you might need it for your project."

"I LOVE YOU!"

Liz got angry and smashed Kid's head against the wall.

"What was that for?" he asked.

"If I came up with money, you probably wouldn't take it," Liz complained.

"Well, yeah, I don't know where that money came from."

"You know what, Kid?"

"What?"

"I think I'm gonna quit again."

"No! Don't do that! It's not even over symmetry this time. It's just...he's coming up with a lot of ideas."

"But obviously, you like Raven a lot better, so you don't need us anymore."

"NO! How about this: I'll fire Raven and I won't take his money! I'll even date you if I have to!"

"You'll what? I thought you loved Mary Anne!"

"I do! But I don't want to lose you!"

"Was Mary Anne a cover up?"

"NO! I swear! Please, Liz!"

"You don't have to fire Raven...I'll stay, but quit giving Raven so much credit."

The next day, Raven kicked himself out because Kid and Liz almost killed each other over him. Kid was highly upset and Patty couldn't stop laughing, but he realized that his two pistols was all he needed to be happy. And with that said, the two worked together to get cameras, lights, a cast and all those other things.

**Cast**

Featuring Spirit Albarn as himself

Raven the Bird as "Narrator"

Crona and Raganarok as "Mortal Enemy 1"

Soul Eater Evans as "Mortal Enemy 2"

Tsubaki Nakatsukasa as "Mortal Enemy 3"

Franken Stein as "Mortal Enemy Boss"

Starring Liz Thompson as "Maka Albarn"

Black Star as himself

and Death the Kid as Deth the Kid.

It wasn't long until the movie was finished. Kid was sure that the Maka would appreciate it. He just hoped that she wouldn't have the same reaction as Tsubaki, which was falling in love with him.

"Alright, now, how are we getting Maka to our little theater?" asked Kid on the day of her birthday, standing in the stage he built for Black Star. Him, Black Star, Soul, Tsubaki, Crona, Liz and Patty were there.

"It's _my _stage! So it's _my _theater!" snapped Black Star.

"_I _built it, so it's _my _theater!" Kid threw back, leaving Black Star speechless. Everyone looked around to see if anyone had any ideas.

"I can just tell Maka to come down here, but knowing her, she'd just ask a whole bunch of stupid questions until I have to give up the surprize just to make her shut up," Soul replied.

"I see...well, we'll just have to lurk her over here," Kid suggested. "Black Star, go steal one of her books and let her chase all the way down here."

"Hell no! I'm not taking orders from you!" yelled Black Star.

"Yeah, but someday, you're going to have to, so you might want to get used to it." Kid minded, once again, leaving Black Star speechless.

"Fine! It's not like Maka will be able to catch me! I'm just awesome like that!"

Black Star ran out the building to get to Maka's house. Through the back door he snuck in and took one of her large books and escaped through the front door so that Maka can notice.

"Hey! Where the hell are you going?!:" snapped Maka as she chased him out the door.

"Yeah! You'll never be able to catch me!" Black Star teased. Maka ran after him and hit him with another book which happened to be bigger than the one he was carrying and knocked him out. Gracefully, she walked up to him and got her book back.

"Where the hell is Black Star?" asked Kid, two hours from then.

"I don't know. I think Maka might've killed him," Soul guessed.

"I wouldn't be surprized. Those two never get along."

"But, you and Black Star don't get along either."

"True, but you act like I never killed him before."

"Why does it seem like he never stays dead?"

"Who knows? We need another plan to get her over here."

"Let's send a giraffe!" Patty cheered.

"That. Is. Impossible," sighed Kid after a moment of silence.

"Wait, maybe we can tell her that Lord Death assigned a special mission for her here," Liz suggested.

"Or, we can tell her that she was challenged here!" cheered Raven.

"YOU'RE MARVELOUS!" Kid screeched.

"WHAT THE FUCK, KID?" Liz burst.

"We'll tell her about the mission." Kid whimpered. "...although I liked Raven's idea better."

"I don't care, Kid! Use his idea! I bet you if he told you to eat a pile of shit, you'd do it."

"No, I wouldn't. Shit is a-symmetrical."

"Then symmetrical shit."

"Liz, I wouldn't do that! You just have to come up with better ideas."

"You don't even want to give me the credit of even coming up with one, Kid!"

"Alright, we'll vote on it. Who thinks we should go with Raven's idea?" Everyone rose their hands except for Kid, Patty and surprizingly Raven's.

"Liz's?" Kid, Patty and Raven rose their hands.

"Sorry, it's four against three."

"I hate you, Kid!" Liz screamed, marching angrily out the door.

"Hey, Crona," whispered Ragnarok.

"Huh?"

"I have an idea. There seems to be a bad situation between Liz, Kid and Raven. Let's solve it by killing Raven!"

"Killing Raven sounds like a fun idea!" cheered Patty.

"Kill me?" whimpered Raven. "Am I of that much of a disturbance?"

"NO! Not at all, Raven. Maybe the problem is that you're too perfect," Kid responded.

"Ah, I see. Well, after this film, I know exactly where to go."

"YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO!"

"It's okay, Reaper. I'll still be in Death City. I'll actually be closer than you think."

"_Then where will you be?_"

"I'll be-" Raven was interrupted by Maka coming in, ready to fight.

"Alright! Where are you? This may be my hardest mission: fighting without Soul, but I can take on any mission if I try-" she hollared, getting interrupted by Soul's

"Did you really think you'd handlea mission without me?" Maka blushed.

"What's even going on?" she asked.

"You're birthday." Liz came out next to Maka and stuck her tounge out at Kid.

"Yeah, I used my idea and it worked! Suck it!" she teased.

"Suck what?" asked Kid.

"Oh. Well, the point is, I came up with an idea that worked out better than you or Raven's."

"Bravo, Liz. I was going to use your idea anyway, but good job. You got her over here."

"You...were?"

"Of course. I just thought about it and I realized Raven's idea would've been a little complicated. I think you're getting jealous, Liz."

"You're just now getting to that conclusion?" asked Soul.

"Well, yes, because that's not the Liz I know." Liz blushed.

"Oh..."

"Anyway, welcome to our little production, Maka. I didn't want to get killed again this year, so I decided to make a movie about celibrating your birthday. Well, Raven and Liz brought the idea to me."

Soul walked up to Maka and gave her a seat in the front of the stage. Tsubaki handed her a program she printed out.

It read: Death the Kid in "Maka's Birthday"

"Roll it!" Kid commanded. Black Star started up the screen that happened to be set on the stage in front of where Maka was sitting.

**Death the Kid and Black Star in**

**Maka's Birthday**

**Narrator**: He was stuck in his house with nothing to do. The house that stood in the mist of Death City. Him and his female pistol. His name was Deth the Kid.

[He picks up a glass and drinks from it.]

**Patty**: Deth...I had no...idea...you...drank.

She was holding a book which held her lines so she wouldn't have to memorize them.

**Deth**: It's kool-aid, Patricia. Where's Elizibeth?

**Patty**: She...went...shopping.

**Deth**: I see.

**Narrator**: Deth was a proper man. Always dressed in a black cloak, usually clicked together with a Lord Death clip. No sleeves on it. Yet, there are long white sleeves sticking out from his white shirt underneath. He also wore extra dark gray pants. He treated his weapons well at all times, and made sure that if something were ever to be on one side, it would be on the other. But the most important part was that he made sure that each birthday he was aware of would be filled with joy and happiness, even if that didn't necessarily mean him.

[Deth starts to walk outside.]

**Patty**: Where...are you...going?

**Deth**: Just going for a walk, Patricia. Just a walk.

[He walks outside in the darkness. He is suddenly surrounded by kishin.]

**Deth**: Damn. I always have to deal with this.

[He kills the most of the kishin except one which is behind his back. He turns. He's stunned. Black Star appears.]

**Black Star**: Yahoo! Here's comes the mighty Black Star!

[He kills off the kishin nice and easily.]

**Deth**: Thank you. Who are you?

**Black Star**: How could you not know? I'm the mighty Black Star!

**Deth**: Okay. I'll call you Black Star. You look highly annoying, but since you saved my life, I guess I can live with that.

**Black Star**: So, where were you planning to go?

(Walking away)

**Deth**: Why do you care?

(Following him)

**Black Star**: Are you pissy because you almost died?

**Deth**: No, I'm pissy because you're following me.

**Black Star**: I saved your life, you know.

**Deth**: Yes, I'm aware of that.

**Black Star**: Then what's the matter with you?

**Deth**: Will you piss off?

**Black Star**: Not until you tell me what's wrong.

(Stopping and turning to Black Star)

**Deth**: Look, it's my girlfriend, okay? It's her birthday and I don't have anything for her.

[His phone rings. He answers. I don't think I had to tell you.]

**Deth**: Hello? What? Wait, who is this? Patricia, is that you? Hello? Patricia!

**Black Star**: Who was that?

**Deth**: I don't know. My girlfriend. She's...

**Black Star**: Dead? That's too bad. Well, sorry I couldn't save her life, like I did yours.

**Deth**: She's not dead, you idiot! Well...at least I hope not...

**Black Star**: Well, sorry for you loss. I really wish I was able to do something about it.

**Deth**: Cut that out! She's not dead!

**Black Star**: Who's the unlucky girl, anyway?

**Deth**: Unlucky?

**Black Star**: Well, yeah. Who would want to date someone like you?

**Deth**: Well I feel sorry for the sap dating you right now!

**Black Star**: Actually I'm single.

**Deth**: Ha! Therefore you can't talk about me or my girlfriend!

**Black Star**: I meant, I'm a single star! The one and only. A girlfriend would slow me down. Like how your's is slowing you down. You almost got killed by one of the weakest enemies in Death City: a kishin! Ha!

**Deth**: Black Star, a kishin is not a weak opponant.

**Black Star**: Then what is?

[Mortal Enemy 1 appears]

**MEO**: A cool guy like me. Your first mortal enemy.

**Deth**: Mortal enemy?

**Black Star**: An Emmy! Yahoo! That's what makes me awesome! My first Emmy!

[Starts crying in happiness]

(Choking MEO)

I want to thank me, myself and I! Thank you! Thank you so much!

(Running up to the two)

**Deth**: Black Star!

[He punches MEO. MEO goes to punch Deth but he misses and trips him over, realsing him from Black Star.]

**MEO**: The boss depended on me and my severe coolness to wipe you out so he can carry on with his plan.

**Deth**: What plan? Was that you on the phone?

**MEO**: No, that was Boss. He wants to make sure that birthdays are never celibrated again...

(Walking away)

**Deth**: Fine by me. Carry on.

**MEO**: By killing anyone who happens to have one!

**Black Star**: Heh, I guess we're just all doomed, huh? Well, not me. I'm too awesome!

[He goes after MEO and tries to attack him. MEO's arm turns into a scythe and stabbs him.]

**Deth**: Aw, dammit!

[He takes out MEO to release Black Star.]

(While standing on his head)

**Deth**: Now, what the hell are you talking about?

**MEO**: Some red head with blue eyes told us that our next victim owned a heroic boyfriend who could save her. His name was Deth the Kid. Is that who you are?

**Deth**: Perhaps.

[He crushes his head to kill him.]

**Black Star**: So...your name's Deth? D-E-T-H? Wouldn't that be more or less a girl's name?

**Deth**: Shut the hell up! My girlfriends in trouble and you're standing here acting like an idiot!

**Black Star**: I am not an idiot!

**Deth**: Then quit acting like one and help me!

**Black Star**: Do you even know where you're going?

[Deth is silent.]

**Deth**: No.

**Black Star**: Like I said, sorry for your loss.

(Grabbing him by the neck)

**Deth**: Damn you, if you say that one more time, I'm gonna fucking kill you!

**Black Star**: Alright, I'm sorry. So what's the plan? How are you getting to Boss?

**Deth**: I don't know yet. Obviously I don't have much time. Boss has her already.

**Black Star**: Well, your name _is _Deth. Maybe you can pass off as Lord Death's son and ask him to track boss down with his mirror!

**Deth**: I _am _his son, but he doesn't like me to touch the mirror.

**Black Star**: Rip!

**Deth**: Rip what?

**Black Star**: You're a rip! Why do you get to be a god and not me?

**Deth**: I don't know. Why do you care? You act as if it's my fault.

**Black Star**: I have always wanted to surpass the gods, and you _are _a god. That's not fair!

**Deth**: Well, you can kill me when this is over. Let's go!

**Black Star**: I thought you said your dad doesn't like it when you touch the mirror.

**Deth**: Yeah, but what do I have to lose?

**Black Star**: Your girlfriend.

**Deth**: Exactly! Let's go!

[The two start up to the academy and run into Mortal Enemy 2.]

**MET**: Hey, I'm not letting you get through to boss.

[Deth and Black Star walk past him.]

**MET**: Aw man, even in a movie.

**Black Star**: Hey, maybe we could've asked him for directions.

**Deth**: I know where my own damn father lives.

**Black Star**: I meant to boss.

**Deth**: Would you make your damn mind?

**Black Star**: You sure like that word. Damn this and damn that. You should add A to name, because you sure want a lot of things to be damned.

**Deth**: Shut your damn mouth!

**Black Star**: See?

[Mortal Enemy two runs after the two. Deth stops him with one hand.]

**MET**: How were you able to stop me so easily?

**Deth**: You looked unsure of yourself. It's easy to fight you when I know you're unsure of yourself. I hear your boss has my girlfriend. He's gonna pay for laying his hands on her. Starting with his mortals.

**MET**: Your girlfriend's probably dead already. He's pretty impatient. If you want to know where he is. All I can tell you is that he's close.

**Deth**: Close? Close to where?

**MET**: Close to here.

[He stabs Deth in his side. Deth falls over in pain. Black Star takes action. MET tries to stab him. Black Star kicks the shot out the way and punches MET in the face. Mortal Enemy three appears.]

**ME3**: I'll take it from here.

[She jumps into the scene, landing on Black Star's head. Deth walks up to her.]

**Deth**: I'm guessing you're a mortal enemy.

**ME3**: Of course.

**Black Star**: Hey! I thought you were injured!

**Deth**: I thought _you _were injured!

[They look each other in the eye, causing static to come out.]

**ME3**: Are you two finished?

**Black Star**: Step aside, Deth. You're a reck. I'll take this chick on.

**Deth**: I'm not a reck, but you can take over. I don't hit women.

**Black Star**: Wuss.

[He runs up to ME3 to attack, but he freezes as he looks into ME3's eyes.]

**Black Star**: I...I can't hurt her...

[ME3 stabbs him through his stomach.]

**Deth**: Black Star, no! You did something to him!

**ME3**: Yes. It's deep in my eyes. I tried to do the same thing to you, but...you're too good looking for that.

**Black Star**: WHAT?

**Deth**: I thought you were dead!

**Black Star**: What, you really thought that's all it'd take to kill me?

**Deth**: Well...yeah.

**Black Star**: But other than that, what do you mean he's good looking?

**ME3**: He's hot.

(In happiness)

**Deth**: Ahh...

**Black Star**: What about me?

**ME3**: Eh, you're the adverage cute, but him...I can't even call him hot, he's...SEXY!

**Deth**: Alright!

**Black Star**: No fair!

**ME3**: And because you're so sexy, I'll tell you were Boss is.

**Deth**: Okay! And all this time I thought being this sexy meant nothing!

**Black Star: Oh, shut up! Where is the guy?**

**ME3**: He's up there.

[They look up and notice that they were right next to the building she was pointing to.]

**Deth and Black Star**: Oh.

**ME3**: Just hit the top. He'll be there.

(Walking into the building)

**Deth**: Thanks. I'll call you sometime.

**Black Star**: How are you calling her?

**Deth**: I'm not.

**Black Star**: Good.

**Deth**: Now, let's head to the top.

[Deth summons his skateboard and flew all the way to the top of the stairs. He hears a cry.]

**Maka**: Help!

**Deth**: Maka! I'm coming!

**Black Star**: It's about time you spilled the girl's name. I thought I'd have to guess forever. What a stupid name. Do you have any idea how close that is to baka?

**Spirit**: Are you talking about my Maka?

**Deth**: I thought you were the red head the mortal enemies were talking about. Why the hell did you tell them about me?

**Spirit**: One: I wanted to scare them and two: I wanted you killed. I don't like how you date my Maka. I don't trust you with her.

**Deth**: You don't trust the world with Maka.

**Spirit**: You're damn right, I don't!

**Deth**: I've come all the way here to save her, and you still don't approve of me?

**Spirit**: No, I don't! You like to damn things too much.

**Black Star**: Told ya.

**Deth**: Shut the hell up!

**Spirit**: See? You did again. Hell.

**Deth**: You know what, damn you, I'm gonna ask her to marry me when this is done, just to piss you off!

[Deth and Black Star continue to go up.]

**Spirit**: NO! She'll never say "yes!"

[The two partners make it to the top and find Boss standing in front of Maka.]

**Boss**: So, you must've come for an appointment as well.

**Deth**: Hand her over, Boss! Let Maka go!

**Maka**: Deth, you came for me!

(Accidentally whimpering)

**Kid**: I love being called "Death"

**Deth**: I got you, Maka!

**Black Star**: So do I, Baka!

(Hitting him in the back of his head)

**Deth**: It's Maka, dumbass!

[Boss hops in a chair and rolls over with a scalpel.]

**Deth**: No way am I going to be stabbed again!

[Deth kicks him out the chair as Black Star tries to untie Maka. Meanwhile, Boss lands directly on him, running his head on the table Maka was lying on and knocking him out.]

**Deth**: Sorry, Maka!

**Maka**: It's okay...

[Boss gets back up and soul waves him.]

**Maka**: Deth, no!

[Deth stuggles to get up as Boss tries to get him wiht the scalpel.]

**Boss**: Yes, I see your soul. You're a reaper. That would make an interesting operation.

[He slightly presses the blade on to his side.]

**Boss**: Watch carefully, Maka.

**Maka**: Deth! Please, don't kill him!

[He starts to cut Deth's side.]

**Deth**: Wait. Operate on Black Star. He's not a reaper but, at least he's already unconsious.

**Boss**: Hm...you're right.

**Deth**: Now, please, cut my other side the same way you did this one.

[Maka sighs.]

**Boss**: Uh...

**Deth**: I can't walk around with a scar one side of my body. That's too brutal.

**Boss**: Um. Okay.

[He slits Deth's other side.]

**Deth**: ...thanks...

[Deth punches Boss in the stomach and pushes him away. He runs over to Maka and unties her quickly.]

**Maka**: Oh, Deth. Thank you.

**Deth**: It was no trouble. I'll do anything for you. I love you, Liz-I mean Maka! Maka! Your name is Maka! Heh. Heh. heh.

**Maka**: I love you too, Deth.

(Coming from nowhere)

**Spirit**: Don't you marry him, Maka! He's not the right one for you!

**Maka**: Yeah, marrying you sounds like a good idea.

**Spirit**: NO! NO! Say no!

**Deth**: Yes, let's get married.

(Crying)

**Spirit**: Why...?

[Deth and Maka kiss to end the movie while Spirit is still crying.]

**Directed by Death the Kid**

**A Soul Eater short film**

Maka clapped in happiness as the movie ended. Kid came up on stage and took a bow along with everyone else in the cast.

"That was amazing! Thank you guys!" Maka cheered.

"What was your favorite part?" asked Soul. "It was my appearence, wasn't it? Didn't I look cool?"

"You died in the movie."

"So? I was still cool. Cool people die for the people they love...or care about."

"Yeah, but speaking of 'love,' this movie made me realize something."

"What would that be? How cool I am?"

"No. It's that...Kid would be one hell of a boyfriend!"

"WHAT?"

"Maka, you've gotta be kidding me!" cried Spirit, who happened to be in the straight up back with Stein who played Boss.

"Girls will be girls, Spirit. They go through hormones, just like anyone else. Now she's surprizingly falling in love with Kid," said Stein.

"Well, just as long as it's not Soul Eater. That damn boy..."

"Soul has a great bond with Maka. They'd be great soulmates as well as Maka and Kid would. Whoa, I just thought about it. Crona would be a good boyfriend for her too. Your daughter's in a tight spot."

"Quit making things worse for me!"

"Yeah...I got to kiss Liz. I will cherish that moment..." Kid thought to himself. Liz poked the top of his head.

"Yes?"

"I'm sorry," she sighed.

"It's alright. Well, let's finish Maka's day off, okay?"

**Author's Note**: And there you have it! Nice and simple! I got a request from someone. Liz's birthday is next! O.O. Review me! See ya later! ^^


	20. Liz

**Author's Note: You've been waiting for a while now, but I have returned. Here it is...the 20th chapter of HAPPY BIRTHDAY SOUL EATER!**

**(Applause)**

**And in celebration of the 20th chapter **_**and **_**the 77 reviews (unacceptable amount. This is a Death the Kid fic [with added in Black Star] There can't be two 7's at once) I am completing THREE REQUESTS AT ONCE!**

**(Wild applause)**

**And no one read Love Thy Reviewer on Wattpad...**

**(silence)**

**But I'm updating!**

**(Explicit screaming)**

**And now I'm shutting up and telling you the story.**

**(Silence. Someone coughs. Someone shoots that guy. Back to silence. You start reading now.)**

Kid cringed hard in his sleep as he thought of the previous chapters. The things he went through to put a smile on someone else's face. He woke up in a cold sweat and calmed as he thought of Liz, his weapon, who also had a birthday which was now.

"Liz..." he thought softly. "I can't let you down. You've been there for me ever since I met you, and I want to be there for you...because I love you..."

Da dat! Da dat! Da dat!

Tsunaida tamashii no hi ga

mune wo sasu nara

kotoba yori motto tsuyoi hibiki ga

ima kikoeru ka?

da da da da da da...ooops...

^^' continuing!

The young shinigami got up and dressed in a nice red suit with dark blue underneath and black pants and black shoes. (rawr, he's looking sexy in my head...!) Liz walked into the room.

"Well...you look nice. What's the occasion, I wonder," she joked.

"Oh, nothing. I just felt like dressing up," Kid answered.

"Today is the day. I'm going to tell you how I feel," he thought to himself.

"I've seen you celebrate everyone elses birthdays with pure success, now you're finally going to celebrate mine just as brilliantly. Is it going to be a surprize like everyone elses? You kicked Raven out for me. You should most defiantly do great for me."

"Hm. I'm still a bit concerned about him too. I wonder where he went. Hey, did you like him?"

"No, Kid! There's someone-well nevermind that. What do you have for me?"

"It's a surprize."

"You...don't have anything, do you?"

"Liz, you've always been there for me. Why wouldn't I have something special for you?"

"Okay, Kid. It better be good."

"It will be. Trust me."

Liz tilted her head and smiled at Kid as she started to walk back into her room. Kid smiled back and walked out the door, to prepare what he had for her. What he wanted to do was act like her forgot about her and then comeback to surprize her with a gift and his confession of how he truly feels for her. Until that moment, he was just going to take a walk.

Unfortunately, he ended up stuck in a parade for Mizune.

"What the hell is this?" he asked outloud.

"It's a parade for Mizune! Today's her birthday!" cheered Eurka who came completely out of nowhere. "Hey, I remember when you celebrated Lady Medusa's birthday so perfectly. You should do the same with Mizune."

"No. My father would kill me."

"No he wouldn't! You're dad's not going to find out."

"We're against you anyway, why would I want to celebrate Mizune's birthday? How would I celebrate it? I don't even know what she likes."

"That's your problem." She surrounded him with large tadpoles. "If you don't do it, I'll blow you to bits and they'll be a-symmetrical bits that'll be placed out of order."

"NO! Okay, okay, what do you prefer?"

"Anything that satisfies her. Remember, you don't want to get blown to bits."

"Yeah...um...I'm going to get a present for her, why don't you stay here?"

"If you don't come back with something within an hour, YOU'RE GOING TO DIE!"

"Dying's not my problem, it's the way I die that concerns me, and blowing up is very unorganized. Just give me a moment to think."

Kid escaped from the frog who randomly appeared.

Meanwhile, two certain people tried to take Kid's title in the best one to look up to to celebrate a birthday. These two idiots were Soul and Black Star.

"Alright, you remember the plan, Soul."

"Yeah. We're going to be so much better than Kid."

"You mean _I'll _be much better than Kid."

"Whatever."

"Okay, it's Angela's birthday today. The mission is to give her the best birthday she ever had. Got it?"

"Heh, that'll be easy. We did it for Mifune, why not Angela?

"..."

"What?"

"I'm sorry...it's just...that didn't sound right at all."

"Shut up, Black Star! No it didn't!"

"Yep, it _didn't_ sound right."

"YES IT DID!"

"Ooh..._yes, _it didn't sound right."

Soul shot a look at his friend and started slapping him. Black Star slapped back. All the noise attracted Mifune who jumped in from the cut and chopped their hair and top of their heads off, gashing blood a mile in the sky.

For healing, they ran off to Maka and Tsubaki.

"Soul, Black Star, I don't understand why you keep messing with him," sighed Tsubaki.

"Yeah, you know he's going to cut you to bits," Maka agreed.

"We're trying to celebrate Angela's birthday," Soul explained.

"Angela's birthday? I thought it was Liz's birthday today."

"Liz? Liz and Angela have the same birthday? YES! We can most defiantly accomplish this mission now!" cheered Black Star.

"What mission?" asked Tsubaki.

"We want to be more awesome than Kid. By doing so, we're going to take over his job of celebrating birthdays. We knew it was Angela's birthday, so we went over to Mifune's as soon as possible so that Kid wouldn't get in the way, but now that we know that it's Liz's birthday, no doubt he'll be too busy with her to celebrate Angela's. HA! We remain extremely awesome!" explained Black Star.

"You leave Kid alone!" snapped Tsubaki.

"Yeah, Kid didn't do anything to you two!" Maka agreed.

"We'll leave Kid alone, when _you _leave Kid alone!" yelled Soul.

"Yeah, you know you'll never have him!" Black Star added.

"Liz is the one he loves!" laughed Soul.

"THEN LIZ IS OUR TARGET!" screamed Maka and Tsubaki in unison.

"No! We need her for a distraction!"

"Wait, if we destroy Liz, only one of us can have Kid..." Maka pointed out.

"Then we'll have to fight for him..." Tsubaki suggested.

"But when shall we fight...?"

"We shall fight...NOW!"

"NO!" begged Soul and Black Star as the war began over their heads. Maka kicked Soul in the face while Tsubaki slashed Black Star's stomach, both aiming at each other.

"Stop it!" yelled Soul.

"You're hurting _us!_" added Black Star, his cheeks puffed up again. The girls didn't listen, they were too busy trying to fight each other, failing by hitting their partners.

"Where the hell is Kid...?" sighed Liz back at home.

"Oh, Sis! I have a surprize for you!" cheered Patty. Liz looked over to her sister's side. Patty was holding up a stuffed giraffe with no head.

"Happy Birthday!" cheered Patty. A sweatdrop came down Liz's head.

"Uh...Patty, where's his head...?"

"Oh, it's a girl, I tried to break her neck, but all that came off was her head."

"Oh...how do you know it's a girl?"

"Duh, it has no penis of course! Besides, a guy's neck is easier to break." More sweatdrops came down Liz's head.

"You know, Patty, I'm going to pretend you didn't just say that and respond, 'thank you...'"

Kid was on his way back to Liz. He didn't want to stay away for too long. He ran back in to Eurka.

"Well...?" she asked.

"Oops...I forgot..." Kid responded with a sweatdrop down his head. Eurka started to surround him with tadpoles again. "Wait! I still have about 20 more minutes, let me get her something so you don't blow me up, and if you do, can you _please_ blow me up in a way I won't be so misplaced?"

"No! That's impossible you dumb itiot!"

"Fine, I'll go see what I can do right this moment, but I can't do much because I have to get back to my weapon. It's her birthday too."

"Huh? That's weird. Well get something for Mizune so you can do that."

Kid sighed and flew off with his skateboard. He was going to the store to get material for a slingshot. He was going to shoot her across the skies.

Meanwhile, Soul and Black Star somehow made it from the war between Maka and Tsubaki, which actually grew a little bit because some girls walked by and asked what they were fighting about and after explained, they'd join in and claim the Kid was theirs, cause more pain to the two.

After escaping they snuck back to Mifune's. They made posters of themselves to trick Mifune. They made sure they were really dark too so they could screw with his head. He went to attack the image while Black Star and Soul snuck in to find Angela. Surprisingly, they were successful in kidnapping her.

The two took her away in Soul and Maka's kitchen and released her in a chair.

"Who are you guys? Where's Mifune?" asked Angela.

"Mifune's fine. You're here to have your birthday celebrated by...US!" Black Star announced.

"But why you? Why not Mifune?"

"Mifune! Mifune! Mifune! Why is it always about...wait, Mifune?"

"Well, it's not like she knows Kid. I don't even think they've met, Black Star," Soul pointed out.

"What's going on?" asked Crona who came out of one of the rooms.

"Crona! What the hell are you doing here?"

"I live here."

"Oh yeah. Well, get out of here so we can celebrate her birthday."

"Why can't I help?"

"Because...I don't know, you're too young. Just go away!"

"Wow, you make it seem like rape."

"Rape? NO! Mifune!" cried Angela.

"Shut up! That man probably has some type of motherly instinct that he shouldn't have," snapped Black Star.

"Why don't you let Kid do it? He's been the one celebrating birthdays," asked Crona.

"We're trying to be better than Kid, that's why! Now shut up and have sex with Blair!" screamed Soul.

"Blair's not here, and even if she was, why would I do something like that? I don't get it. I can't deal with confusion."

"I don't know, it'd give you something to do."

"But that's gross."

"I'D fuck her!" screamed Ragnarok.

"Ragnarok!" yelled Crona.

"Are you yelling at me, you little pink-headed transgendered little bitch?"

"Wait, how would you fuck anyone?" asked Soul.

"Who knows? Let's celebrate Angela's birthday. Crona can help," Black Star responded.

"I don't want to help. I can't deal with other people's birthdays," whined Crona.

"I've got a present for her," laughed Ranarok as he licked Angela's face, making her cry harder.

"This is horrible! Crona, Ragnarok, leave!" screamed Soul.

"I wanna go home!" Angela whimpered.

"No! We are celebrating your birthday and you are going to like it!" Soul and Black Star put on weird, straight, angry looking faces and started singing...well they tried to sing it anyway, it was more or less screaming.

"HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY. HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY. HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY."

"MIFUNE!"

"Hey, little girl, I said shut up!" snapped Black Star.

"Mifune doesn't have a motherly instinct! He has a guardianly instinct!"

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean!?" screamed Soul.

"I don't think guardians have instincts, Angela," Crona replied.

"How'd you know her name?" asked Soul.

"You told me!"

"SHUT UP!" Ragnarok hollered, punching Crona's head in.

"Mifune!" Soul grabbed her by the neck.

"Hey little girl, SHUT. THE. FUCK. UP! We are trying to celebrate your birthday."

"Wow, Soul, you're most frustrated than me," said Black Star.

"That's because you are all pissing me off."

"Well you need to shut up too! Crona, while you're here, make her a cake or something."

"Mifune will be her any second!"

"Shut up about Mifune before his man-like motherly instincts kick in," Black Star commanded.

"I don't know if I make a cake. I can't deal with cakes!" cried Crona.

"You are going to make that cake, Crona! I'm hungry!" yelled Ragnarok.

"You just ate all the food in the house."

"What? What are me and Maka gonna eat?" asked Soul.

"I'll throw up and..."

"Do NOT finish that sentence, Ragnarok. That's nasty as fuck."

"Just make the cake, we don't have all day," whined Black Star.

"Well...how do you make cake?" asked Crona.

"READ THE BOX, STUPID!" snapped Ragnarok.

Meanwhile, Kid came back with the enlarged slingshot in a box.

"Oh, so you got the present for Mizune?" asked Eurka.

"Yes, I most certainly did. She should be the one to open it," Kid responded. Eurka handed her the box. Once it was opened, she sucked in.

"What the hell is this!?" snapped Eurka. Kid rolled his eyes and shrugged. Mizune was shot outside the box, way into the air. Eurka death glared him and started throwing explosive tadpoles at him. Kid rushed away on his skateboard, it was time for him to get back to Liz. He successfully avoided each bomb and to quit the heavy effort, he rushed to a corner.

"NOW I HAVE YOU!" she screamed, throwing explicit tadpoles at the corner. Of course, she wasn't hitting him, but to convince her, Kid threw his skateboard out. "Yes! He's dead! Now I have to get Mizune out the sky somehow..."

Kid sighed after the psychotic frog left the scene. He started to hear a lot of commotion from behind him. Little did he even notice he was an inch away from Soul and Maka's house.

"What the hell is going on in there...?" he wondered. He walked slowly over to the door and knocked.

"Holy shit! It's Mifune!" cried Soul.

"No, Minfune would've sliced the door open. I don't think he knows how to knock," Black Star stated.

He picked up a rolling pin from the kitchen and stood close to the door.

"Who is it?" he whimpered.

"It's Kid."

"Go to Hell!" Kid slammed the door open immediately, slamming Black Star in the walls.

"Okay, what are you two doing?" He glanced at Angela, who was forced to "enjoy" her birthday. "You kidnapped a little girl? How stupid are you two?"

"We were going to beat you!" explained Black Star.

"Wha-by celibrating...a birthday? You guys are taking it too far. And what's Crona doing?"

"I'm trying to make a cake, but we don't have any of this stuff," Crona responded.

"What? All you need is water and eggs, maybe butter."

"It's these long, complicated words. I never even knew they existed."

"Huh? Oh, nevermind, Black Star, Soul, get this girl back to her home before I do something to you."

"NO! This is _our_ night to shine! Take your gothic ass away from here! Angela, aren't you having a good time?" screamed Black Star.

"NO! I want Mifune!"

"Sodium aluminum phosphate...?" whimpered Crona. Kid rolled his eyes and walked over to Crona.

"What are you talking about? Look, it's just a cup of water, two eggs and cake mix, what's the deal?" Kid explained, showing him the box.

"Oh, I was looking the ingredients." At the moment, the oven exploded.

"AHHH! It's so unorderly!" Kid freaked.

"Where's Angela?" asked Soul.

"I over here," cried a muffuled voice. Angela was covered in cake mix.

"The way you were talking about the ingredients, I thought you didn't put it in yet," Soul replied, wiping the black off his face with his sleeve.

"I just put in random stuff," said Crona.

"Why didn't you say anything, Ragnarok?" asked Kid.

"I don't know how to make cake either."

"Wait, what's that beeping noise?" asked Black Star.

Kid looked down and noticed a tiny tadpole on his leg. He panicked and threw it out the door. It exploded.

"That stupid frog..." Kid muttered to himself.

Eurka was able to hear that explosion. She knew that it was from one of her tadpoles, so it gave her the idea that Kid was still alive. After rescuing her, she sent Mizune down to kill him. She came down as the human Mizune. On her way down, she ran into Blair.

"Black Star, I am going to kick your ass," yelled Kid.

"I want you to try it!" Black Star challenged. Kid grabbed him by the neck and slammed to the ground repetitively.

"Can I start trying now?" replied Kid.

"I hate you!" scremed Black Star. Kid slammed in further in the ground.

"I'll ask again, when can I start trying?" Angela tried to walk away from the three. Soul caught her. She ran away from him and Soul started running after her.

Blair was throwing pumpkins at Mizune as the two fought. Angela got caught up in the mist of it.

"Mifune!" she cried. At that moment, Mifune appeared to save her. He cut both Blair and Mizune. He picked up Angela and asked her who took her in the first place. She pointed to Soul, who froze in his place. Mifune death glared him and slashed him over 100 times in one second.

"You made this the best birthday ever, Mifune!" cheered Angela.

"Let's go home now," Mifune responded. Kid left the house, once again hearing beeping. He looked at his shoulder and noticed another tadpole. He panicked again and threw it to a random direction. That happened to be Blair's direction.

"Ah! I killed Blair!" he freaked.

"Hey, you sure did, well, that made this the best birthday ever!" cheered Mizune, turning back into mice and flying away.

A sweatdrop came down Kid's head. He realized that Liz's present caught on fire. It was too late to get another one now because the store was closed and he had to get to Liz as soon as possible.

He summoned his skateboard and started to roll off. He ran into Spirit.

"Kid, I was looking for you all over. Your father wants to see you," he reported.

"Dammit! Can he wait?"

"I don't know."

Kid rushed off to the closed academy to see his father. Somehow he found out about the celebration of Mizune's birthday and how Kid helped.

"How could you betray me like that?! She the enemy!" cried Lord Death.

Kid hopped up on Lord Death and grabbed where he might have a neck.

"Dad! It's a fanfic! I can't control myself! I have to get back home to Liz! It's her birthday and it's getting late! I've accidentally burned her gift, but I have to tell her how I feel!" he screamed.

"Whoa..." laughed Spirit, who was standing there the whole time.

"I understand, but you're not going to get her without a gift," Lord Death responded.

"You don't know her like I do."

Lord Death released Kid so he'd finally be free to spend the rest of the day with Liz. She was very disappointed.

"Liz...I'm so sorry..." he whimpered. Liz just shot a look at him, not exactly a death glare.

_Everything I was going to say to her is pointless now..._

"Kid, I was really counting on you. Patty gave me a headless giraffe and a little chocolate cake, but it wasn't any fun without you."

"Liz, I'm really sorry. You've always been there for me, and now I have this one chance to give it back and I can't even give you a present. I mean, I had one for you...but I accidentally burned it. I couldn't get another one because the store was closed. I had something else for you too, but it's pointless now. I never meant to stay out this late, it's just that there were so many disruptions. Please forgive me. I let you down. I deserve to die."

Liz tilted her head at him and smiled. She took his head and moved it to face her.

"You didn't let me down, Kid. I waited all day, but you're here now. You explained the present thing, and I'm fine with that. I never really wanted anything special. I just wanted you to be here, I mean don't get me wrong, I was upset, but I'm fine now. Besides, you let us live here. You're always there for me too. And uh, you can keep those clothes on."

Kid smiled at her.

"So...what was that other gift? It's not pointless."

"Uh..."

"Well?"

"Uh...I don't know..." Liz got closer to him. Kid started to blush.

"I..." Liz gently pushed him down. Kid started to sweat. "Liz..." She ran her fingers across his chest up to his hands.

"Tell me, Kid..." she giggled.

"Liz, this is awkward..." She moved closer to his face.

"I'll do it..."

"Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh..." Kid shut and started to kiss Liz the way she was about to kiss him. Everything went as planned...sorta.

Suddenly, Maka slammed in the door with torn clothes and mud on her face from the war of girls.

"HE'S MINE!" she screamed. "I won the war, now I can destroy Liz and take Kid over!"

"Uh...Maka, are you okay?" Kid whimpered.

"NO! I'M GONNA KILL YOUR WEAPON!"

Two hands crept slowly behind the crazed Maka. It was survivor Tsubaki, who wringed her neck and threw her out the house. The heavy force caused a breeze that closed the door. Kid and Liz shugged and finally kissed. They were caught by Patty.

"What are you two doing?" she asked. She was ignored. She laughed hysterically.

"They look like a little dog like that...or a horse. HORSEY!" She hopped on Liz's back, crushing Kid's balls, swung her hand in the air and laughed even harder.

"HORSEY RIDE!"

**Author's Note: All finished! That was th 20th chapter! And that concludes "Happy Birthday Soul Eater!" (Like that'll ever happen) I wasn't feeling too good about this. Things haven't been going too well for your beloved author. I got kicked out of school for talking. (Don't you love being the quiet one?) I'm a little scared that this won't be as funny. I was just typing anything that came to my mind. (I'm nervous as hell) Next chapter, Raven's Birthday...**


	21. Raven

**Author's Note: This is probably the most crazy stupid thing I ever put together next to my recent manga, "Antigone," (Not to confuse with the Greek Antigone, it's [an-tee-go-nay] about all my previous anime combined. It's funny as hell. No. I think this was inspired by a movie or something. I don't know what I was doing to come up with this. I'm still debating whether or not it's funny or just plain out retarded. For once, I **_**am **_**going to get ahead of myself and say... nope, forget just read the story.**

So...Kid and Black were walking to the academy together, disappointed for wasting their time in a movie theater, containing a movie that was retarded in their opinion. The reason why they chose the academy to walk to is because that Liz and Patty were told to wait for them there, and they ended up watching a movie.

The two ran into Stein on the way.

"You two look bummed out," he replied.

"We are," Kid responded.

"Yeah, it defiantly wasn't worth my time," Black Star added.

"Mine's either."

"What was it about?" asked Stein.

"Something about two people switching souls or bodies or whatever. It was stupid. Completely pointless," Kid explained.

"Yeah, that could never happen," said Black Star.

"Actually it can if two dead bodies are close enough," replied Stein.

"What?" gasped Black Star and Kid. Stein nodded. He took out a scalpel from his pocket.

"Look, he carries it in his pocket," Black Star whispered to Kid.

"Wanna see how?" he asked with a creepy smile on his face. Sweatdrops came down the heads of Kid and Black Star. They both started to back away slowly. Stein moved up to them with the scalpel in his hand. The two started to run but Stein caught up to them and stabbed them in the backs. They dropped dead.

"You two die so many times in this fic. You ought to be little cats. I don't even think you're halfway done yet..." laughed Stein, dragging the dead bodies to his lab.

He brought them in the lab and brought them both back...only Kid was Black Star and Black Star was Kid.

"Ha! Now I have your awesomeness, Kid!" screamed Black Star from Kid's body.

"Aww, I was hoping I wouldn't have to see Kid talking like that. Oh well. Enjoy," Stein replied.

"Wait, we never asked you to do this," Kid pointed out from Black Star's body.

"Good lord, you make Black Star seem so...intelligent...it's...it's creepier than me. I have to up my skills..." Stein muttered.

"Stein, this is stupid. Give us our bodies back, I can't make Black Star intelligent. That's like...that's like Maka on crack...and cocain...and meth...and everything else."

"Why Maka, though?"

"MAKA'S ON DRUGS? NO!" screamed Spirit from outside the lab.

"What are you doing here?" asked Stein.

"I was just walking by and Kid said that my sweet daughter was on drugs!"

"She's not on drugs, and that wasn't Kid. It was Black Star."

"What? He sounds...so...intelligent..." Spirit walked away slowly.

"Dammit, when you're in your own body, you appear to be more awesome than me. In _my _body, you can rule the world. This sucks!" whined Black Star.

"Kid...seems so...idiotic. This...this is too much..." gasped Stein.

"Ha! I can rule the world too, because you sound too...wait a minute! I'm not idiotic!" screamed Black Star.

"Stop talking, both of you! If you're going to talk like that, you'll have to leave!" snapped Stein.

Kid and Black Star left the room. They hated each other even more now.

"Ha! Now that I have your body, I can celebrate birthdays just as well as you and I can control the world," laughed Black Star.

"God, I don't like to see myself talk with your voice, especially if I know your voice actor is a girl," said Kid.

"Shut up! You're just mad because I'm going to rule the world with your body!"

"You couldn't celebrate birthdays like I can or anything else I can do perfectly well because you only have my body, not my soul."

"Ew, don't talk to me while facing me. You're voice coming out my mouth makes me look gay."

"Gay! Why am I being accused of this all the time!"

"Why are you getting so worked up about it?"

"Why are you?"

"I'm not!"

"Hey, Kid. Hey, Black Star," greeted Liz as she found the two in the halls.

"Ah, Liz, Patty. I'm sorry about this. Me and Black Star went to see a movie. Trust me, you didn't miss anything," Kid explained. Liz and Patty tilted their heads at him.

"Black Star...? You seem so...calm and intelligent..." whimpered Liz.

"He sounds like Kid!" cheered Patty.

"It _is _Kid. Stein switched our souls," Kid explained.

"But...it's so weird."

"Don't worry about it. By the end of the day we should be able to get our bodies back."

"You know, Kid...your soft voice is making Black Star seem sexy."

"What?! Kid isn't the key to everything, you know!" screamed Black Star.

"Black Star, you just make Kid seem so...young, naïve, and idiotic," Liz replied.

"Dammit! She extended it! You know what, Kid? I'm gonna kill you...again!"

"NO! I'm sick of dying! Besides, you were only going to kill me that one time, not even a second time."

"I killed you once, I can kill you again!"

"Black Star, where have you been?" asked Tsubaki who was walking through the halls looking for the two.

"Oh, Tsubaki, it's..." Kid started. Tsubaki pulled him over and took him home.

"Well, Liz and Patty, I guess it's just us now," laughed Black Star.

"Yeah, let's get out of here. Uh...do you even have the slightest clue on how to keep Kid's house?" asked Liz.

"Of course not! I'll trash it!"

"No, don't do that. That would break his heart."

"That's the point!" Liz took him by the neck and shoved him to the ground.

"I won't let you hurt Kid..." She looked at him.

"DAMMIT! WHY DO YOU HAVE TO HAVE KID'S SEXY FACE?!" she screamed.

"Wait, first you said that my body was sexy with Kid's voice, and now you're saying that I'm just...sexy?" asked Black Star.

"Yes, I can't help it. I...I can't even bring myself to hurt you."

"So...my good looks keeps me from getting hurt..."

"No, you idiot. I can't hurt the body of the person I love. I don't think Kid's looks is going to save your ass anywhere else."

"Oh yeah? I bet you if I don't say anything, the world will be mine by the end of the day."

"Black Star, Kid has no intentions to rule the world, which is why you won't be able to do that just because you're in his body."

"I'm talking about Kid in _my _body. His calm voice, and my excellent body together will have the world in my hands. If I don't say anything, they'll be no suspicion about the voices. I'll just act as cute and innocent Kid, while he rules the world with my body. Stein's going to switch at the end of the day. The world will be mine! Hahahaha! Yahoo!"

Liz punched him in the face. "Okay, that brought me to hurt you."

"It's fine! If I keep my mouth shut, the world will be mine by the end of the day!"

Black Star stood up and put his hands in his pockets the way Kid would.

"Come on, Liz, we should be getting home now," he tried to say softly. He voice was so enthusiastic it was almost impossible.

"I guess you have a point. If you didn't talk, I never would've suspected that you were Black Star," whimpered Liz, who was now getting nervous.

"Why, yes, of course, Liz. It's perfect."

"Holy shit, he's starting to sound like him," thought Liz. "This could go badly."

Meanwhile, Tsubaki was falling in love with Kid's voice, so he found a way to escape her. As he walked around, he met an old friend.

"Hi, Black Star!" cheered a fairly high voice. "I remember you. You were the guy my old reaper couldn't stand, although he did say that he still cared about you a little bit, he couldn't stand you. I'm not really sure how you could kill someone you cared about, but I guess that just proves that he couldn't stand you,"

"Raven! I get it!"

"Black Star, you finally matured. You sound like Reaper."

"I am."

"You're a reaper?"

"Yes, I mean, no, dammit..."

"Black Star, why didn't you tell me you were a reaper. I could've been working with you. Anything you want, Reaper*Two?"

"Wha-no! Raven I'm-"

"You're my reaper! I know. Let's go! Right now!"

"But-"

"Oh...I get it. You don't want me. That's...understandable..."

"Raven, you can stay, it's just that I'd have to clear with Tsubaki."

"Hey, does that mean Tsubaki is a reaper too, or is she just your weapon, like my last reaper's?"

"She's...just a weapon, but Raven, I'm-"

"Hey, remember when she had a huge crush on you? I don't know how I know that, but I do, and she had a huge crush on you, I mean, I could've sworn that woman raped you, or at least tried, but either or, she had a crush on you and a big one."

"Raven, I get it, she still does but, I'm not-"

"Aren't you mad about that though? She's your weapon. You should fight for her love."

"Raven, I don't like her back, I like Liz, but Raven-"

"Eh, good luck with that, Kid likes her too."

"How'd you know that?"

"He told me when I was his Raven. He almost choked me because he thought me and Liz liked each other."

"I know that, Raven, but-"

"How would you know that, Reaper*Two?"

"Because I'm-"

"You know, I'm not really worried about it. Let's go!" Raven flew off. Kid chased after him. After the two made it back inside with Tsubaki, Stein called and said that he was ready to return them to their rightful places.

"No~! Don't do that yet! Raven's here and thinks that I'm Black Star and that he's a reaper!" Kid yelled, but Stein hung up by then.

"You're not Black Star?" asked Tsubaki.

"Yes he is! He's my reaper!" cheered Raven. "What a great birthday gift!"

"Birthday?" Kid freaked. "No! That's why something as weird, crazy and stupid like this is going on! It's Raven's birthday now! I wish I would've known this sooner! I have to celebrate it after all he's done for me, but I can't do as Black Star!"

"Aw, Reaper*Two, you don't have to go out your way for me."

"Of course I have to. You're the best thing that ever happened to me...almost."

"Really? I was only here for a second. Maybe you're homo like my old reaper..."

"I am not homo! Why do you keep saying that?"

"It's the first time I said it to you. Oh well. I'm glad you accepted me, Reaper*Two."

"I didn't approve!" snapped Tsubaki.

"No, Tsubaki, you don't understand-" Kid started.

"Reaper*Two doesn't have to wait for anyone's approval!" snapped Raven.

"How outspoken, he became. After losing me, he most defiantly wants to keep any reaper he possibly find and for as long as possible," Kid thought to himself. "Oh, how I missed him...but if I took him back, then Liz...I wish I could do something. I have to do something for him."

Kid started to think of what he could do. He then thought of his father.

"Yes! It's perfect! He would most likely accept Raven! And when he does, he'll be completely satisfied for sure! I'm a good or what? Now, that's a good plan, but I can't do it as Black Star. Let me get to Stein so we can get our bodies back.

Little did Kid know that Black Star was using his body to become a nuance to Death City. He came to the conclusion that if he did talk, he could settle a bad reputation for Kid as Kid gave him a good reputation.

He did terrible things like scream at people, throw the skateboard to break windows and even paint kishin souls blue and make Kid seem evil.

Once the two were finally switched around, Black Star revealed everything he did to Kid.

"Yeah, once the news got out, I tried to convince your friends that it wasn't you, but they wouldn't believe me. No...you can't be more creepy than me...you can't be...it's not possible..." whimpered Stein.

"Stein, snap out of it! Everyone thinks I'm becoming a kishin!" yelled Kid.

"There's nothing I can do about that, Kid. You'll have to fix that yourself."

"But how? He's already gone, I don't know what to do."

"Just think about it. There's only one Death the Kid in the world while there's probably about a million Black Star's around."

"Hey, you're right. I'll have to use that to fix my situation. And if the news has already hit my friends, then I know my dad's pissed. I'll have to straighten things out, but first things first..."

Kid ran home to check on Liz and Patty. Black Star trashed his house and tied the two up in a corner with their mouths taped shut. Kid untied them and asked them what happened.

"Kid, you have to stop Black Star. He used your body to make you seem like a criminal!" yelled Liz.

"That was Black Star?" asked Patty.

"Well, come on, let's get him now."

Liz and Patty went to weapon form to find Black Star. As Kid searched he found a whole sky of ravens.

"Oh no, I forgot..." Kid whimpered to himself. "But that's fine because I, the mighty Death the Kid will bring an end to all of this!"

Kid stopped himself and shot a look saying, "what the fuck...?"

Liz and Patty looked up at him like, "what the mother fuck...?"

Kid put the guns up to his face and shot himself for sounding so much like Black Star.

"Kid, I know that was an awkward moment, but damn..." whimpered Liz.

"No, I can't sound like that...jerk..."

"NO! YOU DID IT AGAIN! YOU KEEP ACTING MORE CREEPY THAN ME! NO ONE CAN BE CREEPER THAN ME!" snapped Stein from nowhere.

"Why are you behind me?" asked Kid.

"I've come to destroy you so you don't break my creepy record..."

"Since when do you care who's creepier than you?"

"Since someone actually became creepier than me."

"What? You did it."

"That's why I'm undoing it...by killing you!"

"Whoa...it came from 'destroy' to 'kill.'"

"Hey, Kid, he looks like he's about to rape you..." whimpered Liz.

"Rape, yay!" laughed Patty.

"Liz, Patty, shut up!" screamed Kid.

"Yes...THAT'LL MAKE ME AN ETERNAL CREEP!"

"Whoa, back up, Stein!"

Kid rode away on his skateboard.

"GIVE ME THAT ASS!"

**Whoa...this is getting too weird...Let me start over.**

Kid, Liz and Patty were walking through the halls of the academy, running into Soul and Maka.

**Yeah, I actually did it. Your author is a weirdo.**

"Hey, Kid, I just saw Raven not too long ago," said Maka.

"Really? How is he?" asked Kid.

"He's doing alright. He said he found a place for himself, but he doesn't have a reaper."

"Kid, you didn't have to get rid of him," said Liz.

"No, we never would've gone past the last chapter if I would've kept him."

"Well, he said it was his birthday today," said Maka.

"Really?"

"Yeah, I saw him yesterday."

"I HAVE TO CELEBRATE IT THEN!"

"Hahaha! I'll celebrate it before you do!" laughed Black Star.

"No, that's what was going to happen in that crack fic up top, but I'm discluding you now!"

"You can't do that."

"Yes I can. This fic was originally mine in the first place and after this, I'm making sure this author gets the message and that the next few chapters are as normal as possible! Leave, Black Star, before I make you!"

"MAKE ME!"

***5 minutes later***

Kid forced Black Star underground.

"Wow, did you really have to go that far?" asked Maka who was standing behind him along with Soul and the other three weapons.

"Yeah, he can find his way out. Tsubaki, you might want to dig him out before he runs out of oxygen," Kid responded. Tsubaki ran up to him and hugged him.

"No, Kid! He can die! I want you! I love you!" she cried. Kid pushed her away.

"I'm sorry, Tsubaki. You'll have to give it up. I don't like you that way. The only one I truly love is Liz!"

"Liz...? But she didn't win the war..." whimpered Tsubaki. "MAKA YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO KILL LIZ!"

"Well, you didn't let me..." pouted Maka.

"Kill Liz for what?" asked Soul.

"Uh...hey, there, Soul, when'd you get here?" giggled Maka.

"I've been here since the beginning of the second try. Are you...are you _cheating on me...?_"

"_Soul, no! I would never!_"

"_Obviously you love Kid, so I guess I'll just...leave...!"_

_"Soul, no! I love you! I love you! I've always loved you!"_

"Holy shit, you do?"

"Uh..."

"Maka...I was just joking..."

"Uh..."

"You really love me?"

"Uh..."

"_Then I'll just have to date Blair...!"_

_"Soul, no!"_

"Why are they running?" asked Kid.

"I don't know, but I think Tsubaki got the point," responded Liz. Kid looked down and noticed that the hole was digged up and Black Star had escaped.

"Eh, just as long as he leaves me alone." With that said, a bird sat on his shoulder.

"Raven?" whimpered Kid.

"Reaper!" cheered Raven, going into human form. He hugged him. Kid hugged back. The two cried in happiness.

"You know, Raven, I have to admit, I missed you too," said Liz.

"Yeah, she was crying over you and everything!" joked Kid.

"I WAS NOT!" screamed Liz.

"I heard it was your birthday today," said Kid.

"You're going to celebrate it?!" asked Raven. Kid smiled at him and nodded.

"Come with me, my fine feathered friend."

Kid, Liz and Patty took Raven home and baked him a cake. Raven happily ate it with a huge smile on his face. Liz and Patty joined him.

"Alright, let's cut to the chase, since the author already wasted his or her time, I know you worked very hard to find a reaper and serve it for the rest of your life," Kid broke down.

"YOU'RE TAKING ME BACK!" cheered Raven who hopped up and hugged him.

"No, Raven. I would, but I have to consider Liz's feelings."

"I understand." Raven sat back down. "You don't want to reveal your homosexuality."

"GOD DAMMIT, I'M NOT FUCKING GAY!" Kid punched him in the face.

"I'm sorry, Reaper...or...Kid..." Kid tilted his head at him.

"You can...still call me that, Raven. I decided I'd take you to my father. He's a reaper as well as I am. What do you think?"

"That'd be great! Thanks, Reaper!"

**Author's note: And so...Raven went to stay at the academy with Lord Death! The end! Sorry this went so badly.**

**Death the Kid: Perhaps we need to have a discussion.**

**Author: Uh...**

**Death the Kid: The chapter's over. Let's go...**

**Author: Uh...no thanks.**

***pulls out death cannon***

**Author: We should get going! See ya later! ^^'**


	22. Crack Fic Moments

**Death the Kid: I'm so sorry. I'm so very vey sorry. Me and my author had the discussion by she got really mad at me and did **_**this!**_** I don't want to do this, but I have to because of the contract I signed with him, well, it's a short chapter, so I guess I can manage, but you have to understand, the author's nuts! Out of it! Psyco!**

***Author pushes him out the way***

**Author: Naw, I'm just bored. Presenting...CRACK FIC MOMENTS!**

Moment 1

Soul: I've always loved you Blair, even though you're taller than me and I hate it when you shove your boobs in my face making my nose bleed so heavily, I'd have to turn upside down to get some more blood in my head!

Blair: I never really liked you because I just wanted your body for sex, but that's fine too!

Soul: Let's get married!

Blair: Yeah, let's get married nine times!

Soul: But me and Maka killed you once and then Kid killed you!

Blair: So how many souls do have left?

Soul: I go to Ringgold, how would I know?

Blair: No you don't!

Soul: I know I don't it was a joke!

Blair: Well shut up and marry me anyway!

Soul: Let's do it ten times!

Blair: What about Crona?

Soul: We can marry him too!

Blair: And Ragnarok?

Soul: Yes! Our love is so strong, let's marry everybody!

Blair: Including the cats and dogs and whatever other animal are out there that I don't know about?

Soul: Yeah! Our love will never die!

Blair: Love!

Soul: Love!

Blair: Love!

Maka: SHUT THE FUCK UP!

(She takes an encyclopedia and slams both of their heads with it.)

Soul and Blair: Education...

Moment 2

Spirit: Maka...you. Have. A brother.

Maka: How'd this a crack fic moment?

Moment 3:

Ragnarok: (sobbing) Crona...I'm gay...

Crona: (eating cerial) I knew that.

Moment 4:

(In british accents)

Excalibur: No no no, _you_ suck up first.

Black Star: No, I insist. You should suck up first.

Excalibur: Why don't we both suck up?

Black Star: Sounds lovely. Who shall we suck up to first?

Excalibur: Hmmm...extrodanarily tough choice.

Black Star: Shall we say...Patty Thompson?

Excalibur: Oh yes, dark ball of hot gas.

Moment 5:

Liz: Alright, Patty, now's the time. We have to assassinate Kid.

Patty: Assassinate Kid, yay!

(The two walk up to Kid)

Liz: Ready, Patty?

Patty: Ready, Sis!

Kid: Oh, hello, girls!

(they moon him)

Liz and Patty: ASSASSinate...!

(Kid dies again.)

Moment 6:

Lord Death: It's time to settle this.

Medusa: Yes, it's time.

Asura: Indeed, it is time.

Aracnae: I most definatly agree.

Giriko: We just have to...get it off our shoulders.

Justin Law: Well, by all means, get to it!

Lord Death: (sobbing) WE NEED TO BE A FAMILY AGAIN!

(They all stand in a circle, holding hands)

All: (sob-singing) Lean on me! When you're not stong! Something something something!

Moment 7:

Death the Kid: NO! No moment 7!

Moment 8:

Black Star: Me and Excalibur are going to start sucking up to you...Raven the Bird.

(Raven becomes angry)

Raven:...I'M THE SUCK UP! NO ONE ELSE!

(throws Excalibur across the room Black Star runs and cries.)

Black Star: (super high british accent) Holy shi-ate!

Moment 9:

Spirit: Hey, damn you, talk already!

Justin Law:...

Spirit: Speak before I kick those earphones out your head.

Justin Law: I'm deaf now.

(Spirit kicks him in the face)

Spirit: FUCK THAT! YOU CAN LIP READ!

Lord Death: Profanity...

(turns to mirror)

Lord Death: I've got a call.

Liz and Patty: ASSASSinate!

Lord Death: ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **!

Moment 10:

Marie: Okay so...how many little boys have you raped?

Stein:...wanna get married?

Marie: SURE!

Moment 11:

Angela Leon: (super deep voice in slow motion) what...the...mother...fuuuck...?

Moment 12:

Medusa:...

Free:...

Medusa:...

Free:...

Medusa: Alright, let's get it over with, you're Crona's father.

Free:...YES!

Moment 13:

Kid: ...symmetry is so...boring...

(the world explodes)

the end ^^'

**Author's note: It wasn't supposed to be funny. It was supposed to be random.**

**Spirit's next! Normal style!**


	23. Spirit

**Author's note: Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone! Soul, what's your New Year's resolution?**

**Soul: I'm gonna be cooler than I was before.**

**Author: Oh...Black Star?**

**Black Star: I'm going to surpass God!**

**Author: Uh...Kid?**

**Kid: I'm going to be symmetrical~!**

**Author: I don't think you can do that.**

**Kid: ):**

**Time to read~!**

Spirit was walking with himself, knowing that nothing special was really going to happen, although it was his birthday. It's not like anyone really liked him, not even his daughter, (needless to say) Knowing this, he decided to celebrate it himself. He'd go out and do what he did best: drink.

Kid, Soul and Black Star went out to play basketball together, leaving Maka and the girls bored. Therefore, they decided that they'd go out themselves.

It was Maka, Tsubaki, Liz, Patty and Blair. They were going out shopping.

Meanwhile, Spirit was doing his thing. Drinking. Flirting. Crying over Maka. Stein walked in to see him. He had a jar in his hand and his creepy smile on his face.

"Stein?" Spirit whimpered.

"Happy Birthday, Spirit," Stein laughed.

"Oh, Stein! You're so nice to me! Thank you!" Stein handed him the gift he had in his hand. In excitement, Spirit opened up his present. It was filled with water and two little round things.

"Uh...thanks..?" whimpered Spirit. "What are they?"

"Your tonsils. I took them out in your sleep."

"I should've known. Last year, it was my appendix."

"At least you got _something _for your birthday."

"Well, Stein, this stuff was already mine. You're just handing them to me."

"Oh. Well...at least you were handed _something_ for your birthday."

"Stein, this isn't helping. I want my daughter...MAKA!"

"There's nothing I can do about that, Spirit. You keep pissing her off."

"But it's not my fault!" Spirit grabbed one of the women and smashed her head into his chest. "THEY CLICK ON TO ME!" Stein shook his head.

"I don't know what to do for you, Spirit. Enjoy your tonsils." Stein walked out the bar and Spirit threw the woman he grabbed on the floor violently.

"Screw this! I want Maka!" he announced to himself.

"Maka? Is that your wife?" asked the woman who was now on the floor. Spirit started bawling as he ran out the door.

Maka and the others were coming back from shopping. On their way back, they ran into Kid, Soul and Black Star.

"Hey, boys," Maka greeted.

"Hi, Maka, girls," Kid greeted back. Soul just smiled at her. Black Star wasn't paying attention.

"Maka, I ran into Stein earlier. He said it was your dad's birthday today," said Kid. Maka rolled her eyes.

"I know. I don't care."

"Uh...are you sure about that?"

"positive. I'm pretty sure he's spending his birthday with his girlfriends."

"But, Maka, I'm pretty sure you're the main one he wants to see on his birthday."

"Maybe so, but I don't want to give him the satisfaction."

"Maka, that's still your father."

"Sad isn't it? How was your day?"

"It was alright, but...don't change the subject."

"Eh...hey, Soul!" Maka walked over to Soul to ignore Kid. Black Star turned around and noticed the girls.

"Hey, when the hell did you guys get here?" he asked.

"We've been here, Black Star!" yelled Tsubaki.

"Really? Oh. Uh...hi, Tsubaki!" Maka hit him in the head with a book.

"You're late, Black Star!" she screamed.

"Late for what?" asked Black Star. Maka hit him again.

"But-" Again.

"Would you-" Again.

"Ma-" Again. Black Star's knocked out now. Soul was laughing his ass off. Maka hit him with her book too and knocked him out at the first try. Kid and the others were watching with sweatdrops coming down their heads.

"WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT!" Maka screamed. Everyone looked at each other and ran away laughing nervously.

Maka put her head down and sighed. Her dad walked up behind her.

"Oh...hi, Maka. I didn't know you'd be here. WELL...? Have anything special to say to your daddy?"

"No."

"Nothing at all?"

"No."

"Nothing with a 'happy...' or something like that?"

"You don't make me happy." Spirit started to get teary eyed again.

"WHAT WILL IT TAKE, MAKA? WHAT WILL IT TAKE?"

"Shouldn't you know that?" Maka walked away. Spirit turned bleach white and stood there with a shocked expression on his face.

"I can't stand for this anymore. You will be with me, Maka!" Spirit announced to himself.

"What is she? Your wife?" shouted a man walking pass him.

"Shut up!" screamed Spirit.

*5 minutes later*

"maka..." Spirit was soaked in his own tears in the middle of the basketball court, forcing his depression out to anyone who walked by. Sort of like Crona. Kid walked over to him in a good mood. Well...he was in a good mood.

"Wow...I just got depressed all of a sudden..." he sighed. He looked down and noticed him on the ground.

"Good lord, please cheer up..." Kid begged weakly.

"Sorry...It's just that...Maka..." Spirit whimpered, buring his face in his many tears.

"Are you trying to kill yourself?"

"Yes. I've lived for long enough and it's not like Maka loves me."

"I'm pretty sure she loves you, you just keep pissing her off."

"QUIT SAYING THAT! I KNOW I PISS HER OFF!"

"DON'T YELL AT _ME _BECAUSE YOU PISS OFF YOUR DAUGHTER!"

"WELL MAYBE YOU'RE PISSING _ME _OFF!"

"OH YEAH?"

"YEAH! YOU. ARE. PISSING. ME. OFF!"

"WELL, I WAS GOING TO HELP YOU BUT I CHANGED MY MIND!"

"WHAT IF ACTUALLY WANTED YOUR HELP!"

"THEN I GUESS YOU WON'T GET IT!"

"OH SO THAT'S HOW IT IS? YOU CAN'T TAKE A JOKE?"

"NO! MAYBE I CAN'T TAKE A JOKE!"

"WHO SAID IT WAS A JOKE?"

"NO ONE DID! YOU SAID IT FIRST!"

"WELL MAYBE IT WASN'T EVEN A JOKE IN THE FIRST PLACE!"

"I NEVER SAID IT WAS A JOKE! _YOU _SAID IT WAS A JOKE!"

"I NEVER SAID IT WAS A JOKE EITHER!"

"WELL THEN, LET ME ASK YOU SOMETHING!"

"GO FOR IT!"

"WHY THE FUCK ARE WE STILL YELLING AT EACH OTHER?"

"YOU TELL ME! YOU STARTED IT!"

"NO I DIDN'T!"

"DID TOO!"

"DID NOT!"

"BOTH OF YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP!" screamed a man. Kid and Spirit were shut down. Spirit buried his face back in the pool of tears.

"Goodbye world. Ow...my throat..." he whimpered.

"How about this, I'll get her for you."

"WHO SAID YOU COULD DATE MY DAUGHTER? ow...my throat..."

"No, that's what I...wait, what's wrong with me dating your daughter?"

"I don't trust guys."

"But she lives with one. Two actually."

"Don't remind me! They could both be making passes at her, and you want to talk about dating her. What the hell is the matter with you?"

"I never said..."

"It's okay, she'll learn when I'm dead." He buried his face again.

"God, you're so annoying."

"Now you're calling God annoying. You're going to Hell."

"No, I wasn't...If you don't stop screwing around with me, I'll rape Maka when you kill yourself with your own pitiful tears."

"Ah! Don't do that to my little girl."

"I will if you don't work with me. Now listen, I'll try to get Maka over to you and wish you a happy birthday. How's that?"

"That'd be great! Thank you! Wait, you're not really going to rape her, are you?"

"Spirit, I'd never do that to her-"

"See! I knew it! You _love _her! _Love_!"

"Spirit, shut the fuck up, I love Liz. Just let me do this so that this stupid chapter will end."

"Okay...meanwhile, I'll be laying here in my tears...hey...the sun dried them up."

"What is wrong with you? You never act this hopelessly stupid."

"You know my rate of stupidy?"

"Nevermind. I'm going now."

Maka was walking around in the city and Kid used his skateboard to chase after her. She noticed that he was behind her. She figured he wanted to keep talking about her father. She ran away from him.

"Wait, Maka!" yelled Kid. He shifted off to her. She ran into a dead end, trying to avoid him.

"Maka, please, let me talk to you," Kid pleaded. Maka threw a book at his face like he was some guy trying to steal her purse. (Not that she had one)

Kid lowered his head and wiped the blood from his nose. "Damn."

She threw another one at him.

"Where the hell are these books coming from?" Kid snapped. Maka got offended and kicked him in his face.

"What do you want?" she asked coldly.

"..."

"Well?"

"You inherited your father's madness."

"DON'T COMPARE ME TO MY FATHER!"

"See?"

"Kid, just tell what you came here to tell me. I'm not in the mood."

"Listen, Maka, I understand that your father isn't the best person you can think of, and I understand that he's a cheater and that he has a bad relationship with your mother, but he's still your dad, you have to pay him the slightest bit of respect."

"For what? If he can't even respect my mother, then what could he do for me?"

"I understand the situation between your parents, but that has nothing to do with the relationship between you and your father. He loves you."

"Kid, you can't say that you understand me. You see..."

*_Way_ later on...*

"And that's why I can't pay any respect to him. Kid?"

*He's asleep. Snoring. Drooling. The whole nine yards.*

"Kid!" snapped Maka.

"Huh...? What?"

"Were you listening to me?"

"Oh...I...uh..."

"I guess all guys are the same."

"No, Maka. Not all guys are the same. I wasn't really asking you for much. Spirit loves you, Maka, he'll do anything he can to satisfy you, even if he can't do the same for your mother. But think about it, it's either she left town or the world. That's what my mother did, Maka. She left the world. Now I'm stuck with nothing but my father. He's all I have. Just wish him a simple happy birthday just to let him know that you care just as much as he does. You don't have to, but I'm just saying..."

Kid turned around sadly and walked away. Maka grabbed him arm.

"I'll tell him. And Kid, Lord Death's not the only one you have. You have us." Kid smiled at her.

"I know."

Kid walked back over to Spirit. Stein was hanging over him with a scalpel.

"Hm...what should I hand to him next year," he muttered to himself. "It doesn't matter that much, I'll take his rib."

"Uh..." Kid whimpered, backing away slowly.

"Oh, hey, Kid, did you want to talk to Spirit or did you want to play basketball?"

"Uh..."

"Oh well. It'll just stitch him back up and slap him so you can do whatever you were planning to do here. It's easier to look for his birthday gift on the other side."

"I didn't need to hear that."

"Oh, I didn't mean..."

"I don't need to know!"

"Okay."

Stein stitched him up and flipped him over.

"There, he should wake up soon." He slapped him in the face. Spirit started crying again.

"Why'd you do that?"

"I'm finished with your birthday gift for next year."

"I don't want it."

"It's a good present. I can't wait until next year." Stein got up and walked away. Spirit looked at Kid.

"I'm never doing this again. That conversation was so emotional. That is never going to happen again," snapped Kid.

"Aw...I'm sorry, Kid. Is she coming?"

"Yeah, she's coming."

"You don't look so good, you okay?"

"I'm fine."

Maka walked over to the basketball court.

"Uh...Dad?" she whimpered.

"Yes, sweatheart?"

"I wanted to..."

"You can tell me anything. Although I know you don't want to be here."

"No, Dad. I want you to know that I still love you and I wanted to wish you a happy birthday."

"Wait...you _love _me? _Love?_"

"Yes. There will come a day where you won't be here anymore, and I don't want you to go thinking that I didn't care about you."

"Maka...that's the sweated thing you've ever said to me since..."

"Since I was a little girl?"

"..."

"Dad?"

"..."

"He's frozen," said Kid.

"I...can't move," whimpered Spirit.

"Yeah, while you were knocked out, Stein was screwing with your body so he probably did something to you. Yeah...that'd make sense. He was screwing with your spine."

"He's gonna give me my spine?"

"No, he was just messing with it."

"Well, it doesn't matter. I got to hear that my daughter still loves me, and that makes me happy, moving or not. This was a good birthday. Thank you."

Maka walked up to her frozen father and gave him a hug.

"Don't worry, I'll always love you," she replied. "You just piss me off."

"..."

"Kid where are you?" Maka looked around for him. He was sitting far off somewhere to cry. Maka walked up to him and patted his back. Kid turned to her and smiled. Maka smiled back.

"I'm sure she's somewhere still loving you too."

"Thank you, Maka." Maka helped him up and put her arm across her back and Kid placed his arm on her shoulder. In this way they walked together down the road.

*The next day in the hospital*

"So...Dad...Stein put you in the hospital?" whimpered Maka, staring at her injured father.

"It's fine..."

"Are you sure? He has you rapped up like a mummy, only you can't move."

"It's alright..."

"But...uh..."

"Maka...don't talk about it, please."

"Sorry for being concerned."

"Yes, I'm just saying."

"No, you're being rude."

"No I'm not!"

"Yes you are!"

"No, I'm not!"

"You're pissing me off again!" She stomped out the room.

"Maka, I'm sorry!"

**Author's Note: All done. Hm. I'm been dying for this to be requested and now that it's been requested I only have a little to do for it. Being funny on purpose is hard...  
>Next time, it's...*drumroll* EXCALIBUR~! NO! I have to do it in 375 different ways. Something close to that number. Oh well, I'll have Kid do it for me.<strong>

**Kid: No, because you said I couldn't be symmetrical.**

**Author: Aw man.**


End file.
